Soon I found myself quietly crying in a bed that felt too big with monsters lurking that seemed not to care that I was under my covers; these were not monsters you could escape. Eventually, I cried myself to sleep while my beast seemed to nuzzle at our bond, at the inside of my mind to soothe me and herself. Pain. We had to manage it, learn to deal with it. We've done it before, we could do it again. We were strong enough and we were not going to let this pack or ourselves down. The rest of the night, of my sleep, was more peaceful that it had been, but it was still unsettling. I could only pray that Ethan figured his shit out, mostly because as I slept all I wanted was to be in his arms in a blanket of his scent that usually could keep the nightmares at bay. Most of the time. It was early morning when I was gently shaken out of my slumber. Soft light was creeping through the thick curtains that lined the wall of windows, breaking through the darkness. I was slowly shaken out of my sleep as the bed dipped and strong arms wrapped around me before drawing me into a warm chest. I felt him let out a long sigh before he kissed my shoulder. "I'm sorry, I was an ass," he breathed against my skin. I fluttered my eyes open and rubbed them before turned over to see apologetic blue-green eyes gazing back at me at hopefully. "What?" I murmured groggily, still half asleep. "I was an ass, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said those things or raised my voice, I hate myself for doing that, it was stupid and selfish," he said before shaking his head frustratedly. I scooted closer to him until my head rested on his chest with a tired sigh. He kissed my crown then rested his head on mine. "You're right. I'm sorry sunshine." I leaned back a little and rested my head on the pillow while he brushed some hair out of my face. "I'm not always right, I just don't want you to bring any more pain to yourself." Ethan kissed my forehead then pulled me back to him. "Did you sleep?" "Not really," I murmured against his skin. "Did you?" "No," he breathed out. We were quiet for a little before he nuzzled my hair and tossed a leg over me as I started to drift off again. His breathing became more steady as mine seemed to match his. Sleep. A peaceful damn sleep. The next day I woke up to the smell of bacon, coffee, and pancakes. I looked over at the clock to see that we had apparently slept well past noon and into the afternoon, but we needed it. We were both weary and tired; emotionally exhausted. A state like that isn't one we needed to work at full pace towards sorting this mess out. I slipped out of bed and pulled on some of Ethan's thick socks that I stole out of his sock drawer and a clean pair of bikini panties under my oversized long-sleeve shirt that was his. I could hear him messing around in the kitchen as the sound of bacon sizzling and the coffee pot gurgling murmured in the background. He was sipping some coffee with his back to me and lazily flipping the bacon over. For a moment I let my eyes drink him in before he turned around to see me leaning against the wall. He smiled tiredly and set his cup down before walking over to me; capturing my lips with his before he nuzzled my neck as his arms wrapped around me. "Hi," he breathed out as he pulled away from me, moving an unruly wave out of my face with a small smile. "Hey," I answered back groggily. "Coffee?" I nodded. I nodded and let him pull me into the kitchen where I climbed up onto a bar stool while he fixed my coffee. He seemed better. His wolf still felt pained, but it seems like he had a better handle on it–a control. He walked back to me with my coffee and placed a kiss on my forehead before handing it to me. "I'm making pancakes." "What shapes?" "Abstract art, obviously," he said cheekily, drawing a laugh from my lips as I rolled my eyes. He leaned closer to me and kissed the corner of my mouth before looking back to me as something flickered across my eyes. "I'm sorry again sunshine, I was such an ass." I gave him a small smile and kissed his palm while wrapped an arm around me. "I know, it's alright," I breathed out. "I only did what I did because I love you." He nodded. "I know, I'm glad." He kissed the shell of my ear then the rested his head on top of mine as I nuzzled his chest. "I love you too sunshine I just need a good kick in the ass sometimes." "Oh how I know," I replied onto his chest as a tiny sly smile tugged at my lips. He pulled back with a chuckle and shook his head at me as he went back to the simmering bacon, flipping it while I sipped at my coffee. "Always thinking of my ass," he muttered a little teasingly. I rolled my eyes and took another sip of my coffee as he flipped another piece in the pan with a thin layer of grease floating around the bacon."What do you want to do today sunshine?" he asked over his shoulder. "We have so much to do," I thought out loud. Ethan sighed a little as he flipped a pancake. He started to take the bacon out of the pan and lay them on a few paper towels to cool off. "We do, but I feel like we also need a break. Pop and Billy want to take us in the morning tomorrow and we both have to go in tomorrow. Besides everything else, I have a fantastic amount of paperwork to do, and initiation bullshit that I need you to help me with. "As much as I want to go keep digging, I also know that we both need to rest. Billy was going to bring over some records, I was thinking we could go through them and put a movie on?" I wiggled my head back and forth slowly as he brought over the plate of pancakes and bacon. "What movie?" He reached into the microwave and pulled out some scrambled eggs then set them down as well. "Your choice sunshine." I smiled deviously. "You sure about that?" He rolled his eyes and set some plates along with silverware and napkins on the table. "Yup," he replied quickly as he pulled some butter and syrup out of the refrigerator. "Well, get ready to scream then babe," I said as my lips tugged into a coy grin while Ethan's brows raised mischievously.