Chapter Twenty

Chapter Twenty
The one thing I had learned was that time passes slowly when you are waiting for something to happen. I had experienced that first hand. I had made the decision to return to my regular life. I didn’t know anything about Santa Fe so I believed I was better off going back to my old life. I kind of felt like if I changed my identity it would in effect erase Charles from my life. I didn’t want to do that at all. I still mourned him and I most likely would for many years to come. 

The easiest thing to do was to go back to the store I used to work at. That was exactly what I decided to do. I met with the old manager and I was rehired without hesitation. He told me there had been people looking for me early on but there hadn’t been anyone in months. That verified the information I had been given that I was no longer in danger. 

I had the job lined up and only needed a place to stay to complete my transition back to the mundane life of a normal citizen. I searched through “for rent” ads and found a house where a recent widow wanted to rent a room with kitchen privileges. I called and set up an appointment right away.

I arrived at my appointment about ten minutes early. Not early enough to get in the way but early enough to send the message that I was serious. I was greeted by a fortyish looking woman who opened the door. She introduced herself as Angela Dyer and explained that she had been struggling since her husband had died of cancer just a few months earlier. I told her about my husband being killed by a drunk driver and so we had some common ground. 

We talked for a long time even after we decided I would take the room. We talked about grief and how that affects the whole family. I knew the things she was feeling and she understood mine. She recognized me from a television news report about the John McKinley case. 

She asked about that case and I told her the jury had found him guilty and before he could serve any time he was killed at the courthouse. I told her the father of the victim shot the defendant and killed him as they were taking him back to his cell. I expressed my feeling about having to testify against the dad, knowing how I would feel if something had happened to Lincoln. 

I got the feeling that I could become good friends with Angela in time. We had so much in common even though the circumstances were different. Her husband’s death came after long suffering while mine was sudden like a robber in the night. We had some things we could talk about over a long boring night. I told her I had to appear at the arraignment hearing for the victim’s dad and hopefully I would be ready to move in after that.

I thanked her and handed her a check to pay for my rent and a security deposit. The federal government had given me money to get resettled since I opted to go with my old life. It was to help me get reestablished in my former job and relocate to suitable lodging.

I suggested to Angela that we could get some security items to put up around the house. I had most already purchased, that had been used at my old apartment, but I would feel safer with it all installed. She agreed and I told her I would bring the stuff when I came to move in.

Angela asked, “Was it scary to testify against someone you knew to be very dangerous?”

I replied, “I was terrified but I knew someone had to stand up to him and the people who worked with him.”

Angela said, “I am glad there are brave people like you to stand up to the thugs of the world.”

I said, “Thank you. I have to go back to the house where the marshals and my family are. I still have to testify and they haven’t released me yet. I don’t think this trial will last long. I can’t wait for it all to be over and I can get back to normal.”

I left the house after telling Angela goodbye. I made my way back to the safe house and Bryntley greeted me as I walked back into the house. It was later than I wanted it to be and Lincoln was already in bed. I hate when I miss time with him because I know he will eventually grow up and leave the nest. Bryntley told me that the arraignment had been set for tomorrow and we will have a clearer picture of what was going on with our killer. 

Bryntley said, “There are some leftovers in the refrigerator if you want something to eat.”

I replied, “I grabbed something on my way back from renting a room for me and the kid. I am ready to resume my life. I feel like I put everything on hold while the rest of the world traveled forward.”

I hadn’t really gotten anything to eat but I wasn’t hungry and I didn’t want Bryntley making a big deal out of it. I knew as soon as this trial was over Bryntley and Todd would move on to their next project. I would have to take care of myself as far as protection was concerned. 

Bryntley said, “I received something for you today.”

She pointed to three file cabinet boxes stacked in the corner of the living area in our safe house. When I looked inside the boxes I saw folders and stacks of paper. The folders had a stamp from the county prosecutor’s office. On the outside of each folder was printed “Case file of John McKinley”. 

I thought to myself, “This is it. These are the official files from the case.”

I took all three boxes with me to my room. It looked like one box was the case that had been collected by the prosecutor's office and the other box was the transcripts of the actual trial. I knew there would be a lot of things that were not allowed in the trial, there always are things the judge won’t let in and those are important for me to know. 

I wasn’t concerned with anything being prejudicial, I knew the dirt bag was guilty. John McKinley had a record for sure. He had arrests dating back to the age of fourteen. There have been numerous arrests since that time. Bad checks, assault, shoplifting and some early gang activity. He must have met his current associates during some of the gang activity. There would be a lot to read and take notes from, but for now I had to get some rest. I wanted to be present during the arraignment.

I had already told my host good night and Lincoln was already asleep so it was time for me to go to bed too. I put the lid back on my newfound treasures and climbed into bed. I pulled the covers over me and turned out the lamp that was right beside the bed. 

It had been a little while since I had dreamed about Charles but this was going to be one of those nights. I still missed him like crazy, probably always would and I always woke up in tears when I had one of those dreams. This wasn’t an exception and when I was fully awake I could feel the wet spots on my pillow. 

I went to the kitchen for a drink of water, still wiping my eyes as I walked to get a glass from the cabinet. Bryntley was sitting quietly at the dining table and saw me walk by.

Bryntley said, “Are you doing okay, looks like you have had a crying spell.”

I replied, “I had a rare dream about Charles and our life together. Every time I have one of those dreams I can count on a few shedding tears to follow.”

Bryntley replied, “I am sorry, it must be really hard to lose one so close to you.”

I said, “It is hard but I get better at managing it every day. So why are you still up?”

Bryntley said, “I get this way toward the end of a case. It is an occupational thing. I get close to the people I protect and to be honest it is hard to let go and move on, although I know I must.”

I replied, “I am glad you get close, it makes you more human. Moving on is always hard. I had to do that with Charles although it wasn’t planned. He was stolen from me. I better go back to bed. Court will be trying tomorrow, without adding memories of Charles to the equation.”

I was restless and tossed and turned the whole night. I got about an hour’s sleep if you added all of the little mini naps that filled my night. I heard Todd and Bryntley when they got up and I got up to join them.

Todd said, “You look as tired as you did last night. Did you get any sleep?”

I replied, “I think I got an hour. It was a restless night.”

Todd asked, “Were you nervous about the hearing today?”

I answered, “No, it was a personal matter, nothing anyone can help me with.”

Bryntley told Todd, “She had a dream about her deceased husband. Stop asking questions and let's get everything ready for Susan and her family to move out as soon as the trial is over.”

I hadn’t thought about it much but it would be on my mind now that I heard it uttered out of someone’s mouth. I would be leaving my protections soon and moving on with my life.  

Todd said, “This is an arraignment, not a trial. They will ask the defendant about his plea and then they will set bail and we will all go home.”

Todd and I went to the courthouse together while my mother and Lincoln stayed behind at the house. We were expecting something short and to the point. That was what Todd told me but I had no clue how this kind of thing would work. It was only a matter of minutes now before I got my answer.

There was a line of people coming into the building. I watched everyone walk through the metal detector while the guard examined each person. It helped us when Todd held his badge up to show the guard and he waved us on through. I guess it was professional courtesy. 

I was nervous and just followed Todd’s lead. He walked into the courtroom and I followed right behind. Seeing the metal detector at the entrance made me wonder how the victim’s father ever got a weapon into the building. I guess maybe that would be disclosed at trial.