Chapter 12: Chapter Eleven

After what feels like days, Raphas tells me that I have to speak to the Alpha. Dantes. I shrug my shoulders, "What if I don't want to?"

"That'll be considered disrespect, and disrespecting an Alpha is punishable by death."

I wipe my nose with the back of my hand. "Maybe death is preferable to this."

"Don't say that, Bea."

"Just leave me alone."

"You have to come with me. I'll throw you over my shoulder if I have to, Bea. It's not a request, it's a command."

Reluctantly, I stand. He attempts to help me, but I slap his hands away and a small growl escapes me. "Don't touch me." I'm still angry at him, and though I know my fury is irrational, I can't change the way I feel.

He trails behind me as I walk towards his uncle's cabin. The grounds are empty and I wonder where everyone is. I envision them all gathered around his cabin, awaiting my execution, Amanda watching with a smile as I'm hacked to pieces. I shudder and behind me, he does as well. "Stop that, Bea."

"It's not my fault that you're always trying to read my mind." I say this through gritted teeth. "Can't you give me some privacy?"

"I already told you. I don't read your mind, I simply feel everything you feel, especially powerful emotions."

"How come I don't feel what you feel?" I challenge. I turn to look at him and his face is grave.

"That's because I'm good at concealing emotions, Bea. I was born a werewolf. Being cautious is part of what keeps me alive."

We make it to his uncle's cabin and he tells me to go inside. "He wants to see only you. Amanda is in there, he'll question you both."

"Is that why you're not coming?" I cock my head to the side. "Because your little girlfriend is in there?"

"She is not my mate, no."

"That's not what she told me." I'm angry again and I feel like lunging at him. "So you just fuck her for fun? No strings attached?"

He glowers. "I did it for you. I did it to save you. Amanda is the only one with access to the food. Don't think I took pleasure in it. It nearly killed me."

I think of the dream I had in the early hours of the morning, and his anguished face. Without another word, I make my way inside. Amanda is sitting beside Dantes. They fall silent the moment I enter. I wonder what they were discussing. My execution, probably.

"Oh, Bea," Dantes begins. "You're one problematic wolf, aren't you?"

Amanda's face is clean now, and there are simply a few scratches on her face. I guess most of it healed. She's glaring at me and I glare back unabashedly. I don't care that Dantes is here, I can't stand her.

"I don't know what to do with you." He taps his chin. Thankfully, he's dressed today. He's wearing a pair of black shorts and a plain brown t-shirt. It's better than nothing at all. I don't answer him. I hope this ends quickly. I can't stand breathing the same air as that two-faced cow. She looks smug and victorious, so I assume she's not getting into trouble for this one. Just me, the problematic she wolf. The term is so ridiculous I nearly laugh out loud.

"You have attacked a fellow pack mate without any motive, is that correct?"

I shrug. "I'm not sure how your rules work."

"Fifty lashes. That's what you get for breaking this rule. Your pack is your family, and there will always be consequences when you endanger the life of a pack mate." He says all of this with a smile, like some sadist.

Fifty? The number makes my head spin. "You can't do that. You mean to beat me up like a slave? All because of this cynical bitch? She provoked me."

"Bragging about having sexual relations with another pack mate is not considered provocation." He grows serious. "You should learn to control your temper. Because you have not yet shifted, I will be more lenient. Twenty-five lashes. You may leave, I will give the order."

I didn't feel Raphas come up behind me. "Uncle."

"That is my final word, nephew." He turns his back to us. "I will say no more."

Amanda's smug look eviscerates when she sees Raphas. She sits up straight and her eyes sparkle at the sight of him.

My head is spinning and I feel like I will topple over at any second. Thankfully, Raphas takes a hold of me and I lean against him. Amanda's face falls. He starts to help me outside when his uncle says. "Tell Bernard to use the silver whip."

Raphas freezes and I feel his fear. No, I smell it. There's a difference. "Her offense is not so grave, uncle. The regular whip will do."

