Chapter Twenty-Three: "Bending the Mind"

Chapter Twenty-Three: "Bending the Mind"


Seraphina POV

“Mind clear, soul peaceful, and body still.” Annika repeated as she circled around me.

I was seated on the floor of the training sanctuary, trying to master what she called the control of the mind.

“A lobizona is a defilement of nature, and so the powers are all defilement of nature, like fire, mind control, wind waves, flood, and death.”

“These are the tenants of your power, but if you’re going to ever harness them, you need to embrace them, rather than chase it, starting with the simplest, mind control, your task is simple, you’re to make me reveal my deepest darkest fear. The first step of control is seizing it, and the best way to seize it, is to bend the mind to reveal its fears.”

I swallowed hard, trying to process her words. How on earth am i suppose to know what she feared.

Death, pain,

A large stick descended on my back, the pain ran through my body.

“Clear the mind. Not quizzle it.”

How can I know what she fear without quizzing.

As though she could read my mind another stick descended on my body.

I gritted my teeth, and raised my hands to touch the pain, she used the stick to hit my hands. I glared at her, but she used it to hit my shoulders, 

“Body posture stiff, always.”

I wanted to protest, but I was sure it’ll earn me another stick, so I sat as still as I could.

With my eyes closed. I tried hard not to think of anything. Except my heart was raging crazily, and my mind felt strained trying not to think of anything.

Like Ronan,

Another stick.

I groaned.

“You move too much, that’s how I can tell your mind is scattered.”

Well it’s hard not to move when I’m sitting on my kneel. I wasn’t exactly used to this kind of position.

“The only reason why Kyros could ever harness your power is cause you couldn’t, and he did it through your mind, through your fears, stay here, and until you learn what the answer is, you’re not to leave.”

My eyes snapped open and wide.

“And what if it takes all night.”

“Then better get ready. The cold is never friendly up this side.”

And just like that she turned to leave, she opened up a vortex of lightning and walked right through,

Leaving me up alone on the mountain cliff, I looked down and the height had me swallowing hard.

The only way to leave was if she came for me, and if I mistakenly lost my balance. It was sure to be death.

Not the kind of training I was going for.

I tried breathing through my nose.

The faster I did this, the faster I could go home,

I closed my eyes, adjusted my legs, and thought of nothing.

Fear fear fear, the pain from cranking my leg in the wrong position was stagnant in my mind,

I wanted nothing more than to lay down,

I mean I could still clear my head while asleep,

No. I have to do this, for the sake of those innocent twenty who died on my behalf.

I have to do this, to get back to Ronan, 

At that my heart squeezed painfully, I had left him so early, without even saying goodbye.

It still hunted me to know his reaction would not have been pleasant, and when lena told me that she planned to constrict him.

I wanted nothing more than to bail out, but the faster I got home, the faster his suffering ended.

Fear fear fear.

What does Annika fear?

Heights? Rogues? Monsters? Or losing someone she loved?

She had a teenage daughter, maybe she was afraid of losing her, all mother was afraid of losing her.

Yet deep down it didn’t resonate well.

Plus I was thinking. Thinking was out of the cue.

So I stayed quiet, listening only to the move of the wind, to the dance of the trees around me.

I stayed like that for five minutes, before I was snapping my eyes opened,

I repeated the actions, over and over,

And each time I opened my eyes, I would see that the sun was beginning to settle,

And soon it became night, and the cold was harsh.

I gritted my teeth, it was becoming even more painful sitting this way, my body did move on it accord to the left side, but I was able to catch myself before I fell.

I couldn’t fall, I couldn’t lay, I just have to stay still.

The tears were at the corner of my eyes, maybe this was how the almighty lobizona ends up dying.

A fall from the mountain top, or the cold in her heart.

Both were not a pleasant way to die.

I continued nonetheless, and my eyes did give out at some point.

And when I would open them, I saw my self back in the academy forest, only that this time, it was ronan body laying on the floor,

I rushed to him, but just as immediately my body jerked up, and I turned, only to reawaken in the real sense.

I had eventually given in and laid on the floor, but more frightening was that I had rolled to the edge, I sat up immediately, pushing myself away from it.

My heart beating incredibly fast,

The sun rays on my face brought my attention, it appears I survived through the night.

I tried returning to my position, but the vortex opened up out of nowhere, the wind from it had my hair flying around,

Annika came out from it, accompanied by a young lady, no younger than my age.

She had green eyes and bright red hair, like the fire.

“And have you learnt it now?”

No good morning? No how did you survive through, my lips were chapped from the cold, my entire bones felt frozen to the core.

And yet somehow that’s what took precedent. I fisted my hands, and gave her an intense look.

“You’re afraid of losing your daughter.”

“Wrong.”  She turned to leave, I crawled up after her,

“Wait wait.”

“Do you have my answer?”

“You’re afraid of death?”

“Wrong.”

She entered the vortex with the red lady, and it immediately closed up,

The dread filled me at once.

I was alone. 

Again.

In the unwavering and cruel mountain top,

The tears flowed, I wouldn’t last another night,

Maybe that’s good faith to the entire kingdom, Ronan face popped up again, his smile, his touches.

I can’t. I have to learn it.

And so this time I stretched to listen to the wind, and focus on it rhythm and movement.

I stayed up there for hours, and when night fall came, she didn’t come.

But I stayed still. Determined not to die. For Ronan.

He needs me. I couldn’t let him down, 

Soon the night fall passed, and I’m pretty sure my ears were ringing from listening to the wind, as though it’ll have my answer,

And by morning, the vortex opened up and Annika walked out.

“Answer?”

I remembered hearing the word M, like the humming of M,

“Mountain, you’re scared of heights.”

“Wrong.”

And like that she left, my stomach grumbled, my body stiff, but not from practice, from weakness instead.

I wanted water. Warmth, and far away from here.

But I kept at it again, wind listening, but this time the trees, I could hear it clear.

“Aaaaaaaaaaa.”

She’s scared of. Aaaa?

That’s not right, that’s not bloody right. I palmed my hair hard, wanting to pull it, to scream.

Then I took deep breaths, and continued.

By the next day, all I had for her was the aaaaaa

“You’re scared of aaaaaa.”

She raised an eyebrow, as though wondering if I had lost my mind,

And maybe I have, today makes it three days, since I have been here,

She turned to leave.

“Please wait, don’t go, if you leave, I’ll die. I can’t die, I have to live.”

The tears flowed, and she did turn back and sat down opposite me.

“Sometimes the greater the risk, the greater the reward.” 

More vagabonds.

“What do you see when you listen to the winds and trees.”

“Nothing.”

“Then you’re listening all wrong.”

What.

“You said to not think!”

“Yes. But I said nothing about sight.”

Before I could ask what she meant, she was already getting up,

“It’ll be a shame to see that you died this way, I always thought you had so much potential.”

I glared at her, “Lena will have your head if harm come to me.”

“Why do you think she sent you here? She knows of our training method, and yet she sent you here,  and that alone reveals your own fear. The fear of being abandoned.”

She smirked, cause she knew she was right. I hated that she was right, 

And just as she turned to leave, my heart caught on something.

She knew my fear cause it showed through my question.

What do I see? 

The winds and trees at my house never move in perfect synchronization, only when controlled by magic,

Meaning magic is what holds this place together, her fear, 

I remembered  when I came and how she talked about the hateful art of illusion, no, I remembered how she would stiff up each time magic was used.

And ever since coming here, her eyes would drift to the mountain and the trees and stiff up before she masked them.

Magic. 

That’s it. She was scared of magic.