Let Me Be Your Boyfriend

Let Me Be Your Boyfriend
Sam's POV

We had absolutely nothing against Rowan, so Rowan was released. If anything, the CCTV footage that implicated me and ruined my career proved his innocence in the deaths and everything, since he was outside kissing me when the two murders happened.
He walked down the path to the door, escorted out by Officer Marlowe, while Alex stood by the wall of the corridor leading to the holding cell, watching him leave, his stare like that of an eagle who just lost prey. He ground his jaw so hard I could hear it from my desk.
Rowan turned to steal glances at me as I sat behind my desk. I dropped my head, avoiding his eyes with every strength in my body and soul. I cleaned the tears staining my eyes with the back of my hand, and I looked down to my desk, trying to go through the little files I had on my table, files from past unsolved cases.
I flipped through the pages of the documents, sniffing gently, but soon tears were spilling out of my eyes again, the warm moisture coating my vision, dripping onto the pages of the documents before me.
I just closed the folder shut, and I threw my head into my hands, covering myself with my arms as I let the tears flow now, letting my heart wrench itself against my chest, letting it shatter and piece itself back together again. Though I dimmed my sobs so no one would hear them. I wanted to be vulnerable to myself even if it's for a minute, but the thing I won't do is let anyone else see me down.
My fist pulsed around me, and I thought back to my life. I had always had everything under control, always gone by the book, always done what was required of me, and always solved every case before me passionately, but when finally the biggest case of my career came, all this had to happen. I had to develop a fatal attraction to the very man who would ruin me. Just why did all these have to happen? Why do I have to go through this? I repeated the questions in my head over and over again until I had grown tired of it, and then I shut my eyes tight, drying off the remnant tears in my eyes and wiping the rest with the back of my hands, and then I forced on a bright smile, and I raised my head back to the room.
He was already standing there—just before my desk—the very last person I want to see—Alex. The heat in his eyes softened as they traced my face, and a concerned look crawled into them.
“Were you crying, Sam?” He asked, reaching to touch my face.
I swiped off his hands even before he could reach my face. “What do you want, Alex? You already have the case as you always wanted, so what else do you want from me?” I demanded.
His lips loosened for speech but clamped back immediately. He finally opened them again, echoing out a low exhale. He stared sharply at me. “You do; you always have to make me into the bad guy, Sam.” He said. “We both know I am not. You got tossed off the case because of your continuous involvement with a person of interest in the same case you were investigating.” He said.
My gaze flicked on Rim through the rim of my eyes as I pretended to go over the cold case files. “I never said you took the case from me, Alex. Nor do I blame you for anything. All I just want from you is peace. Is that too much to ask?” I said. “Just leave me the hell alone, Alex, and I’ll be fine.”
But the bastard just won't leave. He thrust his head down to me over the monitor on my desk. The new closeness forced me to drop back a bit from my own desk and dragged my eyes to him fully.
“What do you want, Alex?” I asked.
“I can get you back the case, Sam. We both know I can persuade Captain James to give you back the case, completely,” he said. “And if he still wouldn’t, I can work back my transfer to the next precinct, and he would be forced to give the case back to you because no one else here is as good as you are.”
“And I guess the way to repay your magnanimous gesture is to climb back into your arms.” I said, not bothering to hide my spite. I wanted him to know I hated him; there was no need to sugarcoat it with false smiles and gentler words.
“What is so bad with that, Sam? You have always found solace in my arms before we broke up before.” He said. The tone of his voice switched now to something explicitly tainted with a mix of jealousy and rage. “And you were willing to fuck that criminal in a hotel room some hours ago, a hotel room where another woman, one he was with, was killed. Why can't you jump on my cock as you are always willing to jump on his? What's so special about him? Why does he get to kiss you and fuck you and I don't when he can never love you as much as I do? What does that bastard have that you are choosing him over me?” He said.
My blood heated into lava inside of me, adrenaline flooding me so bad my hands trembled around the files in my hand, my fingers curling into fists around the paper folder, but I held back my fury. The last thing I needed was a fight with him in the office. I dropped the folder in my hands, pushed the files away, snatched my phone and keys from the desk, and jumped fast to my feet.
“Goodbye, Alex.” I said, and I marched for the door.
He snatched my wrist, pulling me back gently. “Look at me, Sam. I can help you get back this case; just listen to me.” He paused. “How about just a night together? We go on a date and get some good old sex like before, and I promise you, even if you say you still don't want to be with me, I will help you get back the case, and I will leave you alone.”
“Goodbye, Alex.” I repeated, my voice scathing as before. I jerked my hand free from his grip and marched out of the office.
“Sam! Sam!!” He called onto me, but I refused to answer, continuing for the door. I strode down the parking lot for my car.
I pulled the car door and wanted to step in, but strong fingers folded again on my wrist, and I was spun around to face someone’s chest.
I was about to swing my arm to slap him when his voice broke through. “It's me, detective,” he said in a tone devoid of his usual joking and teasing.
I wanted to pull away from him, but he didn't let go. He pressed my head on his chest, instead, caressing my hair more gently with his palm. “I am sorry, detective, for putting you through all whatever you are going through.” He said.
I don't know why I found comfort in arms, I don't know why my body submitted to his, and my vulnerability unlocked itself in his presence. Because I held him tight, and I cried against his chest, sobbing gently, letting all my pain and disappointment out.
And when I was done, I lifted my head to him, pushing him off me gently. “I think that's enough of you seeing me like this.” I said, looking away from him.“Goodnight, Rowan.” I moved for the car, but he snatched me back, his arm firm on my waist, pulling me to him.
I had no choice but to look into his eyes now, the amber-hazel pair, for the first time shown with emotions, not the usual teasing glint he always wore.
“Tonight, Samantha,” he said, choosing my name now. “Let me be your boyfriend, even if just this once. I know I am the cause of whatever is going wrong in your life right now, so for this night, even if it is this night alone, let me be your boyfriend. And then I promise I am going to leave and never come back again to haunt you with my presence.”
My lips parted to tell him no. He was the man that got me into this mess in the first place, and continuous involvement with him is the last thing I needed, but instead of the no my lips were pouting to scream at him, and I found myself muttering, “Okay.”
What more was there to lose? The case had already been taken away from me.