Still in between

Still in between

  “What do you mean by that, Lana?” Ivy asked with a tinge of confusion and curiosity. 
  “He’s not all that. Nate is not as angelic as you think, Ivy. Why beat yourself up?” Lana said as she scoffed, raising and crossing her arms.
Ivy rose too, trying to piece it together. Something about Lana’s reaction was alarming. Could Lana be right or simply jealous? Ivy wondered before speaking. 
  “If you are very uncomfortable seeing me worry about my husband’s death, you can just take the door and leave,” Ivy stated firmly as Lana scolded in disbelief. 
  “Are you seriously sending me out of your house?” Lana asked with a crumpled face. 
  “‘If’, that’s what I said.” Ivy retorted as she stared deeply at her friend with a billion thoughts running through her mind. 
  “I'm a little surprised that you think I'm kind of jealous of you because I'm not jealous of you, Ivy. I'm just trying to sympathize, seeing that you've invested so much into your relationship with Nate,” Lana clarified as she picked up her bag to leave before Ivy interrupted. 
  “Lana, I'm so sorry if you feel that way. You've done a lot for me and my family. I guess I only need some time to… figure things out well…” Ivy’s voice evened out as Lana turned to her briefly. 
  “Ivy, I hope you understand that not everything that meets the eye is real.” Lana said one last time and left, leaving Ivy to her thoughts. 
Ivy sat back down as she exhaled, confused. She wondered if she was making the right choices or not. 
It made her rethink Lana’s words. Besides, why did Nate leave badly on the day of their anniversary? 
Did he really cheat and deny it?
Ivy continued to think of the possibilities. 

…
Days passed. Days turned into weeks, and weeks turned into months. 
Ivy tried as best as possible to navigate a new life without the only man who showed her genuine love. 
Ivy resolved to work harder and harder as a good distraction. 
Meanwhile, Kendra and Justice had returned to school, and they might return for the holidays. 
Prisca was sent to the nursing home after she continuously accused Ivy it hurting Nate. Alvin was in total support of the decision after all. 
On a crisp, cold day, Ivy had just closed from work. 
Although she was the CEO of her brand, Ivy chose to work, serving as a distraction. 
For some weeks now, Alvin had been dropping by to check in on her, but Ivy kept distancing herself to avoid their past interfering with their present lives and future. 
  “Ruby, I'm not so sure if this proposal is good enough. I mean, the pitch is wack. Who gave these incompetent companies the audacity to send in a proposal with very low credits?” Ivy complained while flipping through each page like it was a tug of war. 
Finally, Ivy tossed the document away, shifting her gaze to Ruby, who was swamped with a variety of documents on the couch. 
  “Ma’am, I can't find anything reasonable either,” Ruby also said, putting the document on the table before her. 
  “Look, Ruby, next time, don't accept a proposal that does not have enough credits to vouch for them. You know, I get that they are only starting, but come on, shouldn't their pitches do a bit of magic and at least hook me?” Ivy said and sighed. “Enough for today. It's almost 8 PM. We need rest,” Ivy said as Ruby nodded, gathering the documents back into a file. 
  “How about GlamChicks Cosmetic? Should we schedule a meeting?” Ruby asked.  
  “Yes, let's give them a chance. Meanwhile, scrub the city and outside it for a company we can collaborate with; this will make this work effectively. Have you sent the template to the PR team?” Ivy asked Ruby while grabbing her cell phone. 
  “Yes, Matthew is on it…” 
  “Great!” Ivy said as she grabbed her bag and work iPad into the bag while Ruby grabbed the files, ready to leave. “I’ll see you tomorrow. Rest well, okay?”
  “And you too, ma'am. You barely leave early to get to your house, why? You need some rest too…” Ruby pointed out with concern as Ivy’s lips pursed. 
  “Yeah, I'm only... taking my time. The kids are in school, Lana is busy with... whatever that's making her happy, and I'm just… stuck here. Guess what? I love it here anyway,” Ivy said, a hint of sadness lacing her tone.  
  “Oh, ma'am, the office is never fun,” Ruby said and scoffed lightly. “Well, my family is organizing a little party for my cousin’s graduation. Would you... Would like to join?” asked Ruby with a tinge of hope in her eyes as Ivy contemplated for some seconds and replied. 
  “When is it?” Ivy asked, slightly interested. 
  “It's this Sunday afternoon,” Ruby snapped excitedly. 
   “Well, if I'm not so busy, I’ll swing by. Thanks for the invitation, by the way…” Ivy sincerely said as her lips folded, deeply contemplating if it would be a good idea since it's been six months since she last went out for a party or social activity. 
  “Okay, then. I’ll text you the address on Sunday morning—just in case you plan on missing the party,” Ruby joked as Ivy’s lips curled into a guilty smile. 
  “I won’t forget, Ruby…” Ivy assured me as Ruby headed off.
Once again, the silence that crept in could cut. Again, Ivy was surrounded by deep silence and a dozen thoughts. 
Ivy slowly walked to the empty soft couch and sat. She took off her high heels and lay on her side as everything that she's experienced lately flashed before her. 
The loneliness, the silence, the pain, the mystery, and the weight of everything weighed down on her. 
For the past months, all that she tried to do was work and search for the person responsible for Nate’s sudden passing. 
It was still a mystery that the police couldn't find the one responsible.  
It was only confirmed that the brakes were tampered and that there had been a number that had constantly Nate. 
Even though Detective Calvin had assured Ivy that the culprit would be found, Ivy was still skeptical about it. The thoughts were endless, and Ivy couldn't move on. 
Ivy slept off on the couch, drained by thoughts.

