Chapter 68 Keep This Underground
Briar's POV
His fingers threaded through my hair, tilting my head back so I had no choice but to meet his eyes, and the gold in them burned brighter than I'd ever seen. "Say it again."
I reached up and grabbed his ear, giving it a sharp tug. "Don't push your luck."
He laughed, the sound vibrating through his chest, and pulled me closer until there was no space left between us. "Don't move. Just let me hold you for a minute."
The scent of cedarwood wrapped around me, warm and grounding, and I felt my head go a little fuzzy. My thoughts scattered like leaves in the wind, and for a moment I let myself sink into the feeling of his arms around me, solid and real.
Then I saw it. A dark stain spreading across the cuff of his shirt, the fabric turning wet and clinging to his forearm. Blood. Fresh blood seeping through the torn material.
I went cold. The haze in my head cleared instantly, and I shoved against his chest hard enough that he loosened his grip. "Where's the first aid kit?"
He blinked at me, looking slightly dazed, and I pointed at his arm. "You're bleeding. Where do you keep your medical supplies?"
He glanced down at his sleeve like he'd forgotten he was injured, then let out a quiet sigh and stepped back. "Living room cabinet. I'll get it."
I sat down on the couch and pressed my palms against my thighs, trying to steady myself. My brain was finally catching up to what I'd just done, and the full weight of it crashed down on me all at once.
I'd said yes. I'd agreed to be with him. And Julian had no idea.
My fingertips went numb. What would Julian do when he found out? He'd already shown me what he was capable of when he felt threatened, and this would be worse than anything I'd done before. This wasn't just defiance. This was betrayal in his eyes.
And more importantly, what would he do to Lucian?
Lucian came back carrying a white plastic box with a red cross on the lid, and I took it from him without meeting his eyes. I opened it and pulled out antiseptic wipes and gauze, my hands moving on autopilot as I cleaned the gash on his forearm.
I kept my gaze fixed on his arm, focusing on the methodical process of wiping away the blood and applying pressure to stop the bleeding.
His voice cut through the quiet, low and careful. "Why did you freeze at that intersection? It was dangerous."
My hand jerked, and the cotton swab slipped from my fingers and fell to the floor. I bent down to pick it up, buying myself a few seconds to think of an answer. "It was nothing. I just—"
Before I could finish, he pulled me into his lap, his arms wrapping around me and holding me in place. "That line about weathering storms together wasn't a joke. I was terrified when I saw you standing there. Tell me why."
I closed my eyes and felt the fight drain out of me. He deserved to know. If we were going to do this, if we were really going to try, then I couldn't keep hiding pieces of myself from him.
I took a shaky breath and forced the words out. "Five years ago, my mother had severe depression. One day she decided she wanted to end it. She walked into the middle of the road, right into oncoming traffic."
"There was a woman. I don't know who she was. She saw what was happening and ran into the road, trying to stop us. It turned into chaos. Cars swerving, people screaming. I got thrown from the vehicle and ended up under one of the cars."
My voice cracked, and I had to pause to steady myself. "When I woke up in the hospital, they told me my mother was dead. The woman who tried to save us was dead. The driver of the other car was dead. I only remember seeing pills scattered all over the ground. My father took the settlement money and didn't press charges. That was it. Case closed."
Lucian pulled me closer, burying his face in my hair, and we sat there in silence.
After a long moment, he spoke, and his voice sounded strained. "Did you ever find out who that woman was?"
I shook my head. "No. I just remember she was wearing a black dress and carrying shopping bags." I paused, frowning. "Why?"
The room went deathly quiet. I could feel Lucian's body go rigid against mine, his breathing so shallow I could barely hear it. He didn't answer my question. Instead, he rested his chin on top of my head and ran his fingers through my hair in slow, soothing strokes.
I picked up the gauze and started wrapping his arm again, my movements careful and deliberate. When I finished tying off the bandage, I kept my eyes on his wrist. "I had an empty grave made for her next to my mother's. I visit them every year."
His voice came out rough and low. "She wouldn't blame you for what happened."
There was something in his tone I couldn't identify, something that made my chest ache. I looked up at him, searching his face for answers, but his expression was unreadable. "If I get the chance, I'd like to take you to see them sometime."
He nodded, and I saw a flash of gold in his eyes before he looked away. He tucked a strand of hair behind my ear, his touch gentle. "I'd like that."
I stood up and glanced around the third floor for the first time, taking in the chaotic mix of gaming equipment and collectibles scattered across every available surface. There were shelves lined with action figures, a massive gaming setup with three monitors, and several golden trophies displayed on a bookcase.
Lucian leaned against the doorframe, watching me with an amused expression. "Want to see the bedroom?"
I took three steps backward, my face heating. "No, I'm good."
He grinned, and I scrambled for a change of subject. I pointed toward the staircase. "What's with the arcade on the second floor?"
He shrugged. "Ash got obsessed with arcade games in high school and kept skipping class to go play. I figured it was easier to just build him one at home."
A flash of orange caught my eye, and I turned to see a fat tabby cat sprawled on the windowsill. It was the same cat I'd seen at the bar.
The cat hopped down and padded over to me, winding around my ankles and purring loud enough to rattle. I crouched down and scratched behind its ears, and it leaned into my hand with a contented rumble.
Lucian raised an eyebrow. "Nyx's picky. Kai gets scratched every time he tries to touch her, and Ash can only hold her for about thirty seconds before she bites him."
I ran my hand along the cat's back, and it flopped onto its side, exposing its belly. "How'd you end up with her?"
"She was a stray. I fed her once, and she decided I was hers." He watched me with an unreadable expression. "Haven't been able to get rid of her since."
I looked down at the cat purring in my lap and felt an odd sense of kinship.
The drive back to my apartment was quiet. Lucian had one hand on the steering wheel and the other drumming a lazy rhythm against his thigh, and I could tell from the set of his shoulders that he was in a good mood. I leaned my head against the window and watched the city lights blur past, my emotions a tangled mess of relief and dread.
My phone buzzed, and I glanced down to see a message from Leah: [Changed the apartment code to 1125. Don't forget.]
I stared at the screen and felt a reluctant smile tug at my lips.
Lucian glanced over at me. "So when are you planning to take me off your block list?"
I took a deep breath and turned to face him. "We need to keep this quiet. Underground."
He let out a low laugh. "So I'm your dirty little secret?"
I ignored the teasing tone and pressed on. "Until I can get Julian removed as a major shareholder of Vance Botanicals, we have to act like strangers in public."
He was quiet for a moment, his fingers tightening on the wheel. "And in private?"
I looked away, heat creeping up my neck. "In private, you can do whatever you want."
He reached over and took my hand, bringing it to his lips and pressing a kiss to my knuckles. The gold in his eyes flared bright. "That's all I need."
The car pulled up in front of my building, and I unbuckled my seatbelt. Before I could open the door, Lucian caught my wrist, his grip light but insistent.
"If Julian makes any move against you, I want to know immediately."
I turned back and wrapped my fingers around his, hooking my pinky with his. "I'll be careful. I promise."