When Elisa woke up again, she was alone in the hospital room. Her phone was dead so she didn't know how long she had slept. Looking out the window, the sky was still dark.
Elisa got up, put on her shoes, grabbed her bag and walked out. As she passed by Lila's room, she couldn't help but stop as she saw the door was slightly ajar. Lila was inside with her husband Hamish.
Lila had a face that made people fall for her. Even wearing the blue and white striped hospital gown couldn't hide her clean and elegant aura. Her skin was very fair which made her almond eyes appear bright and clear. Elisa thought perhaps this was what Hamish liked about Lila, that innocent energy that came from within. Comparing herself, she was just a vicious hearted person who broke them up.
Hamish's kindness to Lila made Elisa a little jealous. Looking at them for too long, even she admired their relationship. People who didn't know Hamish thought he was cold by nature, but Elisa knew he had given all his gentleness to Lila and was unwilling to spare any for others. Of course, he had been good to her a long time ago, but now there was nothing left.
Her peeping eventually caught the attention of the two inside. Lila looked at her once and her body shook like a little white rabbit as she hid behind Hamish. Her face showed fear, eyes red, as if looking at an unforgivable villain.
Hamish gently patted Lila's shoulder, giving Elisa an icy cold stare. Seeing it was Elisa standing at the door, irritation rose within him. That irritation turned into disgust and openly showed on his face as he scolded, "What are you doing standing there?"
Elisa stood at the door watching the intimate couple inside. She suddenly felt it was too dazzling and didn't want to look but she really couldn't help it. Because this was a side of Hamish she had never seen before, the Hamish she yearned for. The more she looked, the more blurry her eyes became. It hurt so much, her heart felt dead.
Hamish shielded Lila behind him, glaring at Elisa. Seeing her pale bloodless face, a complicated emotion rose within him and his brows furrowed tightly.
"Since you're awake, go back."
Elisa hesitated and asked hoarsely, "Are you coming home tonight?"
Seeing the guarded look in Hamish's eyes, Elisa didn't even bother explaining. She didn't understand what terrible thing she had done over the years to make Hamish guard against her like a thief.
People's hearts are made of flesh. Although she had separated him from Lila, during their four years of marriage, she had served him like a nanny, taking care of his daily needs.
Although she couldn't achieve a harmonious marriage, she had never interfered with his relationship with Lila over the years. In the past, Hamish was more cautious, doing things in secret. After the Powell family declined and fell off the rich list, she was no longer a threat to him.
She had never mentioned his open or hidden affairs with Lila. But to say she didn't care? How could that be possible?
Being with Hamish, Elisa lost everything. Not only did she get stomach cancer and was dying, she also had to help prolong his life. She was about to lose her own life yet who was there to help prolong hers?
Elisa's heart suddenly felt like it was being pierced by thousands of needles, the pain spreading through her blood vessels to every limb and joint. Even her fingertips hurt and shook.
Elisa didn't argue with Hamish's order. After so many years she had gotten used to it, from initial fawning to now quietly restraining herself, drawing a line she could not cross.
As she turned to leave, Elisa heard Lila's voice come from inside.
"Is Elisa okay after giving so much blood? She looks so pale."
"She's fine, her health has always been good."
Look, this was the man she loved. Even her love rival could see her poor complexion yet he did not.
Hamish was not a careless person. He could spot issues at work with one glance, know right away if something happened to Lila, yet he had no patience or care for Elisa who he had known for six years.
Elisa took a deep breath, left this place without looking back. The rain outside was getting heavier.
She lowered her head and slowly walked back. There was no umbrella in her bag. After getting drenched, her body chilled to the bone. Her originally sallow lips were now chapped from the cold. Her curled lashes also had water beads on them.
The cold made Elisa's head and eyes swell up. Even her stomach ached from the chill. She reached to clutch her stomach but accidentally knocked off the ring on her left hand. Elisa stared blankly as she followed after it. After wearing it for four years, the ring had lost its original luster and had even blackened. She thought back to when they had signed the marriage contract and she casually said, "Now that we're married, we should at least have wedding rings right?"
Hamish had heard her and directly bought a cheap 30 dollar single ring from a roadside stall and tossed it to her.
He mocked, "Here, this is all you're worth."
At that time, Elisa just smiled faintly, the desolation in her eyes unspeakable. The ring was a size too small. She forced it onto her finger until her ring finger was red and bleeding but she persisted in wearing it.
At that time, Elisa stubbornly thought that if she wore the ring long enough, someday it would fit. She didn't expect that after wearing it for so long, it would slip off her finger.
Just like her relationship with Hamish.
Elisa curled up in the heavy rain, her stomach burning and churning violently. She quickly covered her mouth and dry heaved twice. Her eyes hurt until they were bloodshot and tears flowed out uncontrollably.
The rain continued to fall. Passersby on the streets opened up their umbrellas one after another. Elisa squatted on the ground and picked up the ring, clutching it to her chest. She slowly stood up after her stomach settled down a bit.
She was like a ghost in the rain, lost in her thoughts until she bumped into someone. Elisa came back to her senses, flustered as she lowered her head to apologize. It was a young mother and child. The woman held her child's hand, her voice gentle, "It's okay."
The child looked up at Elisa's flushed eyes and asked in a small voice, "Sister, were you crying?"
The woman patted the child's head and gave Elisa an apologetic look before leading the child away.
With their backs to her, Elisa heard the child ask his mother, "Why was sister crying? Was she scared?"
"How could big sister be scared?"
The sound of rain grew lighter and Elisa gradually couldn't make out what else the mother and child said.
Elisa gently clutched her stomach. She looked up and forcefully held back her tears. Scared? How could she not be scared - going to the hospital alone, getting an endoscopy, being called to the doctor's office alone, and finally being diagnosed with a terminal illness. With all that, how could she not be terrified to the point her whole body turned cold.
But more than all of that, what Elisa feared most was dying alone, without anyone by her side.