"You're right, it isn't grave. But perhaps it will teach her a lesson. She will think twice before losing her temper again." His eyes are bright and cruel in the dark. "In other words, the message will sink in."

Raphas takes me outside and when he turns to me, his eyes are glassy. My mouth is completely dry, but I manage to ask, "What's a silver whip?"

He doesn't answer me. He walks away and returns minutes later with a man I have not seen before. He's carrying a metallic whip and I recoil when I see it. It's instinctual and a whimper escapes me. Raphas looks away as the man grabs me and carries me to the nearest tree. He ties my hands with a length of rope and unfurls the whip. When it cracks against my back, a loud piercing scream escapes me. It's so loud it hurts my own ears. The pain is unlike anything I've felt before. It's a terrible burn and it feels like my back is ripping apart. He hits me again, and the second scream is louder than the first. I don't feel the rest. My vision grows blurry and I pass out.

The pain wakes me. It's blinding and agonizing. I'm in the cabin and I feel something wet on my back. I stir and Raphas shushes me. His face appears in front of mine, and there's blood covering the lower half of his face. "Go back to sleep, Bea." I do as I'm told and I close my eyes. It feels much like the first time, only this time the pain is worse. Sleep comes easily. I wake up again and the cabin is vacant. I don't feel his presence. I try to move but I feel a sharp pain and I lie still again. The ground is cold and unforgiving. I sleep again. And again. Every time I wake, it's like the pain worsens. I've lost complete track of time. I hear footfalls and Raphas enters the cabin. He stares down at me.

My throat is painful and irritated when I speak. "Days?" Is all I can ask.

He shakes his head. "It's been four hours."

Tears trail down the bridge of my nose and form a small puddle on the ground. He kneels beside me and brushes my tears away.

"It hurts."

"Bernard used a silver whip," he sounds furious. His voice is low and there are dark circles under his eyes. "Silver on a werewolf is fatal. It does to us what cyanide does to a human, but it's worse. Even touching silver can be deadly. The whip is coated with silver, it is not made entirely of it, which is why you aren't dead. But the pain is unimaginable and excruciating, and you heal slowly. A regular whip would not have the same effect, not even close."

I curl my fingers. "Your uncle wants me dead."

He clicks his tongue against his teeth. "I warned you, Bea. He's dangerous. You're always causing trouble. There was nothing I could do this time."

I shake my head, and something in my back tears. "You could have stopped him."

"I can't disrespect the Alpha. It's against our laws." He stares at my back and his eyes darken. "But I promise you this; what happened tonight will not happen ever again. I'll rip him apart, uncle or not. He will not mess with what is mine again."

I fall asleep for the fourth time and when I wake up, the sun is shining bright and Raphas is sitting right beside me. My wounds feel a little better and I can turn a little to my side. He offers me a bowl of broth, but I shake my head. If Amanda prepared it, I don't want anything to do with it. I'll starve if I have to.

"I asked Sylvia to make it for you." He assures me, and I reluctantly take a sip. It's delicious and he feeds me the entire bowl, and fetches more. I lay back down contentedly, but I cannot sleep. Raphas returns with a flask of cool water and I drink it all, too. Then he sits beside me and runs his hands through my hair. It's soothing and comforting and I lean closer to him.

After a while, my bladder feels heavy. I want to tell him, but at the same time I'm too embarrassed to do so. I try to sit up, but my back is searing and I lie back down.

"What is it?" He asks. "You need something, just tell me what it is."

I bite my lip. "I need to pee."

He shakes his head gravely. "You can't go anywhere in this condition. Where have you been going about your business?"

My face flushes. "The bushes."

He stands. "I'll need to find you a chamber pot," he declares and leaves. I'm so embarrassed I wish I could dig a hole and hide inside. He'll have to help me pee and wipe and I don't think I'm ready for that. I urge my body to heal faster. Please, I don't need this kind of humiliation.

But the hours pass and Raphas does not return, and I'm left wondering what has become of him. Where'd he go? Eventually the urge to pee passes, but my concern persists.

Where the hell is he?