Chapter 20

"Yes, Mother, I know... On Friday, Mother... I know... Goodbye." Johnny's voice wakes me up as he talks on the phone, with his back turned to me, looking out the window.

When he turns around, his gaze connects with mine, and he smiles half-heartedly, sending shivers down my spine.

God! That was my favorite smile of his.

"How are you?" he asks in a soft voice, making it impossible to simulate the hint of sadness in his voice.

"Fine," I suppress the urge to ask why he's in such good spirits. "Did you feed the baby?" He smiles, looking towards the crib.

"You know, we can't keep calling her that," I furrowed my eyebrows. "Little one, baby... with adjectives, you understand?" I smile and nod.

"I was thinking of naming her Luciana..."

"No, I want to choose her name," he requests, and I think about it for a moment before agreeing. "Harley," he says without hesitation as if he had been thinking about it for a long time.

Truth be told, it's a very nice name, Harley Smith; I like it.

I smile at him, letting him know my opinion, and nod, making him smile too.

"I love it, Harley," I savor the name, "that's what she'll be called," I confirm aloud and smile happily.

"Harley Smith Mason," he pronounces the full name with a contagious smile.

"Ma'am, your sister is on the phone," Luna appears in the doorway of my room, which remains open.

My eyes widen as I realize that I have forgotten that little detail.

"Oh, God! I haven't told my family!" I exclaim in an exasperated whisper to Johnny.

"Please, don't tell them. At least not now," I look at him confused. "If you do, they'll want to come right away, and I want to spend this week with... my daughter." His gaze is pleading, and it prevents me from refusing, leading me to nod and murmur, "Okay."

Luna hands me the phone, and I place it against my ear.

"Hello?" I greet.

"How are you, Laura?" she asks, and my nerves grow.

"Good, Lia, why?" I laugh, and I relax a little.

"Because you've just entered your last month of pregnancy, silly. Your daughter will be born at the end of April," if she only knew... the end of April was the date Claudia had scheduled for the birth of my girl, but things didn't go as expected.

"Yes, I know. How is Sophia?" I ask, avoiding the topic. And we start talking about trivial things until we hang up.

Johnny is in the hallway, taking a call amidst whispers. I need to go to the bathroom, but I feel like if I set foot on the floor, I'll bump into him. I have no choice but to ask him for help.

"Johnny," I call him, and he immediately appears at the door with the phone glued to his ear. "I need to go to the bathroom, and I need your help," I murmur.

"Goodbye, Irina, we'll talk later..." he says into the phone, and I can't help but feel a little annoyed. Why? I don't know.

He approaches me, and gently takes me by the waist, and my feet don't touch the floor because of how tall he is. He doesn't need to carry me, but I say nothing. He enters the bathroom with me in his arms and only stops when we stand in front of the toilet.

"Can you manage on your own?" he asks, and his breath hits my face.

"I feel like I'll fall when I touch the floor. I'm a bit dizzy, and my whole body hurts," I whisper, and he nods. He lowers his other arm, the one that wasn't holding me, and with his fingers, he grabs the hem of my sleep shorts to slowly pull them down. "Don't look," I say seriously.

"I'm not looking," he whispers, not taking his eyes off mine. Once he finishes pulling down my shorts and underwear, I sit on the toilet, without breaking eye contact with him. The cry of my little one interrupts our bubble, and he leaves, closing the door behind him.

The urge to take a shower takes over me, but I won't ask him for help with that.

"Done?" he asks behind the door after a while.

"Can you tell Luna to come, please?" is my reply.

"Are you okay?" he asks again.

"Yes, I just want to shower, Jhonny," I respond wearily.

"Alright... but who is Luna?" he sighs and shakes his head.

It can't be that after all this time coming to this house, he still doesn't know the name of the cleaning lady.

"The lady who brought me the phone earlier, Jhonny." He murmurs, "Ah, okay," and then I feel the bedroom door opening.

A few minutes later, Luna knocks on the bathroom door and then enters. She helps me undress and shower carefully, then goes out to the room and brings a pajama set and underwear. She helps me put on the clothes and then helps me out of the bathroom.

Upon returning to the room, I see Johnny with my baby in his arms. He looks at her and strokes her cheeks with his fingers until he realizes our presence and walks toward us. He takes me by the waist again and leads me to the bed.

"I'll bring you lunch in a moment," Luna announces and leaves, closing the door to the room behind her.

"What time is it? Why was my baby crying?" I ask, and he sits on the other side of the bed, leaning his back against the headboard.

"It's two-thirty in the afternoon, and our baby was crying because she had a dirty diaper," he emphasizes the word "our," but I decide to ignore it.

"Did you change her diaper?" He nods. "Do you know how to change diapers?"

"Your employee helped me do it, the one who said she had done all the work," he says with a mocking smile, still not taking his eyes off the baby.

"Can you hand her to me?" he looks at me with a furrowed brow, and then he carefully places Harley in my arms, it's the second time I've held my daughter, and I love having her.

...

It's eight-fifty in the evening, Johnny and I have spent the whole day in the room until about an hour ago when he left, saying he was going to get some clothes from his apartment and would be back soon.

Harley has been crying since he left, and we have done everything, Luna, Karla, Merci, and I, to calm her down, but nothing works. According to Luna, it's because, in the short time, she's been alive, she has already gotten used to Johnny's arms, and how could she not? He has spent the whole day with her in his arms.

"What's going on?" Johnny asks, startling all of us with his unexpected arrival. We didn't even hear when he opened the door. "Why is the baby crying?" he asks again, walking towards me as I try to calm her.

He has a black bag over his shoulder and drops it on the floor to take Harley from my arms. As soon as she feels herself in her father's arms again, she slowly stops crying.

"I told you, ma'am, little Harley is used to the gentleman's arms," Luna reiterates, making me divert my gaze from my daughter, whose cheeks are reddened from crying, to look at her.

Somehow, I have to break that habit. Johnny won't be with us all the time.