Chapter 84

Chapter 87
Harper

I let the tears fall as soon as he left the house. And I am beating myself up for pushing him so hard. It’s not like I don’t trust Levy, of course I do. But whatever is worrying him - which it is, because I could see the angst written all over his face – he needs to tell me.

It upsets me that he is treating me like a child, although I know he regards me as an equal and an adult it just doesn’t feel like it right now. God, all these conflicting emotions are too much to handle.

A gentle knock to my door, I lift my head and wipe my tears away. “Can I come in, Sis?” Taylor asks from the other side. I’m sitting cross legged on the bed clutching one of my favorite Teddy bears from when I was a kid. Back when things were normal and I had a non-alcoholic and junkie mother. Oh, and a father.

“Yes,” I mumble. The door opens and Taylor comes in.

“Are you okay? I couldn’t help but over hear most of it.”

“I’m fine, it’s not like we’ve broken up or anything. I just need some space. He’s treating me like a baby.” I let out a huff and blow a strand of hair away from my face that didn’t quite make it into my messy bun.

“Maybe he has good reason not to tell you whatever it is. Perhaps it’s something he needs to sort out on his own.” She puts an arm around my shoulders. I lean my head on hers.

“That’s not the point though, Taylor. He is supposed to be able to tell me everything.”

“It could be about his business, maybe things are getting strained. I mean, we know he has buckets of money but he’s taking on a new diner, the place in Montana and you know it could be financial worries. Why would he have to tell you? It’s not like you’re married. Hell, you guys aren’t even engaged.”

I sniffle, “what are you saying?” I say as she takes in a deep breath.

“All I’m saying is that you don’t need to know everything about his business or shit, Harper. I could understand if you had a ring on your finger but you guys have only just started seeing it other properly. He doesn’t have to divulge literally every detail to you. I am sure that if Levy has reason not to let you in on this thing, then he has good reason not to.”

“What if it’s something serious? He had bad dreams the other night and kept calling out someone’s name.”

“Did you ever Google Levy, Harper?”

“Google him? Are you insane? I’ve known Levy since forever.”

She goes silent on me but she has got the cogs working in my mind now. “Let’s do it.”

“Are you sure?” she replies. “What if we find something we aren’t going to like?”

Shit, I hadn’t thought of that. Would I want to know if there is something bad in his past? How would it impact how I feel about him now? What if it means I don’t want to ever see him again? Suddenly I feel an ounce or two of fear creeping through my body.

“I’m not sure, Taylor that I’m ready to find out anything bad about Levy. That is if there is anything bad lurking in his past.”

“Exactly, so why push him on whatever he isn’t telling you. Listen, I know Levy too. He’s always been there for us growing up and especially when you were with Dylan. And he’s been amazing since you two got together, for me personally, it’s like having a dad.”

I never thought about it like that from her perspective but I guess he is like a father figure to her and Dylan like an elder brother. “If it were me, which I know it isn’t, I think I’d be a little more patient with him.”

“Yeah, but what if it is really bad? He is in a biker gang, they have history.”

“Then let him sort his shit out. You can’t fight all his battles, Harper nor should you. He’s a grown man. He’s got, what eighteen years on you?”

I nod; she is correct. Levy is a fully grown man and he can more than handle himself.

Exhaling I wipe my face again. “And go and wipe your face, your mascara has streaked. You look scary,” she says which makes me smile. I can only imagine how awful I look.

“Oh, and another thing.” God, she sounds like she is the parent here and not the younger sister. “Maybe message him because I am guessing he feels like one heart broken man right now. You know how much he loves you, that man literally would die for you.”

I stand and use both my hands to scrub over my face, “I know. I feel like a bitch. You’re right, Taylor. I had absolutely no right to be in his face about his shit. I need to trust that he is doing whatever he can about whatever it is. I only wanted to be there for him and to help him. Not kick him out.”

“You could have fooled me; you shouldn’t have asked him to leave. Levy did nothing wrong except he is protecting you it seems, from something. Listen, I know it’s none of my business and you think I am just a child, but I’ve had to become an adult real quick, just like you. When he is ready, he will let you in on whatever he is keeping from you. At least you don’t have to worry that he is fucking around behind your back. If a man leaves town like he did he’s got big shit to sort out.”

“I know,” I say lamely and ashamed of myself. Yes, Levy could have told me what’s going on but on the flip side, I had absolutely no right to act like a child about it and kick him out. I wish I hadn’t done that.

“Go get cleaned up, message him and then get some sleep. We’re picking Momma up in the morning.” She slides herself off the bed and gives me a hug.

Once she’s gone, I clean my face in the bathroom. She was right, I look pretty scary like something out of a Halloween movie with mascara down my face and blotchy skin and red eyes. I brush my teeth and blow my nose then go back into the bedroom and crawl under my duvet. From the stand by the bed, I reach for the mobile and send Levy a message.

Sorry I was a bitch. I shouldn’t have kicked you out like that. I feel awful.

There is no response, I lay back and wait. It feels endless like the seconds are hours, no days even. Then I see the bubbles appear then disappear.

You’re not a bitch, baby. I want to tell you but it’s not the right time. Trust me to get this sorted first and then I promise I will tell you what happened.

I can be patient. Are you okay?

Except for my heart, yeah, I’m fine. Get some rest you girls have a big day ahead of you tomorrow. It’ll be hard first day back with your mother so please promise to get some sleep.

I’ll try but I miss you.

I miss you too. I missed you before I left.

Now he’s making me swoon and my body tingles for him. The familiar ache appears between my legs. My emotions are giving me fucking whiplash.

Are you leaving town again?

No, that I can guarantee. Lex is on to something for me and the gang are helping. How about day after tomorrow we do something special with your mother? Afterwards you and I can talk.

That sounds like a plan. I will see what momma would like to do, she has missed out on so much staying in the house drinking and using drugs. She has probably forgotten what the outside looks like.

No doubt. Okay, let me know if you don’t have anything in mind, I can take you ladies out for the day somewhere special. I’m hoping my place in Montana will be finalized in the next few weeks. If you want you can all go to Montana with me to see what you think.

Montana? What we think? Is he proposing something here?

Sure, that would be awesome. We’d love to see it. I try to play it cool but inside I am as excited as a kid on Christmas day.

Now, sleep. Goodnight baby. I love you so much, try not to worry about anything. I’ve got my brothers; they’re taking good care of me.

Sweet dream, Gorgeous xoxo

I close the mobile down, place the lead into it to charge it and rest my head on the pillow.

If only we could all just up-sticks and head off to his new ranch in Montana. Now wouldn’t that be a dream come true?