About thirty minutes later, the door creaked open gently. Ivy’s eyes swiftly opened, as if she were stung by a bee. 
Her gaze landed on Alvin. It had been weeks since they last met. After the funeral arrangements, he’s been about his business until recently, he returned back to the city. 
  “Vin? You're here... I didn't think you'd stop by,” Ivy said, her eyes brimming with sleepiness as she managed to sit up. Ivy realized that she had fallen asleep. She rubbed her temples and yawned. 
  “Are you okay? Why are you still in the office?” he asked, as he briefly looked around before sitting next to her. 
  “I… I overslept,” she said almost in a whisper. “How did you find me?” she asked,  her voice lifting a bit. 
   “I asked the security outside and they told me that you haven’t left the office yet,” he calmly explained as he took off his blazer, placing it over the chair’s arm rest. 
  “I see,” Ivy said as she tried to rise. Alvin held her back gently as their eyes met. Ivy quickly took off her gaze wjike Alvin asked. 
  “Are you really okay?
  “I'm very okay, I only overslept…” she said almost defensively. “Why did you come?” Ivy couldn't help but ask again.
  “To see you,”
  “To see me?” Ivy repeatedly and scoffed lightly. “Alvin, you've been gone for a month, and you being here is very suspicious,” Ivy blurted out as Alvin rubbed his face, almost as if he was frustrated.
  “Do you really think that I'm some—”
  “No, I'm not thinking anything. I'm just concerned about everything…” Ivy said as she paused for a second and continued. “I'm sorry, Alvin. I've been thinking about a lot lately....” she looked away, sniffing.
  “Would you like to share?” he calmly asked, refusing to give up on Ivy even if she was aloof. When Ivy was about to speak, Alvin took her hands and gave them a gentle squeeze. 
  “I can understand what you're passing through, but I want you to understand one thing. Don't ever feel that your efforts are below the minimum. You've done all that you could for Nate. It's time to let go,” he said. His soft gaze landed on Ivy’s worried gaze. She felt some wave of security from Alvin despite how hard she tried to avoid it. 
  “I don't know, Alvin—I’m devastated without Nate….”
  “Hey, sweetheart. I told you before, don't beat yourself up over it. Wherever he is, he knows that you loved him beyond everything,” Alvin said as he placed a light kiss on Ivy’s knuckles. 
The wave of it sent some chills down her spine. 
Was the flame between them igniting again? Was history repeating itself? Ivy was contemplative.
  “Give me the chance to make your pain your pain go away. Ivy, I promise to make you feel loved again—”
  “Alvin, what we shared was never real. It was a mistake—a gush of lust,” Ivy let out forcefully. 
  “It was love, until the boat sank. You chose Nate over me, and I understand why. I was… I was not fit for you, but I am now. I promise, I’m a different man,” he tried to assure her. Ivy instantly rose, crossing her arms, looking away from Alvin.  
Yes, they shared a past, and they were deeply in love until Alvin’s wrong decisions influenced their relationship. And Nate was the perfect choice. Ivy was drawn to Nate’s calm, angelic nature. 
  “Alvin, we can't work out. What we had was not real, and you are Nate's brother,” she clarified firmly. 
  “We are not doing anything wrong! And if you think that I would back down from chasing after you? I'm sorry, but that's not happening in this life and the next life to come.” Alvin firmly said so too. At that point, Ivy was confused, she was scared to give in. What if he hurts her again? Was it even the right thing to do, only because they were a couple before? Ivy couldn't stop thinking, but one thing was certain: her feelings for Alvin were not as they used to be. 
  “Can I… Can I at least take you home, even if you don't want me?” Alvin softly asked as Ivy spun gently to face him.