Chapter 44: The Pawn

The mansion was always quiet, but tonight... it felt almost like a graveyard. There was not a single bit of life, even though Sin was sitting right behind me.

I slowly turned to him, my lips parting from the breathlessness of crying so hard earlier. He was facing the window, his head thrown back, his hair falling over the back of the rocking chair, a single cigarette smoke rising above his left hand.

I closed my eyes tight and swallowed, then slowly walked towards the closet. All of the dresses I had gotten were now carefully arranged, just like the maids had done for Angel's room.

Thinking about Angel saddened me, and I wondered how Sin would feel. He didn't look like the type to show his feelings, to have his heart on his sleeve, but I knew it must hurt somewhere down there.

I changed from the robe and slowly walked back out. He was still in the rocking chair, facing the now dim lights of the day.

"What are we going to do now?" I asked him slowly, carefully.

He didn't move for a long while, and I slowly moved towards the chair, my brows slightly furrowed.

"Sin?"

There was still no answer, and I walked to him and turned to face him, my eyes taking him in. He was asleep, and I should have been able to tell by the way the cigarette was lightly dangling in his hand.

His eyes were closed, and there was no indication of the storm that had come just hours ago, in the form of his ex-wife, and had taken the only person whom he visibly loved away from him.

I wasn't aware that Angel had left with Larissa, and even though Larissa appeared to give the crying girl a choice, it was quite crystal clear. She would choose Larissa. Larissa was the one Angel missed the most.

And Sin... Sin was left behind once more.

I slowly leaned to him, one hand on my knee to support me, the other resting gently on the armrest of the chair, my eyes darting solely across his closed ones.

He wasn't the kind that softened when you looked at him up close, and if I were to be honest, he seemed a lot harder to break through from up close.

I moved a little closer to see if I could find the softness in him, but he was blank. He wasn't the guy that was shaped by the betrayal life had thrown at him. He was shaped by will. By his own volition.

The same way he knew how to soften everyone to his will. I slowly started to reach my hand out to move his hair away from his eyes. They weren't exactly in the way, but... I just wanted to get a little closer. For my own sake.

I moved his hair, then slowly, let my index finger fall to the chiselled contour of his face. My eyes dropped to follow the path that my finger was taking, and my lips parted as I got further immersed in the treacherous boundaries I was breaking.

"What are you doing?"

I froze, my hand immediately stopping in place right next to his lower lip, my heart sinking. Slowly, I turned to face him, and he was watching me, coldness etched deep in his eyes.

I swallowed, my eyes darting to my hand before I quickly turned back to him again. My mind was blank, and I couldn't even think of a word to say.

"I... I am..."

He raised a brow as if to encourage me to keep talking, but there was nothing more I had to say. I started to move away instead, but that plan was immediately thwarted as he grabbed my wrist, pulling me back till I could feel his breath tattooing the unspoken words on my skin, till I could feel the air I was breathing mixing with his.

My eyes darted across both of his, not daring to drop any lower, or my mind would give me away.

He was far more composed than I was even when I wasn't even this close to him, and his eyes held a bit of something behind them that I couldn't place my hand on.

"Turns out I have nothing to say either," he said slowly, so slowly that it almost went over my head.

My brows furrowed as I let the words sink in, and I broke into a laugh, my head lowering, even though my hand was still in his. Sin cracked a small smile, then let me go, a small breath escaping him.

"I am sorry for interrupting your sleep."

He calmly shrugged, then brought the cigarette to his lips, his eyes closing as he took a long drag.

I slowly sat on the window, my eyes watching him.

"Are you sad?"

He lifted his eyes to me, then shrugged. "About Angel leaving or the fact that I thought she would choose me?"

I swallowed. "That must hurt."

He gave a small chuckle. "Hurt? I don't get hurt, Annalise. And I refuse to let Larissa use my daughter as a pawn to get to me."

I sighed, a small smile spreading my lips. "Aren't you just..."

"I know," he said, meeting my eyes. "If Angel never comes back to me because I refuse to be played, then so be it."

I could see the darkness spread across his face, and I slowly leaned into him, my hand cupping the left side of his face. I wasn't exactly sure what I was doing, but it felt right, and I just did it without much thought.

"I am sure Angel will come back. You are her father. Larissa will never be able to love her the way that you do."

He chuckled again, then met my eyes. He never said a thing about my hand on his cheek, and I didn't move it either.

"She probably will, but I will not wait. As for you, Annalise..." He trailed off, then took another drag of his cigarette.

I felt my heart sink as he took his time, and I wondered what he wanted to say. Now that Angel was gone with Larissa, did that mean...

"Get ready. We have somewhere to be tomorrow."