CHAPTER 89
CHAPTER 89
Thursday August 20th
Gorgeous blue sky today.
Lovely big yellow sun.
I love my mum and dad. But they’re so LOUD.
‘Bob. BOB! I’m going into town. One or TWO PACKETS OF SAUSAGE ROLLS?’
‘SHIRLEY! WILL YOU KEEP YOUR VOICEDOWN!’
Mum only has to walk past my bedroom and Katy wakes up.
Dad tries a bit harder to be quiet. But in a way, he’s louder when he’s trying to be quiet. He does all this exaggerated, ‘SHHHUUUSSH! DAISY’S SLEEPING!’
Of course, Katy isn’t the easiest sleeper.
It takes half an hour of shushing and rocking and patting to get her dozing off. Then I gently lay her down in the cot. Take a few careful steps back like she’s a bomb that could go off. Careful … careful … don’t creak the floorboards …
And Mum’s voice will come bellowing up the stairs, ‘I’ve got TWO FROZEN PIZZAS! Bob? Shall I cook both of them?’
Still. It’s nice being home.
It’s especially nice not having Helen walk in at any moment.
But I do need a place of my own.
I just don’t want to live alone?. Katy doesn’t really count as other people. I mean, she’s lovely. But she can’t tell the difference between carpet fluff and food. It’s not like we have long conversations.
She does make me laugh though. ?
Friday August 21st
Went running today and did four miles!
Amazing!
Even though I haven’t trained for ages.
I can’t believe it.
I mean, fair enough, it took nearly an hour to run those four miles. But I didn’t stop or anything. I just kept running and running.
Saturday August 22nd
Took Callum out for a walk today.
How does anyone cope with two kids?
The second we got to the woodland path, Callum hurtled off towards the lake.
I ran after him, stroller bumping over sticks and mud, shouting, ‘Callum! Callum! You’ll ruin your flashing trainers!’
Before I knew it, he’d jumped in the lake.
He splashed around shouting, ‘Aye, Aye Captain Birdseye!’
I shouted at him to get out.
Then I offered him a biscuit.
He said, ‘I want a Magnum Chocolate Infinity.’
(How has he even HEARD about those? I blame Mum.)
Thank God an old man with a fishing rod shouted, ‘Come on out now sonny and I’ll show you my fishing line and maggots.’
Callum loves anything disgusting.
The man showed Callum a patch of daisies too, and picked one for him to take home.
Callum seemed quite interested in the daisy. But as we walked back through the woods he said, ‘That flower tasted horrible, Aunty Julesy.’
How am I going to cope when Katy can run around?
Sunday August 23rd
Very, very weird day.
Sadie came round the pub.
Brandi opened the door and screamed at her to ‘FUCK OFF AND DIE’.
But I said she could come in.
Sadie was SO nervous. Shaking, actually.
Mum took Brandi, Callum and Katy out into the garden.
The pub was pretty empty, so Sadie and I grabbed a corner booth.
Sadie started gabbling and crying, ‘I’m so, so sorry. I know I’ve fucked up. I’ve ruined everything. I love you more than anything in the world. You’re the only one who ever accepted me. My only true friend. And I did this to you. I know I’m a massive selfish bitch. But all that’s going to change. I promise you. I’m having a baby. A baby!’ Her eyes were all crazy. ‘I need you in my life, Jules. I can’t do this alone.’
I said, ‘You’re living with Nick aren’t you? Won't he be in your life?’
She said, ‘But I need adult support.’
Then she said things with Nick weren’t going well because he didn’t pay any bills or flush the toilet.
I told her she and Nick deserved each other.
She said, ‘I’m not that bad, am I?’
Then she went on about how her boyfriends always fancied me and it had been nice for once that it was the other way around.