Monster I Loved
Monster I Loved
Pearly stood slowly.
Then faced him fully.
“Okay,” she whispered.
“Let’s talk.”
Her voice cracked violently.
“Let’s talk about how you killed my cousin.”
The smile disappeared from Jaden Gabe’s face instantly.
All color drained from him.
And in that moment,
Pearly no longer needed answers.
Because the truth was already right there.
In his silence.
In his expression.
In the horror filling his eyes.
“P-Pearly…”
She immediately raised one trembling hand.
“Don’t.”
The betrayal inside her chest felt unbearable now.
Sharp enough to make breathing painful.
“I made a mistake…”
She stepped backward as he instinctively moved toward her.
“Stay there!”
Her voice finally broke completely.
Pearly looked down at the phone still clutched tightly in her shaking hand.
Then suddenly,
Everything crashed into her all at once.
“I made a mistake…” she whispered again.
“I can’t…”
Her breathing became ragged.
“I can’t even look at you right now.”
Jaden Gabe moved toward her again.
Desperate.
Panicked.
He reached for her arm,
And Pearly slapped him across the face.
“Get out of my sight!”
The sound echoed violently through the room.
Jaden Gabe froze.
Completely stunned.
The anger in Pearly’s eyes shattered into tears almost immediately afterward.
Because hurting him didn’t make the pain disappear.
It only made it more real.
“Pearly…”
His voice sounded destroyed now.
But Pearly shook her head violently.
“Get out before I start hating you!”
That was the line that finally broke him.
Not the slap.
Not the accusation.
That.
Jaden Gabe stood there silently while Pearly collapsed into sobs in front of him.
Then slowly,
His shoulders dropped.
Like something inside him had finally given up.
Pearly cried harder after he walked out.
So hard her chest physically hurt.
Because suddenly,
She didn’t know who she could trust anymore.
“WHERE ARE YOU GOING?!”
Jaden Gabe’s voice came from outside the room the moment she dragged the suitcase out.
He never actually left.
Of course he didn’t.
“I’m leaving.”
The words tasted like blood in her mouth.
“There’s no reason for me to stay here anymore.”
Jaden Gabe stared at the suitcase in complete silence.
His green eyes looked pale now.
Almost empty.
And somehow,
That hurt too.
It was cruelly ironic.
For years, Pearly dreamed about finding her cousin’s killer.
Dreamed about confronting him.
Dreamed about justice.
But now that she finally stood face-to-face with the truth,
She felt nothing like she imagined.
Not victorious.
Not relieved.
Just broken.
Because the monster she was supposed to hate…
Was the same man she loved enough to destroy herself for.
Everything between them suddenly felt unreal.
The laughter.
The touches.
The love.
Even her feelings for him seemed frozen now beneath the weight of betrayal.
Leaving felt like the only thing she could still control.
She needed distance.
Space.
Time to think before she completely lost herself.
Maybe she should hate him.
Maybe she should report him.
Send him to prison.
Demand justice for Geovanna.
For Aunt Pat.
But how exactly was she supposed to send a vampire to prison?
Who would even believe her?
The police would probably laugh in her face before locking her up instead.
And somehow…
That realization made Pearly feel even more trapped than before.
Jaden Gabe nodded slowly.
Like he had already expected this moment long before it happened.
The bones in his clenched hand cracked softly one after another.
“I knew this would happen,” he said hoarsely. “I knew you’d hate me once you found out.”
His eyes stayed fixed on her.
Painfully steady.
“I knew you would leave.”
Pearly’s chest tightened violently.
Because the worst part was,
He sounded more heartbroken than defensive.
Jaden Gabe swallowed hard before speaking again.
“That’s why I kept hesitating to tell you.”
His voice lowered.
Broken now.
“But please believe me, Pearly… I’ve wanted to tell you the truth for a long time.”
“That’s enough.”
She cut him off immediately.
Sharp.
Shaking.
Because if he continued talking,
She might break completely.
And she couldn’t afford that right now.
She didn’t want explanations.
Didn’t want apologies.
Didn’t want to hear him say her name like that anymore.
Not when she was already struggling to walk away from him.
