Chapter 35 Just A Push
Sienna
I didn’t know what to say.
Usually, when I heard some messed-up abuse story from a random at a bar, I’d just shrug and offer a shallow "that sucks" before ordering another round to wash away the discomfort. I never actually thought I’d meet someone who lived it.
Especially not someone as powerful as Sev. It made my head spin trying to connect the dots—how the untouchable Alpha I knew, became so twisted because of what happened to him as a kid.
"Um..." I tried to find the words to comment on what Tristan had just dropped on me. But my brain was stuck.
Abused? By his mother? In what way? Was he hit? Was he... I shook my head, cutting the thought off before the images got too vivid.
"Thank you, Tristan," I finally said. He just gave me a solemn, knowing nod.
"What is your plan?" he asked, looking at me with a weird, tired sort of respect.
"Speak with Sev, obviously," I replied, raising an eyebrow. My voice was still a bit scratchy, but the edge was back.
Tristan let out a short, surprised chuckle. "Of course. I truly do admire you, Sienna. You've got more balls than half the pack."
I looked at him, totally grossed out by the sudden shift. "You’re married, Tristan."
"Never too late for a mistress," he said, giving me a cheeky wink.
"Yves!" I barked, knowing that name was the only thing that could keep him in line.
"Hey, it’s a joke! It’s a joke!" He started looking from left to right frantically. "Don’t call her name out like that, she might actually show up and I’m not wearing my protective gear."
He heaved a sigh, his playfulness evaporating instantly. He turned serious. "It’s just that... everyone looks up to Sev as an Alpha and as a man, but not as a person. They want him because of the title he carries, and because he’s a damn fine specimen to look at. But he’s a good person, Sienna. He’s more than just a boss to me; he’s a brother. Don't break what's left of him."
I softened, the anger in my chest cooling into something like resolve. "I know."
I excused myself and started the hunt. I checked his office. Empty. I checked the library. Nothing.
Finally, I realized there was only one place left to look. I wrapped my hand around the heavy knob and gently twisted it. It wasn't even locked.
When I pushed it open, I saw him. He was slumped on one of the sofas, his head rested on the cushions, staring at the ceiling. He looked smaller somehow. He didn't even notice I’d entered until the door clicked shut.
"Have you been hiding in here for the past few days?" I asked, walking toward him. My heart was thumping against my ribs.
He practically jumped in shock, his body jerking as he bolted upright. His eyes were wide, darting toward me like I was a ghost. "S-Sienna," he breathed out, his voice cracking in a way I’d never heard before.
I couldn't believe it. This was the mighty Sebastian, and here he was, looking nervous and shaking just because I walked into the room.
"I asked if you were here for days," I repeated, sitting beside him. I felt him shift away immediately, trying to keep a polite distance, his back going as straight as a board.
"No. Only today," he replied.
I nodded, watching the way his hands were clenched into white-knuckled fists on his knees. "And the past few days? Where were you?”
"You are not here for small talk, Sienna."
I forced a smile, keeping my temper on a tight leash. My throat still ached when I spoke too fast. "Yes, Sebastian. I was actually waiting for you to apologize before I asked my next question, but it looks like you don't have any plans to do that at all. You were just going to sit here and stare at the ceiling until I disappeared, weren't you?"
He didn't reply. The silence engulfed us until I started tapping my foot with impatience. Look, I felt for him—I really did—but that didn't mean his past should bring this much pain to the people around him. Being a victim didn't give him a license to be a monster to me.
"Sev," I said, standing up so I could look him in the eye. "Are you ready to speak? Because I’m right here, and I’m ready to listen. I’m not going anywhere."
He clenched his jaw, his muscles rippling under the skin. He massaged his temples before running a frustrated hand through his dark hair, ruining the perfect styling.
"You wish for me to apologize for almost taking your life?" he asked, letting out a sharp, bitter scoff.
I was about to snap at him, to tell him that a "sorry" was the bare minimum, but then he continued.
"Because it would not be enough, Sienna. A thousand apologies would not mend the fact that I hurt you. I looked at you and I didn't see you. I saw..." He trailed off, the pain in his expression becoming too much. He hid his face in his palms.
I didn't think. I knelt on the floor between his knees and held his hands, pulling them away from his face. I pressed one of his large, cold palms against my cheek, forcing him to feel the warmth of my skin.
"Sev, I’m not a very understanding or patient person. I’m a brat, I’m loud, and I’m stubborn," I whispered. "But I’m trying. I’m trying so hard because it’s you. Don't you think I deserve to know why? Don't you have even the slightest bit of affection for me? Or was I just a distraction?"
I closed my eyes, leaning into the heat of his hand. For a long, terrifying moment, he didn't move. Then, I felt it. His thumb brushed against my skin, tracing the line of my jaw where the bruises were finally starting to fade into a dull yellow. I opened my eyes and saw it—that tiny, desperate spark of care he tried so hard to bury.
"I am sorry, Sienna. For causing you such pain," he said softly, his voice trembling. "I wish to promise it will never happen again, I truly do... but she is haunting me. Every corner of this house, every shadow... she is here. And when you said those words... it was like she was you."
"Then let me understand," I said. "Please.”
He looked at me for a long time, his melancholic eyes searching mine for any sign of fear. When he found only stubborn love, he let out a heavy, defeated sigh.
"You are not going to let this go, are you?"
I couldn't help but chuckle through the tears threatening to fall. "Funny. Tristan asked me the exact same thing. And I’ll tell you what I told him: when have I ever let anything go? Especially when it comes to what I want."
He chuckled slightly, a ghost of a sound that didn't reach his eyes. "Very well. Sit with me, then.”