Chapter157 You're going to be the death of me

Chapter157 You're going to be the death of me
Chloe

"Yes, you look almost identical, but the way she moves through the world, the way she thinks about her work, her values—they're completely her own. When she talked about those kids she works with, the passion in her voice... it wasn't anything I'd ever seen in you. Not because you're not passionate," he added quickly, "but because it's a different kind of passion. A different kind of heart."

I felt something tight in my chest begin to loosen, but I pressed on. "And your feelings for me? What about those?"

Ethan's smile was sad but somehow peaceful. "They're still there. I'd be lying if I said they weren't. But Chloe, I've been carrying this torch for so long that I'd forgotten what it felt like to be interested in someone new. Someone who could actually be interested in me back."

The honesty of his admission hit me harder than I'd expected. "So you think you could... move forward? With Kim?"

"I think I'd like to try." He leaned back in his chair, and for the first time in our conversation, he looked genuinely relaxed. "If she'll have me, knowing what she knows now about my history."

I nodded, though something in my chest still felt unsettled. The rational part of me was relieved—this was exactly what I'd hoped to hear. But there was another part, a selfish part, that felt strangely bereft at the thought of Ethan finally, truly moving on.

"There's something else," I said, forcing myself to continue. "If you and Kim do... if this develops into something serious, it's going to change things between all of us. The dynamic we've had for so long."

"I know." His voice was gentle. "Are you okay with that?"

The question caught me off guard. Was I okay with it? The idea of watching Ethan fall in love with someone who looked exactly like me, of seeing him build a life with my sister while I remained married to Julian... it felt surreal and somehow painful in ways I couldn't quite articulate.

"I want you to be happy," I said finally, and I meant it, even if the full truth was more complicated. "Both of you. I just... I need time to adjust to the idea."

Ethan reached across the table and covered one of my hands with his. The touch felt gentler now, stripped of the old tension that had always simmered beneath the surface between us. "We'll take it slow. And if it becomes too weird, if it makes you uncomfortable, just tell me. Kim's important to you, and I won't do anything to jeopardize that relationship."

"She's still processing everything," I said carefully. "But she hasn't closed the door completely. I think... I think she might be willing to see where this goes, if you're patient with her."

I squeezed his hand gratefully. "Thank you. For understanding. And for being honest with me."

He stood to leave, pausing at the edge of the terrace. "Chloe? For what it's worth, I think you did the right thing. Telling Kim about my feelings. It wouldn't have been fair to let her invest in something without knowing the full story."

After he left, I remained on the terrace, staring out at the perfectly manicured garden Julian had planted for me. My hand drifted unconsciously to my still-flat stomach, where our child was growing.

So much was changing, so quickly. Ethan moving on, Kim entering our lives, this baby on the way.

I thought about Julian's words from the night before: What if it works out?

Maybe he was right. Maybe I was borrowing trouble, catastrophizing instead of allowing the people I cared about to find their own happiness.

Julian returned home. Heavy, purposeful strides that quickened when he spotted me on the terrace.

Even after all these months of marriage, my pulse still jumped at the sight of him—today he'd loosened his tie and rolled up his sleeves, dark hair slightly mussed from running his fingers through it, a habit I'd learned meant he'd had a particularly intense day at the office.

"You look like you're carrying the weight of the world," he observed, settling beside me on the lounge chair and immediately pulling me against his side. His fingers found the tension in my shoulders, working at the knots there with practiced ease. "Talk to me. How did it go with Ethan?"

"Better than I expected," I admitted, letting myself melt into his warmth and the steady rhythm of his hands on my shoulders. "I think... I think Ethan really is ready to move forward. His feelings for Kim seem genuine."

After a moment, Julian shifted me in his lap, one hand threading through my hair while the other settled protectively on my hip. "And how do you feel about that?"

I considered the question seriously, acutely aware of how his thumb had begun tracing on my hip bone through the thin fabric of my sundress. "Relieved. Grateful. And maybe a little sad, which probably makes me a terrible person."

His laugh was low and understanding, the sound rumbling through his chest where my cheek rested. "It makes you human. Ethan's been devoted to you for years. It's natural to feel some loss when that devotion shifts elsewhere, even when you want it to shift."

His hand moved from my hair to cup my face, thumb brushing across my cheekbone with a tenderness that still caught me off guard sometimes.

"I just hope I haven't made things harder for them by telling Kim the truth."

"You gave her the information she needed to make an informed choice. That's what sisters do." His hand found mine, intertwining our fingers and bringing them to his lips to press a soft kiss to my knuckles. The gesture was casual, automatic, but it sent warmth shooting up my arm. "Speaking of which, how are you feeling? Any more cramping?"

"No, everything feels normal." I turned to look at him properly, studying the lines of concern around his eyes, the way his jaw tightened slightly when he was worried. "You don't need to worry about every little thing, Julian. The doctor said everything was fine."

Instead of answering immediately, he shifted me more fully into his lap, one hand sliding to rest against my abdomen while the other cupped the back of my neck with achingly tender reverence.

The movement brought us closer together, close enough that I could see the flecks of gold in his dark eyes, could feel his breath warm against my lips.

"I'll stop worrying when this baby is safely in our arms," he said firmly, his voice rougher now, deeper. "And probably not even then."

The intensity in his gaze made my breath catch, and I found myself studying the way the late afternoon light played across his features, highlighting the sharp line of his jaw and the slight stubble that had appeared since this morning. His thumb traced along my jawline, and I felt him inhale sharply when I unconsciously leaned into his touch.

"Chloe," he murmured, my name like a prayer on his lips. His hand moved higher, fingers spreading with fierce protectiveness across my ribcage just below my breast. "Do you have any idea what you do to me?"

The question was barely above a whisper, but it sent heat pooling low in my belly. "Julian..."

"Just sitting here with you like this," he continued, his control clearly fraying at the edges. "Knowing you're carrying my child, knowing you're mine..." His fingers tightened on my neck with desperate intensity, not quite pulling me closer but making his intentions clear. "I can barely think straight."

I could feel the evidence of his words pressed against my hip where I sat across his lap, could see the way his pupils had dilated, the slight flush across his cheekbones.

"We should go inside," I managed to say, though I made no move to get up.

"We should," he agreed, but instead of moving, his hand slid to my thigh, fingers tracing patterns on my bare skin where my dress had ridden up. "In a minute."

His lips found the sensitive spot just below my ear, and I couldn't suppress the small sound that escaped me.

"You're going to be the death of me," he murmured against my skin, his voice strained with barely controlled desire. "Sometimes I look at you and I forget how to breathe."