Chapter 39 ANCIENT MAGIC
I don't know how long I've been pacing outside Lyra's bedroom. My feets hurt but I barely register the pain, not when my sister has been under medical care for several hours from a fucking stab wound.
Amelyn shifted into her dragon form and we carried Lyra inside. The moment Imogen saw her, he ordered us out of the room, saying that he needed the space to work.
It's been hours, still no fucking feedback. Auren was also in there with them so I had thought to ask him how Lyra was doing. But each time I reached out mentally, he slammed down his walls till he permanently shut me out.
That only makes my anxiety spike harder.
My fingernails dig crescents into my palms. I try to steady my breathing, but the panic presses against me like a living thing.
What if she lost too much blood? What if Imogen can’t fix the damage?
What if…what if…
I stop myself before the next thought can form in my mind. I lean against the cold wall and squeeze my eyes shut, but the pressure only stirs tears I refuse to let fall.
I can’t lose her. I can’t.
My heartbeat refuses to slow down. Every sound makes me flinch, and every passing second feels like another weight added to my chest.
I just need someone to tell me she’s breathing, that she’s alive, and not slipping away into some cold lifeless dimension.
But the door stays closed, and the silence is slowly nibbling at my sanity.
I press my palm against the wall again, as if I can somehow sense her heartbeat through the stone.
Stupid and desperate, but I can’t stop myself. My magic prickles beneath my skin, reacting to the fear I’m barely keeping contained.
My legs shake. I don’t know if it’s exhaustion or terror, probably both.
A cold breeze slips under the doorframe, Imogen’s healing wards, but instead of comforting me, it sends a shiver straight down my spine.
Something’s wrong, I can feel it.
My breathing picks up, too fast, too shallow. The corridor feels smaller, the walls closing in inch by inch. I rub at my chest, trying to ease the crushing heaviness, but it doesn’t budge. It grows.
What if she screams and I don't? What if she asks for me? What if she…no, no, stop…
I press my trembling fingers to my temples and gently rub, trying to soothe the headache.
“Please,” I whisper to no one, to the air, to the gods…hell, to Lyra herself. “Just hold on.”
A pair of soldiers walk by, offering me a sympathetic look, but I can’t even force myself to acknowledge them. Speaking feels impossible. Breathing feels like a battle.
What if she never wakes up?
What if I lose her because I wasn’t fast enough?
What if this is my fault?
What if I dragged her into this mess?
The thought hits me hard, so hard I grip the wall to steady myself. The bond between us flickers faintly in my chest, weaker than before… or maybe that’s my panic twisting everything out of shape.
My heart slams painfully against my ribs.
Auren should know something by now. He should have said something. He should have…
I swallow hard, trying not to cry out in frustration.
Why won’t he answer me? Why is he shutting me out?
I try again, pushing a small thread of thought toward him.
“Auren… please. Anything. Please.”
Nothing. Just a solid, immovable wall.
My stomach sinks violently. The lack of response feels worse than outright bad news. It feels like they’re hiding something from me. It feels like..
A wooden tray clatters somewhere down the hallway, and I jump so hard my knees nearly buckle. My nerves are stretched so thin I’m surprised they haven’t snapped.
I start pacing again. Faster this time. I bite down on my lip to keep my breathing steady, but the metallic taste of blood fills my mouth.
It’s too damn quiet.
Each second scrapes against my bones.
Auren… Lyra… someone…
Please just open that fucking door.
The silence feels like a noose tightening with every passing heartbeat.
And I am one breath away from breaking, and just when I think I'll finally lose my sanity, the door swings open revealing a blank faced Auren.
“Step inside," is all he said before turning around and disappearing further into the room. I hesitate, not sure what I'll find inside. But the need to see my sister surpasses every doubt I have and I step fully into the room.
My breath stops.
Lyra is lying on the bed, skin s purplish hue and completely liveless. The only sign of life is the steady rise and fall of her chest.
“What happened to her?" I'm surprised at how steady my voice sounds when deep down I'm boiling with mived feelings.
“Honestly, My Lady, she might never wake up," Imogen responds.
“What!!!"
Auren's hands come to settle on my shoulder, turning me around softly. “Imogen ran some tests, and we noticed something. The dagger was dipped in something dark and ancient, probably one of the long forgotten dark magic types.”
