Chapter 83 Kaden's POV
I slammed my office door hard enough to rattle the frame.
Damian stood in the middle of the room, his chest still heaving, his hands clenched into fists. Blood stained his knuckles Xavier's blood.
"What the hell was that?" I demanded.
"That was between Xavier and me."
"That was you attacking an Alpha in my pack house! An allied Alpha! Do you have any idea what you just did?"
"I know exactly what I did."
A growl rumbled in my chest. My wolf was pushing forward, responding to the blatant disrespect. "Xavier is an important guest. He saved Elara's life. He formed an alliance with us when other packs were questioning our stability. And you repay that by putting claws to his throat?"
"You don't understand the history-"
"I don't care about history! Whatever happens between you two, you settle it privately. You don't attack him in my pack house where anyone could see!"
Damian's jaw clenched. "He's not who you think he is."
"He's an Alpha who's shown us nothing but support. That's who he is to me."
I moved closer, letting my Alpha authority bleed into my voice. "You will treat him with respect. You will apologize for attacking him. And you will settle whatever issues you have like adults instead of feral wolves."
"I'm not apologizing."
"That wasn't a request, Damian that was an order."
"I don't take orders when it comes to him."
We stood there staring at each other. The tension was suffocating.
"Why are you being so stubborn about this?" I asked. "What did he do that's so terrible you can't let it go?"
Damian looked away. "It's complicated."
"Then uncomplicate it because right now, you are putting me in an impossible position. Xavier is my ally. You're my pack's doctor and someone I consider a friend. But if you can't control yourself around him, one of you has to leave."
"Then he leaves."
"He is an Alpha, he has every right to be here. You are the one who attacked him."
I ran my hand through my hair, frustrated. "I'm trying to understand, Damian. Really trying. But you are not giving me anything to work with."
"Because some things can't be explained. Some things just are."
"That's not good enough."
"It's going to have to be."
Before I could respond, a knock came at the door.
"What?" I called out, not taking my eyes off Damian.
Ethan entered, carrying a folder he took one look at the tension between us and paused. "Bad time?"
"Always had a bad time lately."
I gestured at Damian. "We are done here, get out. And stay away from Xavier until you can control yourself."
Damian's expression hardened but he didn't argue. He walked past Ethan and out the door without another word.
I sank into my chair, exhaustion hitting me all at once.
"That looked intense," Ethan said.
"It was. What do you need?"
"Defense system report for the celebration."
He opened the folder. "We've got the perimeter secured. Extra patrols on all borders guest lists verified security protocols for visiting Alphas are in place."
"Good. What about inside the pack house?"
"That's trickier. Selena's insisted on certain arrangements that make security difficult."
He pulled out a diagram. "She wants the main hall opened completely. No barriers says it looks more welcoming."
"Which means no controlled entry points."
"Exactly. I've pushed back but she keeps citing diplomatic protocol and proper hosting standards.'"
I looked at the diagram, seeing the vulnerabilities immediately. "She is either incompetent or she's creating security risks on purpose."
"My money's on the second option."
"Mine too." I marked several points on the diagram.
"Override her put security where it needs to be. If she complains, send her to me."
"Will do." Ethan hesitated. "How are you holding up? With everything?"
"I'm fine."
"You're not fine. You look exhausted. When's the last time you slept a full night?"
I tried to remember and couldn't. "A while."
"Kaden-"
"I'll sleep when this is all over. When Erebus is dealt with. When Selena is handled. When Elara is safe."
"That could be months from now."
"Then I will sleep in months."
Ethan looked like he wanted to argue but finally just nodded. "At least try to rest tonight. You're no good to anyone if you collapse from exhaustion."
After he left, I sat in my office for a long time, staring at the defense diagrams without really seeing them.
My mind kept drifting to Elara to the look on her face when Xavier had agreed to let Selena host the party. To how she'd stopped Damian from killing Xavier even though she was injured and exhausted.
She was stronger than anyone gave her credit for. Stronger than I had realized when I first rejected her.
The memory of that rejection still burned. The worst decision of my life. One I had been trying to fix ever since.
Finally, around midnight, I forced myself to go to bed. Sleep came reluctantly fitfully. And when it came, so did the nightmare.
I was running through the pack house. Something was wrong. I could feel it through the bond of terror, pain, desperation.
"Elara!" I was shouting her name but no sound came out.
I reached her quarters and the door was open. I ran inside. She was on the floor. In a pool of blood. So much blood.
"No." I dropped to my knees beside her. "No, no, no."
Her eyes were open but unfocused her hand pressed to her stomach. Blood seeping between her fingers.
"The baby," she whispered. "Kaden, the baby-"
"Hold on. Just hold on. Damian!" I was screaming for him but no one came.
"It's too late," Elara said. Her voice was fading. "You were too late again."
"I'm here now. I'm here. I've got you."
"Not enough." Her hand fell away from her stomach. "Never enough."
"Elara, please-"
But she was gone. Eyes staring at nothing. Body going limp in my arms. And I was alone with her corpse and the blood and the knowledge that I'd failed. Again.
I woke up screaming.
Actually screaming. My voice is raw. My body was drenched in sweat.
The nightmare clung to me even as consciousness returned. The image of Elara bleeding out. The baby lost. Both of them died because I wasn't fast enough, strong enough, good enough.
I sat there in the darkness, shaking, trying to convince myself it was just a dream.
But the fear remained cold and certain because that nightmare could become reality.