Chapter 34 Chapter 34
“Tessa!” Anthony said, smiling like I hadn’t disappeared for months. “You look tired. Come in.” I stepped inside. The warmth that always lived in this apartment hit me like a punch. Soft music played. The smell of lavender drifted through the air. It was calm and peaceful the exact opposite of my life. I spent most of the morning helping Christine with light therapy and medication and walking her through a few mental exercises. She talked nonstop about the neighbors, her brother, and some fundraiser she didn’t want to attend. I let her talk. It was easier than thinking. By noon, she fell asleep in her recliner, and I slipped out into the hallway. The air felt cooler there. Too quiet.
“Are you alright?” Jax asked from behind me.
“No,” I answered honestly. “But when am I ever?”
We took the elevator down to the lobby. I wasn’t technically supposed to go anywhere alone anymore, but I needed food. Something comforting. Something warm. Something normal. “I’m going out to grab lunch,” I said.
Rob nodded. They followed. We walked past the marble floors, the gold accents, the polished tables the whole lobby screaming expensive misery and right as the doors opened to the street: Boom. The universe reminded me it hated me. Clarissa. Standing right freaking there. With Hannah, who had a fresh bruise blooming under one eye. Fucking fantastic. The moment their eyes locked on me, I swear the temperature dropped ten degrees.
You,” Clarissa hissed, stepping toward me. “Are you insane?! You actually hit us?”I didn’t have the patience. “You started it.”
Hannah scoffed. “You think you matter? You think you can touch me? You’re lucky I don’t press charges.”
“You grabbed me,” I shot back. “And I reacted. End of story.” Their perfect, manicured faces twisted up like spoiled kids getting told no for the first time. Before either of them could lunge again, a cold voice cut through the air behind us. “What did you do?”.....Zaiel.
He looked between us the two bruised blondes and me, an obvious magnet for disaster. His jaw ticked. “I swear, Tessa,” he muttered. “You’re chaos in human form.”
“Tell your family to stop touching me,” I fired back. “Tell them the truth. There is nothing between us. Nothing. I want nothing from you. I don’t need your pity, and I don’t need their delusions. I’m not part of whatever fucked-up reality you guys play in.” He held up a hand to shut Clarissa up. She actually listened. That alone shocked me.
“You’re bleeding,” he added, staring at my knuckles. I shoved my hands into my pockets. “Not your problem.” He exhaled slowly, long enough that I knew he was holding something back. “Go,” he said finally, voice tight.
I didn’t wait. I walked fast, let the cold city air hit my face, and let my pulse settle. Ten minutes later, I stepped into a small noodle place, the smell of broth making my stomach rumble. I ordered. Jax handed me the phone. I mentally cursed the universe. “Kai,” I said flatly into the receiver.
He didn’t yell, he didn’t growl, and he didn’t threaten. His voice was low, too steady. “You’re making this difficult, Beauty.”
“Good,” I snapped. “Life’s difficult. Deal with it.” A quiet pause. “Tessa,” he said slowly, “don’t push me.”
“Stop calling me,” I said, and hung up. I tossed the phone back at Jax. “Not my problem.” They didn’t comment. Smart.
We walked back in tense silence. My hands were trembling a little, but I pretended they weren’t. When I got back upstairs, I dropped the food on the counter and flopped onto the couch. I didn’t want to think. I didn’t want to feel. I didn’t want to exist. Sleep didn’t come that night. I think I drifted in and out, maybe got an hour total, but my brain never shut up long enough to rest. Every time I closed my eyes, I saw yellow roses. I smelled them. I saw Alex’s stupid grin. I heard Ryan telling me to disappear. I heard Kai’s voice, low and cold, threading into all the unreliable places in my head.
By the time the sun came up, I felt like a wrung-out rag. Still, I got up. Habit. Survival. The quiet, stubborn part of me that refused to stay down, even when everything in my body screamed at me not to move. I dressed quietly: clean jeans, a dark top, and a hoodie. Pulled my hair back. I didn’t bother with makeup. What was the point? I was going upstairs to take care of Christine, not walk a runway. When I stepped into the hallway, Jax and Rob were already there like two very committed shadows.
“Morning, boys,” I muttered, voice hoarse.
“Morning,” Jax said with an awkward kind of politeness he rarely used.
I walked to the elevator. I could tell they were analyzing me, reading my posture, breathing, and the nervous twitch in my fingers I kept trying to hide. I didn’t want anyone watching me right now. I barely wanted to watch myself. The elevator dinged on the 19th floor, and something inside me tightened. I made my way over and let myself in with the key Anthony gave me. I stepped inside and forced myself to match her smile. Christine didn’t deserve the storm rolling inside me. She didn’t know what I’d been dragged through. She didn’t know the tower was turning into a cage again.
“You look tired,” she said gently.
“Didn’t sleep well.”
She nodded like she understood more than she let on. “We’ll take it easy today.” She always had this calming presence, like she could slow down chaos just by breathing. It helped. More than I wanted to admit. I fell back into routine meds, small stretches, hydrating her, and gentle exercises. Anything that made her feel stronger. Anything that distracted me from feeling like the whole world had spun out of control again. Every so often, she’d ask a question.
“How was your trip?”
“Different,” I answered.
“Are you settling back in?”
“Trying.”
“Are you eating?”
“Sort of.”
Normal questions. Ones I didn’t know how to answer honestly, so I stuck to vague. By noon, she drifted off to sleep in her chair. I tucked a blanket around her shoulders and stared at her peaceful face for a moment. She deserved peace. Everyone deserved peace. I wasn’t sure I’d ever get it. As I stepped quietly into the hallway, Jax and Rob straightened from the wall. “You good?” Rob asked. I nodded. “Just need air.”
We took the elevator down. And the second the doors opened, the whispering started. Two women from the upper floors glanced at me, then at each other, then back at me. It wasn’t even subtle. Their eyes flicked from my bruised knuckles to the security guards flanking me like I was some kind of unpredictable bomb.
“Is that her?” one whispered.
“Yeah, that’s her,” the other murmured. “The caretaker who punched Rhyland’s fiancée.” For a full two seconds, I considered punching both of them too. Instead, I kept walking. I didn’t have the energy to deal with the entire tower’s gossip mill today.