“Certainly not forgotten if someone still uses it," Imogen pipes in.
I turn to Auren, heart beating so fast it might fall out to the floor. “There has to be an antidote, right?"
He nods slowly. “But you can't find an antidote without knowing the type of magic that was used to make the poison. " His hand moves up to caress my cheek. " Imogen is working on it. He'll find out the type of magic involved, then we can get an antidote for Lyra.”
“I'm scared, Auren," I mutter, turning to stare at my once jovial sister, now lying down without an inch of life in her. “What if she never wakes up? What if I lose her forever."
Auren’s thumb brushes over my cheek, gentle, steady, grounding but it doesn't help. I still feel like I’m drowning.
“I won’t let that happen,” he murmurs.
His voice is firm, but all I hear is hope, not certainty. Hope isn’t enough, hope can’t bring her back.
My chest tightens until I can barely breathe.
I move closer to Lyra, standing at the edge of the bed. Her skin looks wrong, too pale in some places, too purple in others, like bruises blooming beneath her surface. She looks cold, empty, and fragile.
This isn’t my sister.
This isn't the girl who had danced around the market, forcing me to buy dresses and trinkets..
My throat burns and I press my fingers against my lips before a sob escapes. Gods, she looks dead. She looks…
No! I stop myself from thinking any further.
My knees wobble, and Auren steps behind me instantly, one arm circling my waist as if he senses I’m about to collapse.
His warmth presses against my back. It should help, but doesn’t.
Not really.
The fear inside me is too loud, it can be heard miles away.
What if she never opens her eyes again? What if this is the last time I see her breathe? What if I had gotten her killed?
My mind spirals until everything inside me feels like it’s cracking.
A soft sound slips from my throat, broken, weak, and Auren pulls me back against him fully.
“Little Flame,” he whispers, his lips near my temple. “Look at me.”
I can’t. I can’t bring myself to look away from Lyra.
My eyes sting, and before I know it, tears spill over. I wipe them away furiously.
I don’t want to cry.
Not here, not now, and certainly not when she needs me to be strong.
But I’m falling apart, piece by piece, and I can't find it in me to put myself together.
Auren turns me gently, his hands warm on my arms. I meet his eyes because resisting him feels impossible, and gods, the softness there nearly breaks me open completely.
“You’re not losing her,” he says, low and steady. “Not today. Not ever.”
“You don’t know that,” I whisper, voice trembling. “You don’t, none of us do.”
His jaw clenches. Not in anger, but in worry and helplessness. It makes something in my chest twist painfully.
He lifts his hand and cups the back of my neck, pulling me closer until our foreheads touch. His breath fans across my lips, warm and steady.
“Listen to me,” he murmurs. “I swear to you, Haven, on my magic, on my crown, on every damn piece of my soul, we will save her.”
My breathing stutters.
I close my eyes, leaning into him because I need something solid to hold onto or I’ll fall apart completely.
His scent wraps around me, smoke, night air, something clean and warm, and for a moment, just a moment, I’m able to breathe.
“She looks so empty,” I whisper. “It’s like she’s already gone.”
“She’s not.” Auren’s hand slides to my cheek, his thumb brushing another tear away. “ She’s still with you.”
I shake my head weakly. “Barely.”
“Barely is still something we can hold on to.”
I let out a shaky breath, leaning more of my weight into him. His arms come around me fully, holding me against his chest. He presses his chin gently to the top of my head.
And the moment he does, the last bit of strength I was clinging to snaps.
I clutch at his tunic, the fabric twisting in my fists. My body shakes, not from weakness but from fear, raw and vicious.
“I can’t do this without her,” I whisper into his chest. “She’s all I have left.”
I can't imagine moving forward without Lyra. Aunt would probably lose her sanity. I feel guilt rush over me just thinking about it
Auren’s embrace tightens.
“No,” he whispers, his lips pressing softly to my hair. “You have me. You’re not alone in this. I won’t let you face any of it alone. We will get to the bottom of this, no matter what it takes. ”
My heart breaks a little more from fear, from relief, from the terrifying comfort of his promise.
Auren holds me together in silence, and for the first time since the market, I let myself tremble in his arms.