Chapter 63 Dead!
|| Author POV ||
The morning sunlight spilled softly across Rosa’s glowing features. Her eyes fluttered open, adjusting to the light as she slowly sat up. Her eyes were puffy because of sleepiness.
She looked to her side, empty.
She remembers, they slept together last night. And just like the other times, he wasn’t there when she woke up. He never was. He always woke up before her.
Her eyes wandered around the quiet room, aimlessly searching. A part of her still believes this might be a dream.
Sleeping beside him, feeling his warmth. Her emotion floods whenever she’s with him.
|| Rosalie’s Pov ||
I looked down at my lap. My fingers played with each other in slow circles. My heart was too full to move.
I don’t know how long I’ll be here with him. Am I really his girlfriend? Does this title holds a lot?
He was so cold before. Like a wall I could never climb no matter how much I tried to reach. Even now, he’s still cold. But he also touches me like I belong to him. Holds me like I’m something precious.
I don’t understand how things have changed. But a part of me is too scared to ask.
Because what if this warmth, this closeness–
What if it’s just temporary?
What if I wake up one day and it’s all gone?
And even worse. What if I already gave him all of me and that still wasn’t enough?
My fingers played with the hem of blanket without even realizing. It’s warm now. Summer has slowly arrived in. Winter feels far away.
It’s been two months. Two whole months since everything changed. Sometimes I just sit quietly and wonder. How did I end up here?
I’m still scared of him. He is so cold. I can’t speak when he looks at me. I don’t understand him.
I gave him everything. Not just my body but my heart. My trust.
I didn’t have much to offer but I gave it all to him. I don’t know what else is left of me to give. And now, I also don’t know what I’d do if he walked away. The thought of losing him now, it hurts. It hurts so bad to even think.
More than I expected.
Sometimes I think, If he hadn’t kept me, Where would I be now? Would I have made it all alone? He’s still my professor.
This still feels forbidden. But when I’m with him, I forget all of that.
I shook my head gently. My heart, it was starting to feel heavy again.
No.
No.
I should believe in the present. Even if it’s a dream, I want to live every second of it. Please, dear God!
I miss my momma, papa. I want to see them, so badly. It’s been months since I’ve visited them.
I sniffled quietly, brushing away the unwelcomed tears before they could fall. I slowly got off his bed and padded back to my room. I showered. Pulled on a simple frock and brushed my hair slowly. It’s a holiday. I don’t have classes.
I walked downstairs quietly. I told sister Lilia that I’d be going out for a while. Should I have told him too?
No, I didn’t want to bother him. He’s a busy man. I don’t want to be a burden.
I stood by the big doors and bent down to wear my shoes, the ones with the soft little bows on them.
“Are you going somewhere?”
I froze.
His voice.
I slowly turned my head, eyes lifting and there he was standing. He was dressed in his business suit. God, how can someone look this good?
Those piercing on his eyebrows makes him look so unreal. I can’t believe he’s my boyfriend. I blinked, completely distracted when he walked toward me. My heart thudded louder.
He stopped in front of me and I had to tilt my head all the way up to see his face properly. He’s so tall. I feel like a child before him.
“I-it’s just.. I wanted to go–”
“To where?” he asked.
I fiddled with my fingers. I didn’t want to lie.
“Cemetery–” I peeked at him again. He was looking down at me with those blue eyes of his “...To see my p-parents.” I added, my fingers fidgeting at my sides.
My chest ached just saying it out loud. I didn’t even know if he knew they were gone. I still remember that day. When I was late to class and he said,
‘I think someone must have passed away for you to be this late. Does your father count?’
I felt hurt that day.
I bit my bottom lip, waiting for his reply. He didn’t speak right away. He just stood there staring down at me. His presence was quietly strong.
I’m not blushing, right? I hope I’m not. It’s embarrassing how he makes me blush just by looking at me.
There’s something mysterious about him, like he’s someone dangerous. He even looks at me with those dark eyes. Was he going to a business meeting? He looked serious like he had somewhere important to be.
“I’ll take you there.” he said simply.
That was all.
Then he turned and walked out. Is he going to give me a ride? Won’t he be late because of me?
I made a tiny run to catch up. When I reached his side, I flinched as his hand suddenly took mine.
I looked down. My fist was now resting inside his large palm. He didn’t even glance at me, just kept walking. Why does he have to be so cold? I pouted.
My eyes stayed glued to our hands. He’s so big. My hand, it almost disappears inside his. I blinked my eyes, feeling so tiny next to him. God made him so big. This is so unfair.
I glanced up at his face. He looked calm.
The car ride was silent. I looked out. My hands clutched the window frame as we reached near the cemetery. I inhaled deeply, my chest tightened when the iron gates came into view.
I stepped out of the car slowly. The gravel crunched beneath my shoes. The wind was gentle. The sun is warm. But my heart... it felt so heavy. I walked ahead a few steps, then stopped and looked at him inside the car.
“You.. can go.”
I whispered quickly, almost to myself, then turned back without waiting for his response and started walking between the rows of graves.
I don’t want to waste his time and top of that I was feeling like crying already. My steps were careful. Like if I moved too fast, my tears might fall without warning.
Everything felt so heavy all of a sudden. The quiet reminded me of what this place truly was. Graveyard. People. Buried. Gone. Dead.
That thought made my skin crawl and want to run away. That’s why I don’t like coming here. I walked between the rows.
And I finally stopped when my eyes found her name.