CHAPTER 48: Too Little Too Late

Ram's POV.

It hurts me more when I see the pain and worry on the face of the person I love the most. I want to hug her to make her feel that she is not alone. I want to tell her that everything will be fine, that Henry will survive, and that I'm here for her because I love her so much. But I stopped myself because I knew it wasn't the right time.

We need to talk so that everything is clear to us. Two years have passed and a lot has changed, but she's still the girl I knew and loved.

"Atilla..." I just heard it come out of my mouth; honestly, I wanted to tell her a lot of things, but as much as I wanted to speak, I didn't know where or how to start.

Suddenly, I remembered what Ellaine told me: that if I really love Atilla, I shouldn't bother her anymore. But no matter how hard I think about it, my mind and heart can't accept her advice.

"Well, it seems that the two of us will manage Henry's businesses, so I hope we can work together," she said with a smile, followed by reaching out her hand.

I couldn't believe that it seemed like I was nothing to her, that she treated me like one of her business deals and not her former lover.

Although hesitant, I reached out and felt the joy of holding her hand, and I had to hold back from pulling her towards me and enclosing her in my arms.

"Well... I guess I'll be on my way then," she said with a smile and turned to leave, but just then my right hand moved on its own and grabbed her by the arm to stop her from walking away.

I suddenly felt scared as she said her goodbyes as if I wouldn't be able to handle it if she were to leave me again.

I know this is not the right time to talk about what happened between us, but I can't go on living without the woman I love.

"Do you need anything, Ram?" she asked with a casual smile as if our meeting was of no consequence to her.

"I think we need to talk, Atilla," I said seriously, and as soon as I said that, her forehead furrowed.

I decided to take her to a nearby restaurant owned by a friend from college. It was a cozy place, and if you wanted privacy, you could have it there, as there were other rooms for VIPs. We were followed by the driver who had just dropped her off.

"Welcome back, Mr. Santiago," the staff greeted us as we got out of the car. I had already informed my friends of our arrival, so they were expecting us.

We were led to a room at the end of the restaurant, and as soon as we settled in, the waiter handed us the menu.

"I will have the usual, Ernesto," I said, handing back the menu.

Atilla perused the menu before making her order. After taking our orders, Ernesto left us alone in the room.

I could feel Atilla's presence around me, and if I didn't know what to do, at least she was calm as she waited for our orders.

"So, what do you want to talk about?" She asked with a smile, still calm, which, whether I admitted it or not, reduced the hope in my heart.

"How are you?" I asked gently, looking straight into her eyes, hoping to see the same love and emotion I used to see when she looked at me, but I didn't see it now.

"I'm good; thanks for asking. How about you? I heard your business survived, which is not really a surprise since we both know you're a great businessman."

"It's not easy, to be honest, but I need to work hard for me and my dad," I replied while still staring at her beautiful face.

"Oh right, how is dad... I mean, how is your dad doing?" Somehow, hearing the word dad from her reminded me of the time when we were still together, and I felt guilty for hurting her feelings.

"He's doing good, he's become stronger, and Atilla..." I said, but my voice trailed off as I struggled to find the right words to say. It's hard to know where to start when you have so much to say. I took a deep breath to calm my nerves because I knew I couldn't afford to make any mistakes.

But just as I was about to speak, our orders arrived, so I had no choice but to put off the conversation.

Silence prevailed between us as we savored our food. Neither Atilla nor I knew how to start a simple conversation.

I waited until the last plate was cleared from our table before attempting to open up. "Atilla..." I began, but the opportunity seemed to slip away as her phone suddenly rang.

"Wait, Ram, I need to answer this call, excuse me," she said without even waiting for my response and quickly left the room.

I tried to calm my nerves while waiting for her to finish her phone call, but I couldn't take it anymore, so I decided to follow her.

I caught up with her outside the restaurant, where she was all smiles, something she didn't show when we met earlier. For some reason, I felt jealous, something I had never felt before in my entire life.

I approached her but stopped a few steps away when I heard what she was saying to her caller. "I know, please look after Henry for me when they arrive in the US, ahh, I love you too, Ang," it was like the sky and earth had collided as I heard those words from her lips. It felt like a thousand needles were piercing my chest upon realizing that the person I loved was already with someone else.

"Uhmmm... I... followed you because I thought something happened to you," I suddenly rattled when she saw me.

Ahhh, sorry, Ram, I needed to answer Ang's call," she explained, and I tried to show her that I wasn't affected by what I heard, even though tears were already threatening to form in my eyes.

"Just like the name of the main character in the cartoon?" I asked absentmindedly, and I saw her smile widen even more.

"Yes, just like in the cartoon," she said, chuckling, and I felt even more pain as I saw the twinkle in her eyes as we talked about the man she loved.

"So you two are... how long have you two been together?" To be honest, I couldn't think straight because of the pain I was feeling.

"We've been together for a year now. I met him in Australia, he saved me when someone tried to harm me, and a lot has happened since then," she happily recounted, while I continued to hurt.

"He seems to be a really nice guy," I said.

"Yes, he is. He's the best thing that ever happened to me. Because of him, I learned to be independent," she said.

I decided to say goodbye because I felt like I couldn't hide my feelings anymore.

"I'm glad that you found someone like him; um, I'll go ahead as I have something to attend to. You should rest for a while, I know you haven't had enough rest since coming back to the country," I said while looking at her innocent face, looking at the woman I lost because of my stupid pride.

I quickly turned around and walked back to my car while she got into the car where Henry's driver was waiting.

As soon as I got into my car, I let go of the pain I was feeling and let my tears freely flow from both of my eyes because of the pain of the reality that I had lost the woman I loved.

I don't know which is more painful, losing the person you love or the fact that the person you love is already happy with someone else.

Maybe Ellaine was right—I shouldn't disturb Atilla's peaceful life. Can I bear hurting Atilla again if I force myself on him, knowing that she is happy and has moved on from the love she had for me?