Chapter 99

Things have been so great between Derek, and I am shocked how life can be so wonderful. I decided to set a date for us to get married. Derek wanted me to plan a wedding, so I figured fine. Not planning something that is too big, I really don't know very many people. I invited Betty and Aubrey, which I am so excited to see them. Even though Aubrey was paid to watch over me, I still see her as my friend.

Today my mother and I go to pick out my dress. She came back to New York with us just so she could take me dress shopping. I am so excited to go with her our relationship has been getting stronger. I am really not sure what happened, but my mother has changed. I decided to have the wedding in Alaska my dad is doing some of the planning their. I am not so good at planning, so he decided to help which I am grateful for.

As we are getting ready to walk out the door, I see Jill she's holding Faithlyn I give her a kiss and say “I love you be good for grandma Jill until we get back.”

My mom stops me and looks at us, I am wondering if my words might have upset her. She then looks at me “Amelia, why don't we all go together?”

I look at Jill “that is ok with me if you would like to come with us, I don't mind at all.”

“I think it would be nice for you and your mother to spend some quality time together I don't mind staying back.”

My mother looks at Jill “that is nonsense we should all go together We all are going to be joined into a family why not get to know each other.”

My mother is making it hard for Jill to refuse I wonder if she really feels that way about all of us getting to know each other. Or if she just does not want to be with me alone. I don't want any issues to arise, so I try to encourage Jill to go.

“All right well let me go and get changed then we all will go together Jill replies.

Not having a bag ready for Faithlyn I look at my mother “I am going to get a diaper bag packed for Faithlyn I will be back.”

I don't know what is going on, but I am just going with it, I really don't want any drama right now. I honestly don't know how to take this new person who my mother has become. I am unable to read her like I was able to read my mother before. As I am walking up the stairs' dizziness overcomes me, I almost fall. Not sure what the hell is going on just knowing these past two trips have been awful. I haven't been feeling the greatest, but I don't want it to interfere with our happiness, so I keep it to myself. Knowing that if I don't start feeling better, I'm going to have to go get checked. I just hope Derek does not get mad for me not telling him sooner.

As I finally make it upstairs I go to my room, I sit down on my bed and relax for a minute. I feel so light-headed I don't really want to ruin the day. I go grab Faithlyn's diaper bag and I start packing it. As I get everything together, I head back downstairs, and I see everyone waiting. I then put Faithlyn's diaper bag over my shoulder I smile and look at everybody are we ready to go now.

As we are walking out to the car, I'm excited and nervous all at once. I can't wait to just get this over with I'm not a one that really loves to shop. We all get into the care Derek got his driver to take us wherever we want to go. I'm really not sure where to go I don't know of any stores that sell wedding dresses. So, I just say, “take us where we can look and hopefully buy a wedding dress.”

I want to get this over with my mom is making me feel somewhat uncomfortable. I'm not really sure what is going on with her, I want to come out and just ask her, but I don't want to create issues. So, I just focus on Faithlyn tickling her loving hearing her giggles. She is so beautiful Derek says that she looks like me, but I think she looks like him.

As we continue to drive what seems like forever Faithlyn falls asleep, which I'm happy that she is getting a little nap in. I'm also getting sleepy from the drive not allowing myself to fall asleep knowing if I do I'm not going to want to wake up let alone dress shop.

Jill then looks at me and breaks the silence “so Amelia what kind of dress are you looking for?”

“I just want something plain not to long knee-length would be great, but ankle length would be fine too. I would like an off-white maybe with some lace would be nice too as my sleeves.”

“That sounds beautiful hopefully we can find something to your liking today.”

“I think we will have no problem finding something.”

I have never really been a dressy type of girl I really don't care what I wear. Derek wants me to have a wedding, so I'm just trying to make him happy. The dress really is no big deal, even though it is to most women that get married. I really just want something simple. Maybe try to find a little dress for Faithlyn that is not exactly the same as mine, but similar.

I look over to my mom I see her just staring out the window I put my hand on her shoulder. “Mother is everything ok?”

She looks at me and smiles “yes sweetheart everything is fine just enjoying the beautiful scenery.”

“Okay, I just wanted to make sure everything was ok.”

As the car is coming to a stop, I look out, and I see the store, surprised that it is just a little boutique. I start to get nervous, knowing it is time to pick out the dress I will be wearing on the best day of my life. I'm happy that we are getting out of this car my ass feels numb. I am starting to get a little excited to pick out a dress I go and get Faithlyn out of the car and grab her bag, and we got to walk in.

As soon as we walk into the door. I pretty lady walks up to us hello welcome to Holly's dresses how can I help you today?”

My mother answers, surprising us both. “My daughter is getting married, so we are on the search for her wedding dress.”

“Well let's go over to my section, and we will try to figure out what kind of dress that you're looking for and go from there.

We walk over to her section on the way I see so many dresses they are all so beautiful but not really for me, though. As we are sitting down getting ready to talk, she begins to introduce herself.

“Hello my name is Amanda I will be assisting you hopefully finding your dream dress. So, what all are you looking for?”

“I would just like something simple in an off-white knee to ankle length, maybe with lace selves. Also, maybe a little dress for Faithlyn that is similar to mine.”

“Ok, well, I'm going to get some measurements, and then I will go get some dresses for you to try on.”

“Ok, that is fine.” So, I stand to allow her to get what measurements that she needs to get. I look at everyone I can see that they are excited for me, even my mother.

I walk back to sit with everyone until she brings some dresses out. I am excited to see what she finds, hoping that it doesn't take too long to pick out a dress I'm really not feeling the greatest I'm feeling so light-headed.

She then walks up to me “Alright Ms. Amelia are you ready to try on some dresses. If you need any help, I'm her to assist.”

I stand up when I see Amanda coming back with her hands full of dress. Wondering if my dress will be in that pile of clothes.

I take the dresses out of her hand and place them in the dressing room. As I am putting dress on after dress, I am starting to get a little irritable and tired. Now I realize how hard it is to find the perfect dress because all these other dresses just are not me. As I go to put the last dress on I look in the mirror I finally found it I love it.

I walk out to show everybody the dress my mother's eyes turn bright and so does Jill's. I realize I have found the dress I turn around, look in the mirror and do a little dance. I look at them and say, “I think I found the dress this is the dress I want to wear on my wedding day.”

All of a sudden, dizziness takes over my body, I can't control it. I start to stumble trying to regain my stability, but I can't. Then everything just goes black.