Chapter 29

Chapter Twenty-Nine Hope Caleb's warm tongue along my lips brings a new flush to my skin. My heart rate picks up as the warmth emanating from his hot skin heats up my flesh. He closes his eyes and deepens the kiss, drawing my tongue from my mouth to join his. I suddenly feel a need to be with him, wrapped in his strong arms. I tip my head back as his tongue glides down my throat and licks along my neck and shoulder. I move the platter of strawberries onto the nightstand with the two flutes of sparkling liquid. Caleb's fingers trace across my shoulder and slowly moves the small spaghetti strap that holds up my nightgown. I feel the silk drift from my shoulder down my arm. His other hand repeats the same trail across my shoulder, dipping the strap down on that side as well. He runs his fingertips across the swell of my breasts, lower my nightgown to expose them. Seeing that he's turned on as well, I run my fingers along the top of his towel and love the way his muscles jump beneath my touch. In a few hours, he'll be my husband and that thought has me so turned on I can't wait for him to make the next move. As if reading my mind, he slides his hands up my thighs and gathers my nightgown at my waist before pulling it off entirely down my legs. Caleb's gaze sweeps down my body and I watch as desire shows in his eyes. His hand roams back up my skin, sliding over my curves and then back down to my core, lightly circling before hooking his fingers into my panties and removing them. I don't feel embarrassed to be bared to him and instead I gently pull on his towel so it falls from its position around his waist. His lips are on mine again instantly as he climbs on top of me and positions himself between my legs. My eyes are closed and he tenderly sweeps his lips across my neck, licking below my ear before working his way lower, across my collarbone and then down to my chest. Caleb slides both hands behind my back and lifts my chest to his face. I run my fingers through his hair as the warmth from his mouth covers every sensitive area. My legs fall open a little wider and he positions himself against my core to increase the friction where we both need it. When I feel like my body is building pleasure tighter and tighter, his hand slips between our legs and circles along my most sensitive flesh bringing me over the edge against his hand. I suck in breath after breath as Caleb enters my body, groaning at the sensation of warmth and the clenching of my muscles around him. He sets a slow and steady pace that has me back on the precipice of pleasure again in minutes. I rock my hips against his and he pulls my knee up to position himself deeper within me and together we fall over the edge again. Caleb remains on top of me, kissing my temple, and holding me tightly against him, our bodies melted together. His eyes return to mine and he brushes the hair from my face and rests his forehead against mine. We kiss softly, regaining our regular breathing as we remain so closely connected. When our breaths are steady and our heart rates are slowed, Caleb moves to the side of me and cradles my head on his chest. I run my hand along his skin as he kisses my head and rubs his hand along the back of my head, twisting my hair at the end between his fingers. A comfortable silence stretches out before us as we lie in the dark and watch the lights from the strip down below, twinkle on the ceiling above us. It happens then, in the silence of the night, for first time since finding out about the baby I wonder where my mother is and how she could have ever agreed to give up her rights to Nathan. In my moments of extreme happiness I always wonder what it would feel like to have a mother that I could call and share those moments with. Tonight as I grow sleepy in Caleb's arms, I grieve for the mother that I should have had and for the empty seat that will be so starkly noticeable to me when I stand at the end of the alter and agree to join my life forever with Caleb's. My mother's addiction will not get to ruin one more moment of my life or Nathan's. I trust Caleb to make that happen. I close my eyes and take a deep breath, deciding that when I walk down that isle tomorrow, I'll leave my mother behind for good. I won't waste one more minute trying to hide from her or defend myself against her bad choices. As I start my life with Caleb, I'll be free and clear from the burden she's been my whole life. Most importantly, on the day I give birth to a child of my own, I'll make a promise to always put my child's needs above my own.