Chapter 56 Red Lights

Chapter 56 Red Lights
SOFIA'S POV

For once, I don't think about my lungs.

I don't think about my medication.

I don't think about my father.

And I definitely don't think about Nova.

The music takes over.

Mila catches sight of me and immediately joins, grabbing my hands and spinning me around.

I laugh.

A real one.

The kind that doesn't feel forced.

When I turn again, Fiorella is still watching.

Except this time she's smiling.

Not teasing.

Just...watching.

I raise an eyebrow at her.

She lifts her bottle in response.

I roll my eyes and keep dancing.

Maybe she was wrong.

Maybe this is my scene.

The song changes.

Mila disappears into the crowd with the guy she'd been dancing with, leaving me alone for a moment.

I don't mind.

I'm actually enjoying myself.

Until a shadow falls beside me.

"You're not as boring as you look."

I turn.

Fiorella.

"I don't look boring."

"You look like someone who has a five-year plan."

I laugh.

"That's insulting."

"It's an observation."

She takes a sip from her bottle.

"So what's your plan tonight?"

"Survive my friends."

She smiles.

"That's it?"

"Maybe."

Her eyes linger on mine.

"Maybe?"

I shrug.

"Maybe I'm allowed to have a night where I don't know what's happening next."

Something shifts in her expression.

"That's a dangerous thing to admit around me."

"Why?"

"Because I like spontaneous."

I smile despite myself.

"Then you're going to be disappointed."

"Why?"

"Because I'm cautious."

She steps slightly closer.

"You're here, aren't you?"

I don't have an answer for that.

She smiles like she knows she won.

Then she walks past me.

I turn to watch her leave.

And immediately hate myself for doing it.

Because that little flutter in my chest?

I recognize it.

It's attraction.

And for the first time in months, it doesn't hurt.

It doesn't come with a lie.

It doesn't come with a dare.

It doesn't come with someone else's expectations.

It's just...

A girl.

Looking at me.

And me wanting her to look again.

This time instead of waiting for her to find me again, I follow the direction she went in.

I find her bu the edge of the boat seated with her feet dipped in the ocean.

A few girls surround her laughing a little to hard at something she must have said.

Even I know its fake because Gio mentioned her being blunt. 

No one is that blunt and funny. Offensive maybe....but not funy.

"Who are you? I don't think I've seen you at my parties before." A girl walks past me to the group holding two glasses of cocktails.

By the way the girls immediately straighten up I can tell she holds power.

Fiorella looks in my direction with a smirk forming across her lips. 

"She's with me." She gets up from where she was seated and walks over to me.

I don't think I can survive another Delia situation.

The girl's face softens instantly like thats all it took to disarm her.

"Didn't know my sister had a type. Usually sh-"

"And I didn't ask you to talk about my business." Fiorella retorts guiding me away from that section of the boat.

I think the only part I haven't had a chance to see is outside it.

She leads me to yet another part of the large party boat. 

Then takes off her olive green linen pants. 

Her unbuttoned linen shirt follows displaying her perfcetly tied bikini top. 

"What are you doing?"

She chuckles.

That's a first.

"Going for a swim, obviously." She jumps into the water casually like shes used to this kind of thing. 

I lean over the boat watching clear water before she emerges.

Something about that felt...influencing.

I look over my body rememering I only put on the bikini top not bottoms.

Then without thinking I take my skirt off before jumping into the water. 

I haven't swam in the ocean in a while. 

"Is this spontaneous enough for you?" I ask swimming over to her.

She nods approvingly under the moonlight.

"Thats one sexy pair of bottoms."

"underwear you mean."

She laughs. 

I laugh too. 

Who'd have thought Sofia would be doing stuff like this on a random summer night?

We swim in circles before I feel my lungs strain my breathing a little.

She catches that.

I feel her hand snake around my waist helping me swim to the part of the boat we jumped off from.

She gets a towel surprising me at how easy it was for her to get one. 

I put my skirt back on before drying myself up with the towel.

She gets dressed herself taking a seat across from me, watching.

"Do I have something on my face?" I pat my face cautiously.

"No. Your features are...beautiful."

"I bet girls fall for you at this step."

She shakes her head lazily.

"They usually fall after Gio's introduction." 

I blink.

So why is she still flirting with me then?

