The heart wants what the heart wants

The heart wants what the heart wants
We got to the diner and it was the kind of place that looked like it had grown out of the town instead of being built. It was small, warm, and tucked close to the beach where you could hear waves crashing if the night was quiet enough. Aiden loved places like this.

I parked the car and we headed inside. The bell above the door chimed softly. Warm yellow lights, soft chatter from the two other tables occupied, and the smell of cinnamon, frying butter, and coffee instantly wrapped around us.

Aiden chose a seat at the far corner, of course—his little instinctive habit of picking the quietest, safest corner of any room. I followed him and slid into the booth across from him. He immediately brightened, scanning the menu like it was the most thrilling thing he’d seen all day.

The owner walked up to us shortly after. A gentle older woman with glasses hanging on the tip of her nose. “What can I get you two tonight?”

Aiden lifted his head with the enthusiasm of a golden retriever. “I’ll like the waffles topped with fresh berries, bananas, peaches, a little bit of whipped cream and maybe a dusting of powdered sugar.”

I stared at him with wide eyes.

He caught my expression and kicked me lightly under the table. I just laughed, shaking my head as I turned to the owner.

“I’ll have the pancakes, with butter and syrup please. And two cups of tea. Thank you.”

The owner smiled and collected the menus, leaving us in the warmth of the diner.

Aiden leaned forward, resting his elbows on the table. “Pancakes, really? That’s boring.”

I gave him a mocking look. “Yeah right. Says the man who is downing sugar like a toddler with a sweet tooth.”

“That’s because I do have a sweet tooth,” he shot back dramatically, rolling his eyes. “And I don’t think that can ever change.”

I laughed. “Honestly, i still can’t get used to the fact that you do.”

I leaned across the table and kissed him. It was soft, and slow, because he gets shy when affection comes too suddenly. And just like I expected, he blushed, reddening ears, pink cheeks, and a shy smile. It was literally one of my favorite things in the world.

“So,” I whispered, brushing my thumb over his cheek, “do you really want to hear why I’m so in love with you, Mr. Vale?”

His eyes widened, and he nodded like a kid waiting for story time.

“Well, I’ll tell you for free.” I leaned back a little, letting the words come from the place they always lived, my heart. “I love you, and that has never changed, no matter whatever happened between us. You’ve always been the one my heart chose, the one my heart wants, the one it desires. And even though we’ve had our shortcomings, our misunderstandings, our struggles, it doesn’t change the fact that the heart wants, what the heart wants. And mine chose you Aiden.

“I’m not bothered about whether you’re perfect or not, because guess what! Neither am I. So don’t ever sell yourself short by saying I could have had someone better. Because you’re all I ever wanted, and you’re all I’m ever going to need.”

Aiden blinked, his lips parting as if he was trying to find the right words to say, just then when the owner returned with our plates. We thanked her, and before I could even pick up my fork, Aiden took a bite of my food first, our long-standing habit. He hummed approvingly and only then went back to his sugary tower.

Halfway through the meal, he placed his fork down, wiped his mouth slowly, and looked at me with a more serious expression.

“Can I ask you something, Jamie? I don’t mean to pry or anything, but I got curious about what you said earlier.”

I paused mid-bite.

“So you said technically Jason is like the only family you’ve got left, and from what I understand by that, it means you have other family members, but he’s the only one you have left for some reason. Do you mind if I ask why that is? It’s okay if you don’t want to answer though, but I just want to know.”

I stared at him for a moment, breathing slowly as I weighed the question. It wasn’t a secret, it just wasn’t something I loved revisiting. But Aiden was looking at me like he was holding my heart in his hands and wanted to make sure he didn’t hurt it.

So I answered.

“I have an older brother, and my dad, and my little niece, who I miss so so much.” My voice dropped. “So after my older brother Jeremy leaked the information about you to the media, I got really upset and we got into a heated argument and I decided to cut ties with them.”

Aiden’s brows pulled together.

“I’ve never had a good relationship with them growing up,” I continued. “It has always been unstable and shaky, mainly because they never really accepted me for who I am. So when they pulled that stunt, that was the last straw. Afterwards, I decided to move out and Jason helped me by getting this place, so… it’s just been him ever since.”

I took another bite of pancake even though my throat felt tight. Aiden just stared at me, processing, hurting for me, loving me in that quiet way he does.

“Jamie…” he whispered finally. “I’m so sorry. I had no idea you had such difficulties growing up or now. I never knew you were fighting your own battles, I wish I was there for you.”

He reached across the table and held my hand, squeezing gently.

I smiled. “It’s fine, babe. It’s in the past. It doesn’t hurt anymore.”