Jaden Gabe lowered his head briefly.
Then whispered,
“I’m sorry, Zara.”
The nickname nearly destroyed her.
“I’ll pay for what I did,” he continued quietly. “Just tell me what you want me to do.”
Pearly looked away immediately.
Because hearing him sound willing to destroy himself for her somehow hurt even more.
“I don’t want to see you anymore.”
The silence afterward felt unbearable.
“Pearly…”
His voice sounded strangled now.
Like those words were the cruelest punishment she could have given him.
Maybe they were.
Without another word, Pearly walked past him.
Every step hurt.
Every second beside him hurt more.
But she forced herself to keep moving anyway.
Because stopping now would be dangerous.
She reached the living room just as Criss walked inside.
The moment he noticed the suitcase in her hand,
His expression changed completely.
Pearly stopped in front of him.
Then quietly asked,
“Do you know who killed my cousin?”
Criss froze instantly.
Like someone had poured ice water directly over him.
The silence alone was enough to answer her.
“Neng…”
His voice came out weak.
Pained.
But Pearly cut him off immediately.
“Answer me, Criss.”
He looked away first.
And somehow,
That hurt more than hearing the truth out loud.
Pearly started walking again.
Then suddenly,
Arms wrapped tightly around her from behind.
Criss buried his face against her shoulder.
And for the first time since she met him,
He looked completely helpless.
“Let go of me, Criss…”
“Do you hate me?”
The question sounded painfully small coming from him.
Pearly closed her eyes tightly.
Because she didn’t know anymore.
Didn’t know who deserved her anger.
Didn’t know who deserved forgiveness.
Didn’t even know what she was supposed to feel anymore.
“You have every right to be angry,” Criss whispered.
“With all of us.”
When he finally turned her around, his eyes were visibly wet.
“Yes,” he said quietly. “You deserve to hate us.”
Pearly’s throat tightened painfully.
“But please don’t leave alone.”
Criss looked genuinely terrified now.
“It’s dangerous outside.”
A bitter laugh escaped Pearly before she could stop it.
“It’s more dangerous for me to stay here.”
The words hit him hard.
She saw it immediately.
“If another war comes after your clan…” she whispered shakily, “then I’ll just become another weakness people use against you.”
Criss’s jaw tightened.
Because they both knew she was right.
“My family died because of all of this,” Pearly continued softly.
“Because of vampires.”
The pain in Criss’s eyes deepened instantly.
And somehow,
That hurt her too.
“I’m leaving,” she whispered.
Then more quietly,
“Thank you for everything.”
Criss looked like he physically wanted to stop her.
But he didn’t.
Because forcing her to stay would only destroy her further.
“I hope this is the last time we meet.”
Before she could walk toward the door, Criss stepped in front of her.
“At least let me take you where you’re going.”
Pearly shook her head immediately.
But Criss looked desperate now.
“At least to the bus terminal.”
His voice cracked slightly.
“Please.”
A pause.
“I promise I won’t follow you after.”
Pearly finally nodded weakly.
Mostly because she no longer had the strength to argue.
And partly because,
Despite everything,
Criss still felt painfully like family.
The drive to the terminal was silent.
Heavy.
Criss kept both hands tightly gripping the steering wheel the entire time.
He never looked at her once.
Not because he didn’t want to.
Because he couldn’t.
His pride wouldn’t let him cry in front of her.
And Pearly understood that.
That realization made her chest ache even more.
Because despite all the lies,
Criss truly loved her like a sister.
And maybe that was what made betrayal hurt this badly.
When the car finally stopped, Pearly quietly reached for the door.
Then paused.
She leaned over slowly and kissed Criss gently on the cheek.
A silent goodbye.
A final act of kindness he probably didn’t deserve.
Yet she still gave it anyway.
“Goodbye, Criss…”
Her voice trembled softly.
Then the other goodbye stayed trapped painfully inside her chest.
The one she couldn’t say out loud without breaking completely.
Goodbye…
Jaden Gabe.
As Pearly stepped out of the car and into the crowded terminal,
She realized something terrifying.
She was leaving behind the man who ruined her life.
And somehow…
He was still the only person her heart wanted to run back to.