"You're attractive, but...not easy for you attractive."

She bites her bottom lip this time.

"I never said I was."

My mouth curves into a smile.

Her eyes lock with mine, neither of us wanting to break it.

Then I hear my name being called from somewhere on the boat. 

As if thats not attention seeking enough its my full name.

"Sofia Vescovi!!!" Paolo's voice calls out as I walk to where its coming from.

"Good God I thought something happened to you."

"Not yet but keep exposing my identity like that and something might."

He narrows his eyes, examining me.

I didn't drink if that's what hes worried about. 

"What?"

"We need to go, it's....late." He's voice wavers.

He's hiding something.

I don't miss the hicky on his neck. 

He didn't have one before.

"Actually id like to stay. You were right...this is fun."

He hesitates before speaking.

"Sof-" 

A song blasts interrupting him.

Mila appears from nowhere pulling us both to the middle to dance with the rest.

Her mascara looks abit smudged but looks like part of the look under this lighting.

Did they both just get laid at a party?

Paolo lets loose and I follow feeling a pair of arms rest on my sides before my body is pulled against the person. 

I turn my head and immediately relax at the familir face.

Fiorella's face.

This time the dancing feels more than it should. 

Theres nothing innocent about how respectful her hands are, yet touch all the right places.

I turn my whole body to face her.

She leans into my ear, pushing my hair back from my ear.

Her hot breath fans my ear.

"I might have been wrong about you!" She shouts over the music.

She pulls away now looking into my eyes....then they move to my lips. 

My hands cup her face pulling it down to me.

Our noses touch.

Then she makes the final move closing the distance between us. 

Our lips move in sync.

Her hand dig into the back of my hair while the other one holds onto my waist firmly.

When we pull apart I'm already gasping for air. 

That was the most intense kiss I've ever had.

My eye catches something past her shoulder. 

A face so familiar my heart stops for a second.

I blink.

Once.

Twice.

Nova.

She's holding onto a glass, her face holding an expression I know all to well.

Thats how I looked at her when I found out about the dare. 

Neither of us moves, then a girl brushes her arm then pulls her away.

I should be running after...

Explain the situation.

But I don't.

Instead I look over to my two bestfriends.

Mila is just as shocked as I am but Paolo?

He just stands there like it was his fault.

Is that what he was trying to tell me earlier?

"Is everything okay?" Fiorella asks looking between us three and Mila reassures her before pulling me away to the exit.

I look back to her just standing there.

I should feel bad.

Feel like we're even now...but the truth?

I felt relieved that I knew fiorellas intention before I let the kiss happen.

Then I saw Nova.

And the look she gave me.

Like she finally understood what it was like to watch someone choose someone else.

"I should have insisted on leaving."

"Paolo.." Mila says with a drained voice as we walk to the car.

He doesn't answer immediately.

He keeps looking back at the boat.

At the place where Nova disappeared.

"Can we keep this between us?"

I stop walking.

"Why?"

Paolo finally looks at me.

"Because I don't think you realize what just happened."

My stomach twists.

"I kissed someone."

"No."

He shakes his head.

"You kissed someone while Nova was standing right there."

"I didn't know she was there."

"I know."

His voice softens.

"That's what makes it worse."

I look away.

The memory of Nova's face flashes through my mind again.

That expression.

That awful, hollow look.

The same one I'd seen in the mirror after discovering the dare.

For a while, I'd wondered if she understood what she'd done to me.

Tonight...

I think she finally did.

And somehow, that doesn't make me feel better.

It makes me feel sick.

Because I don't regret kissing Fiorella.

That's the part I can't explain.

I liked it.

I liked her.

And for the first time since Nova, being attracted to someone didn't feel like betraying anyone.

But seeing Nova?

That hurt.

Not because I still belonged to her.

I didn't.

But because for one horrible second, I understood exactly what she'd just felt.

And I hated that I understood it.

Damiano opens the car door.

I climb inside without saying another word.

Mila gets in beside me.

Paolo takes the front seat.

The doors shut.

Nobody speaks.

Then my phone vibrates.

I already know who it is.

I don't look.

Not this time.

I stare through the window as the beach disappears behind us.

Fiorella's kiss is still on my lips.

Nova's face is still in my head.

And somewhere between the two...

I don't know who I'm supposed to feel guilty for.