He shook his head slowly. “Baby… I know it’s not in my place to meddle or give you advice about your personal family affairs, but cutting ties with your family is extreme. I know you had your reasons, and you were hurt, but maybe you should consider finding a way around it instead. I mean they’re your family after all, and if we are being honest, you can’t just cut ties with family so easily. And if not for anything, do it for your niece. You said you missed her a lot, and I’m sure she misses you too. So just promise me you’ll think about it”. He said, looking at me with those eyes he knows I can’t say no too. 

“Aiden…” I sighed. “Poodle, this is emotional blackmail and you know I can’t say no when you look at me like that. But this is different, this is harder than just—”

He smirked. “I know, baby. But I’m not asking you to do it immediately. I just want you to think about it, take as much time as you want. What matters is that you eventually do the right thing. And although you may not want to admit it right now, you do know what the right thing is.”

He winked and took the last bite of his waffle. I shook my head dramatically, as he dropped his fork. 

“You’re not going to drop this, are you?”

He shook his head stubbornly.

“Fine,” I sighed. “I’ll think about it. And hopefully do what’s right. Is that okay?”

His whole face lit up. “Thank you.” He mouthed, before taking a sip of his tea. 

We finished our meal, talked about random things for a while, enjoyed the scenery, the quiet atmosphere, the warm air, listened to the genuine laughter of the people who walked in and out of the diner.

Eventually he stretched, yawning. “Now I feel the tiredness kicking in. I need to rest now since I apparently couldn’t do that at your place because of ‘somebody’.”

I gasped. “No way, no way! Technically I asked you to rest but you decided you wanted trouble instead. It’s not my fault you chose that, over proper rest.” I corrected as he rolled his eyes at me. 

“Anywyas, let me drop you off. I equally have something to get back to, the painting that someone distracted me from, does that ring a bell? I teased, as he blushed again, which made heat pull between my groins but I ignored it. 

“No Jamie. It’s fine. You don’t need to drop me off. I can just get a cab. Meanwhile, it will be too much work for you. Driving down to my hotel then driving back to your place. It’s fine, I can manage” He protested.

“Are you sure Aiden? You know I really don’t mind. I can do anything for you. I teased, as I brought out my wallet and pulled out wands of cash and placed them on the table.

“Oh my gosh Jamie. When did you turn into this 100% obsessed romantic? It’s fine. He chuckled. “I can manage and you know you didn’t have to sort the bill right? I could’ve easily handed that too”

I scoffed, ignoring him as we gathered our things and headed outside. The night air was warm, brushing against our skin like a soft cloth.

I hailed a cab for him. “Make sure you give me a call as soon as you get home alright?”  I pulled him in for a kiss before he got into the cab, slow, teasing, and lingering. Then I smacked his ass. His jaw dropped open as he blushed violently.

“You’re impossible,” he muttered, climbing in.

I waited until the cab disappeared before I got into my car, and drove home. Jason was sprawled on the couch reading a book, and his eyes lit up the second I walked in.

“Well, well, look who finally decided to show up.” He sat up dramatically. 

I have avoided his eyes but still went ahead to ask. “What now Jason? If you’re waiting for me to say something don’t bother, because I have nothing to say to you.” I answered as I tied my apron around my waist, sat down and began prepping my materials.

“I wasn’t going to say anything though” he smirked. “Although I was just wondering how much torment and torture, you’ve put this innocent couch and bed through and for who knows how long.” Then he laughed.

My mouth fell open as I threw a brush at him. “O my gosh, Jason. You’re unbelievable. Anyways, I’ve been wanting to ask how’s Malia? I miss her a lot you know. It should be the Christmas holidays soon right? Maybe she can come visit.”

Jason shut his book slowly. “Well, she always asks about you, you know like every time, and I have run out of answers and excuses to give to her whenever she does. Although the holiday thing isn’t bad though, but for that to happen, you’d need to go through Jeremy first, And last I checked, you two aren’t on speaking terms.”

I moved lightly in my chair, my gaze still focused on the canvas.

“Dad misses you too, Jamie. Even though he pretends not to. He always ask about you and even though I claim not to have an idea where you are, he knows that a lie. So it’s probably none of my business but, why don’t you just visit them and trash this whole thing out once and for all and make up. 

“I’m sure they’ve learned their lesson by now, and they know better.” He said more firmly. 

I didn’t speak, I just listened. Maybe because I didn’t have the right words to say or maybe because I didn’t know what to say. I would be lying if I said what they did it to me didn’t hurt, it still did but maybe it was finally time to leave the past in the past, and to focus on the future. 

I nodded slowly and smiled. 

“Yeah maybe, I should do that.”