Chapter 42: I can't tell him

"Why do I want your body so much that it hurts so badly every time whenever you're near me and whenever you're not?" the alpha again inquires me as he remains to stare into my eyes, for an answer.

An answer that I could never give him, that I am his mate and that's why he was acting so crazy about me.

I couldn't tell him. I could never dare to do so; it is too dangerous. My answer to the question he was dying to know would not only put me in a dangerous situation but also my mom and now her lover, Dr. Charles.

I've already hurt my mom giving her a nasty ugly scar in trying to get to Mr. Bates under the full moon. I will never allow anymore hurt to her in telling Mr. Bates now that I was his one true mate and not his Luna Talia.

I stop staring at his bright blue eyes that were now slowly filling with tears. Tears dying to know why he was so attractive to me.

I couldn't look at him anymore. I turn my head away from his while tears too slowly begin to fill my dark brown eyes.

"I want my life back with my Luna!" the alpha begin to shout angrily while he shook my body.

My body jumps frighteningly, and I cry out.

"Everything was fine, my life with my pack and Luna and now you're making everything wrong for me!" he again shouts at me.

He pulls his hands away from me angrily. I cover my face with both palms of my hand weeping.

"I try hating you and even hurting you, but you just can't seem to get the fuck out of my mind Nala," the alpha again said angrily.

My body again jumps, and I quickly remove my hands away from my face that was now soaked by my tears as I heard a loud heavily sound, and there I saw the alpha removing his hand from the wall of the boarding house beside me.

He made a hole into the hard board wall with his bare right fist.

It was so terrifying seeing how powerful he was. I cry out to him right away.

"I don't know why I make you feel that way towards me," I lie to him.

He turns towards me with great anger within his eyes, while he begins to approach me.

I walk backward as he did while my eyes widened afraid of what he was going to do.

Seeing the hole, he made in the wall and hearing that all along the reason why he was hurting me was just to stop the bond that he was feeling towards me scares me. It made me believe that he was going to end it all now by getting rid of me now.

The thought scares me that instantly I found myself turning around and beginning to run clueless about where I was heading to.

I scream as I felt him hold my hand from behind and pull me back into the hallway. My body went into his hard chest as he did, and he held me from around my waist one-handedly.

"No, please don't do this, Mr. Bates," I begin to push him by his hard chest.

He shook me, wanting me to stop and I froze instantly obeying him. I fear him so badly.

We were now staring into each other eyes. My eyes were filled with fear and him with questions in his dark blue eyes, wanting to know why he had such a strong feeling towards me.

I again begin to fight my way from him. If I was going to die by my mate's bare hands I had now planned to with a fight. A fight I know that I will never win but at least I try, and the moon goddess could somehow feel sorry for me and find a way for me to escape from him before he ends my life now.

"Please give me back my life, Nala," I heard the alpha say so sadly to me.

I stop fighting my way free from him right away and return my stare to his eyes by what I heard him say.

"I want my life back where I was not miserable and love my Luna only," he again told me sadly.

I didn't know what to say, all I could do was just stare.

"Please Nala," the alpha begins to plead to me.

I lower my head now feeling so sorry for him for all the pain he was going through now. In his eyes, I could see that he wanted his life back so badly with his Luna Talia but appearing within his life had made things so complicated for him.

I too had now forgiven him for all the things he had put me through. I now knew that all along he was frightened and scared that his love for his Luna Talia, he was losing it for me, someone he barely knew, and it terrifies him for his love should only be with his Luna, his mate but sadly I was his rightful mate.

"Let me hate you," the alpha said. 

I remain to lower my head, clueless of what to say.

"Nala," I heard him call my name with great pain within his voice.

He was very desperate for me to help him.

"Take away this feeling from me, take away this great desire I have for your body," he told me.

"I hate hurting you, I don't want to hurt you anymore and I want my life back."

"How can I?" I answer him sadly as I raise my head.

"Help me take it away," the alpha told me as he stares into my eyes.

"How can I?" I again question him.

I was clueless about how I could do so.

The alpha pulls his head close to me that I could feel the heavy air rushing from his nose.

"Please tell me how can I?" I begin to plead to him nervously as to how close he was to me.

He got even closer than the tip of our nose touches.

I pull back my body nervous as hell.

My heart started to race within my chest as the alpha pull me back towards him, allowing our noses to touch each other again.

Soon our noses were pressing hard into each other and our mouths almost touch.

My body shiver by the hot air from not only from his nose but now his mouth as he parted them.

"I don't know how I can," I begin to cry to him as I lower my head, afraid of looking in his eyes too long.

"Let me show you to," the alpha inquires me with his rough voice.

I slowly raise my head staring back into his eyes at what he had said.

I was curious to know.

"How can I?" I inquire him curiously.

The alpha gently touches the right side of my face while he continues to stare into my eyes, ignoring my question.

My eyes then widen as I saw him moving his mouth closer to me. I push my head backward frighteningly. Swiftly he held my neck from behind and carry my head to his. Soon my lips were against his and his mouth was caressing mine hungrily as he moans by every kiss, he gave me.