40

I woke up suddenly.

I felt a layer of sweat on my skin and the painful way my heart was beating. I held the soft sheet that covered me and breathed in relief with the soft feeling of the pillow under my sore head. Even in pain, I forced myself to look around the calm room, but I couldn’t see much with my blurry vision. I brought my hand to my face and groaned loudly from the sharp pain. I could only see with one eye.

With a grunt, I sat up in bed. The strong smell of blood had faded, but I still felt it on my lips.

"It's better to stay lying down a bit longer."

The sudden voice made my heart stop. A dark figure appeared beside me out of nowhere, and with wide eyes, I violently pulled away from its touch, jumping out of bed. I hit the nightstand, knocking everything to the floor.

"Ryuuji," Matias tried, moving toward me.

I gasped as my body collided with the wall and curled up when his hands reached me. I pushed him with all the strength I had left, but he clung to my body, pulling me into his warm arms.

"Don’t move, you need to stay still," he said in a hoarse voice, but I kept fighting, remembering the way his gaze was on me, the horrible feeling of his fist cutting my skin, and the strong smell of blood choking me.

I wanted to run.

"Ryuuji!" he pleaded against my ear. His grip was strong, and I heard myself crying in his rigid arms.

I cried like a foolish, weak child, filled with fear and pain.

"Please, Ryuuji," he repeated, lifting me off the ground. Matias held me tightly, and no matter how much I fought or cried, he didn’t hesitate. "Forgive me, please," he murmured in his hoarse and desperate voice.

My body weakened with his plea. Slowly, I felt myself soften, and the pain pierced my skull.

"I had to, I had to make it look real," he explained, holding me more gently. "You need to forgive me. I promise this will never happen again," he reassured, turning my face toward him, making me meet his gaze. "I’ll take care of you. We’ll be fine, I promise," he declared, his face full of sadness and fear, a feeling I had never seen consume him.

My lips moved, making everything hurt, and my head throbbed fiercely. My tears returned, and I closed my eye, feeling him gently wipe them away.

"If I hadn’t done it, they would have, and I… I couldn’t… I couldn’t…" Matias stopped, pressing his mouth tightly. "Please, don’t hate me," he pleaded, locking my gaze.

It was as if I were seeing him for the first time.

"Don’t leave me," he whispered, squeezing me tighter against his body. "Don’t leave me, okay?" he repeated, burying his face in my neck.

But all I could do was cry.

***

I forced myself to drink the sweet tea with honey. With each sip, the taste of blood faded, but I still felt my gums burning and my jaw tense.

"Too hot?" Matias asked, watching me with expectation.

"No," I said with difficulty. My voice was so raspy, but it felt good to say something.

Matias had tried to clean my face, but the pain was so unbearable that he gave up. I had no idea how much time had passed since what happened, but from the windows, it was still dark outside. Maybe I hadn’t been unconscious for long.

"Three hours," he said, answering my thoughts.

"I need a doctor," I declared, making him nod.

"I can’t take you, and if I call, they’ll find out it’s me," he explained, holding my gaze. "I need to call them," he warned hesitantly.

I drank the last sip of tea, wondering how this could get worse. Could it get worse? I couldn’t feel half of my face, and the pain was excruciating. With every blink, I felt like I was going to pass out.

"Call," I agreed.

Matias grabbed my phone from between the sheets and watched me settle back into bed. Lying on my side, I studied his tired face with difficulty. It seemed like he hadn’t slept in days.

"This is Matias," he said to one of the twins on the other end of the line. "I’m with Ryuuji and..." He stopped talking, and I imagined all the threats Shin or Kenji were making. "No, shut up. Yeah, damn it! Shut up!" he shouted.

I wanted to laugh at this whole fucked-up situation.

"He asked me to call," he explained, looking at me. "He needs help. Come get him without drawing attention. I’ll send the address," he warned and hung up.

"Shit," I muttered, closing my eye. They’ll find out. They’ll know what I’ve been doing and with whom. I heard Matias moving around the room, and then the weight of the mattress sank down. I sighed deeply as he touched my hair, pushing some platinum strands away from my forehead.

"It’ll be okay," he murmured, stealing a tired smile from me, but I groaned at the pain that shot through my head. "Say you don’t hate me," he requested, lowering his touch to my neck.

I opened my eye, meeting his gaze filled with anxiety.

"I don’t hate you," I confessed, touching his shirt, feeling his heart racing.

"This won’t end like this. I’ll make them pay," he said intensely.

"I know you will," I murmured, feeling myself relax on the warm mattress. My eye began to close, heavy and tired.

"Don’t sleep," he asked, shaking me gently. "They’ll be here soon. You need to stay awake," he commanded, making me sigh painfully.

"I just need to rest for a minute," I commented.

"Sorry, Ryuuji," he suddenly apologized, and I screamed as he pulled me abruptly, sitting me up on the bed. My head throbbed, and I felt my neck tense.

"You fucking bastard! Asshole!" I gasped, trembling.

"Sorry. Sorry," he repeated, holding my bare shoulders.

"You need to stay..."