"You've lost a lot of weight."
The two looked at each other in silence for a long time, and the first to break the silence was Aston.
His heart ached with pain.
Kayden, who had once been so beautiful, had now lost a lot of weight.
He couldn't imagine what Kayden had gone through to become so thin. He could tell that Kayden's eyes weren't even as bright as they used to be, and she seemed a lot weaker.
"You know how I am, so you know that being thin isn't a big deal to me. I need to be relieved of my dependence on that drug. As long as I can pull it off, I'll grow fat by eating more later."
Kayden finished her words optimistically. She seemed to be in a good mood.
It turned out that after actually seeing Aston, all those pent-up misses tumbled out instead. It was amazing that she was actually missing someone.
"I'll cure you of your secret. Don't worry. You'll get out of that place and then travel like a normal person and be able to play everywhere. You'll never be coerced again, and you'll never depend on these things again."
"Miss Lane told me that you've been busy in the lab every day for me. Will it be hard? Actually, it's always been me who's wronged you, and it's always been me who's acted arbitrarily. You didn't have to do that."
Kayden said in a downcast voice, while Aston hurriedly spoke up.
"I don't blame you for cheating on me in the first place. Everyone has their own difficulties, and I don't care about the deception between us back then anymore. I just want you to get well soon. You have not wronged me. I'm the one who wasn't strong enough for you to rely on, so you had to deal with the problems you faced in your own way. I'm not tired at all either, and I live every day to the fullest. Just like before in the lab, I went to work during the day to do the research I loved and came home at night and rested. You know, I'm not much of an entertainer. I used to read books at home even if I didn't work so many shifts in the lab. I just don't have any more recreational time now, but I'm not hurting my body. You mustn't think I can't take care of myself."
Kayden suddenly felt a little sad and lowered her head. She felt her eyes were already filled with tears, but she didn't want to expose this vulnerable expression to Aston.
"Actually, I've often wondered that if I hadn't chosen you in the first place, wouldn't I have caused you so much trouble and even brought you harm?"
Kayden hung her head and spoke slowly.
"I didn't grow up the same way as you did. I was an orphan when I was a child and I grew up in struggles. Maybe I wasn't meant to be kind. It was your bad luck to meet me. If I hadn't met Mr. Knight back then, maybe my life would have been rotten and miserable. But he saved me and nurtured me. He was the best person for me at that time, so I served him to repay him and did a lot of unpleasant things for him. I've never regretted it."
"Even when I was coerced into being with Eric, I didn't regret choosing you then, but I regret now that I chose you as a target in the first place. The more I see you being nice to me and the more I see you not caring about what happened back then, the harder it will actually be for me. I don't even know what I'm dwelling on, and what I'm being pretentious about. But I just don't know how I can make up for cheating on you and hurting you back then, even if you didn't even mind."
This was what was on Kayden's mind and she decided to say it after a long consideration.
She wanted to tell the man in front of her exactly what was on her mind. She wanted Aston to see clearly what kind of a person she really was.
"Sometimes in a person's life, bad things will happen, but that doesn't mean it will ruin your whole life."
"I read a story before about a man who had studied hard for 10 years for his exams and his family was in very tough conditions. He was on his way to J City to take the exam when he suddenly came across a flash flood, which then blocked him on that road and he could never go forward again. A poor man like him had managed to raise hundreds of dollars to be able to go to J City for the exams, but his 10 years of hard work was ruined because of this flash flood."
"That young man tried for a long time but still couldn't get through the road. He couldn't find any other way either, until he heard the news from J City that the exams had been completed, and he returned home with a lot of pain. Then he started working as an apprentice, copying books, working as a teacher, and trying to pay off his debts. But six months later, he heard the news that the people who were in the same village as him had set out a while before him, so they didn't get blocked by that flash flood and got through that road early. But they didn't go to J City for the exam either, because after they had been going for a while, there was a plague in the village ahead of them, and they were infected and died in a short time."
"It suddenly dawned on the young man who had been feeling sorry for himself that the suffering he had encountered back then was simply the loss of his exams, and that if he had insisted on making the journey, he might have died in another city too. It took a few more years before he finally went to J City to take the exam and then got the desired ranking. Is that a boring story I'm telling?"
Kayden didn't say anything and Aston continued to speak.
"Kayden, your appearance was sudden for me. You cheated on me and you hurt me. We didn't start well and there was a lot of deception mixed in with it. This love wasn't perfect from the start, but you know what the thing I'm most happy about?"
"I'm happy that I got that chance to be cheated on by you. Because of that, I met the love of my life. If you hadn't chosen to cheat on me, maybe I would have continued to concentrate on my experiments in the lab for the rest of my life. Until the day I die of old age, I will be left alone. I never expected my life to be smooth. I was only afraid that I would never find my beloved in my life and never know what it is like to love someone."
"But if you hadn't met me, you might have met someone better and would have had a more perfect relationship. You might have had someone you loved who was happy with you and then would have been married and had children long ago. Perhaps, because of my presence, it has instead ruined what might have been a beautiful marriage for you."
Kayden lifted her head this time as she said.
She always felt that her presence had brought disaster and misery to Aston.
Perhaps Aston's life would have been happier without her.
"If I could have regretted it or had ifs, I would have wished I had gone to the orphanage and found you at a very young age and protected you. If I could have made the choice, I would have rushed to research the drug before I even met you, so that you wouldn't have to be hurt. If I could have made the choice, I would have wished I had found someone to protect you when you were just born."
"You always think that if what happens, I'll meet someone better, but the truth is that if I hadn't met you, I could have ended up alone. Why do you dwell on things like this that never happened? Maybe if I hadn't met you, I would have even gotten into a car accident and passed away. I've never tried so hard before I met you. I had a very steady and happy time. That feeling of working hard for the love of your life is very fulfilling. In fact, it's not a difficult time for me, rather I feel happy."
This statement silenced Kayden for a long, long time. She hadn't expected Aston's thoughts to be like this.
She was always worried that Aston would blame her at some point and would resent her when he felt bad. Maybe he really liked her, but her deception and hurt might make them end up hurting each other more and more.
Yet Aston's thoughts were not at all what she had guessed. It was surprising that he really didn't even mind the whole thing anymore.
So it was just herself who had been putting her in torment and pain?
"Miss Lane said you wanted to see me. Aston, maybe I was thinking too much and that's why I didn't believe that you really wouldn't mind what I did before. Of course, I do mind myself being so unpleasant now. If you're really willing to wait for me, come to see me when I am at least halfway through my treatment I can't even be sure when I'll wake up, or what I'm doing when my sanity doesn't exist. I hope I will never look unpleasant and crazy in front of you. Will you wait for me?"