Chapter 123 Grieving
Calhoun's POV
Today is Stewart's funeral. It's been five days since he was murdered by Natalie.
Sadly, he doesn't have any family members. Just a few acquaintances and I figured that he wasn't in any pack, which means he was a rogue the whole time.
Still, he's being mourned. The little time he spent here made people grow fond of him, and they're still having a hard time accepting that he's dead. Because he showed up a month ago and ended up dying so quickly.
Kristen is in deep regret for not spending enough time with her
father more than she did. She keeps blaming herself over his death.
She's not herself anymore. She's lost weight because she's been starving. Something that isn't right for her and the baby.
And there's nothing I can do because she doesn't even listen to me.
Right now, we're about twenty at the cemetery. Just me, Kristen, Bruce, Kristen's friends, and roughly fifteen people who are gathered for Stewart's funeral.
Kristen hasn't spoken a word to me or anyone since we came. She's been sobbing and loudly blowing her nose into a hankie, from time to time.
She cried so much that I feared for her because I have never seen anyone cry as much as she did. Her friends are holding her, offering her the comfort that they can, and I am in relief that she let them hold her.
Stewart was her father who showed up unexpectedly and seemed to have a huge impact on our lives. At first, we all underestimated and doubted him, but later we all figured that he wasn't even an awful person. Just a man who wanted to build a relationship with his only child.
And then he got murdered by the woman he had a child with.
My throat gets thick as Stewart's coffin is being carried by four men and taken and they take a short walk to the grave before putting it aside.
If only he hadn't offered to go in search of Kristen, he would still be alive today. And there would have been no funeral.
Had I known, I would have stopped him. He was not as powerful as Bruce because Bruce wouldn't let himself get stabbed by Natalie.
Kristen's eyes are still puffy and she's been avoiding me during this time she's mourning her father. I am giving her the space she wants even though it doesn't settle well with me. She's silent but I need no one to tell me she's still blaming herself over her father's death.
I can tell she's reminiscing about the short time she spent with her father, how he was trying to bond with her because he felt guilty for being away for twenty-one years. It's saddening to know he didn't get to meet his grandchild.
And Kristen still having a hard time accepting the fact that he's dead and he will be lowered into his grave, where he will be buried and a headstone will be placed to remember him.
Am I selfish, to be relieved that it isn't my mate who's in the coffin? Because Natalie was trying to murder Kristen when Stewart showed up and when he heard the tearful voice of his daughter, he ran to save her, only to get killed.
I am not sure I would have been able to live with myself if Kristen had been killed by her own mother.
Who on earth could have thought that Natalie could actually kill someone? I don't even want to think she's mentally unstable because she knew what she was doing, since she still went to Kristen's side with the piece of wood, right after she murdered Stewart.
On the contrary, I can't help but feel I am mostly at fault. If only I had called off the wedding with Natalie, immediately after I found out Kristen was my mate, maybe, just maybe things wouldn't have escalated to this extent. It's because of me Natalie drugged Kristen and tried to kill her.
At last, Stewart's coffin gets lowered into his grave and then it's covered with mud.
I notice the way Kristen's body is shuddering unendingly. It's her first time having such an experience and so she's having a hard time at this moment.
She's lost a parent who genuinely loved her and never for once hurt her.
Kristen needs me now more than ever. I don't care about anything else right now, my mate needs me to comfort her.
I leave my side, walk until I am standing in front of her and upon seeing me, her friends take the hint to leave.
Kristen's body trembles against mine when I wrap her in a hug, and surprisingly she doesn't pull away from it.
"It could have been me, Calhoun," she sobs.
"Don't say that," I am being careful with my words right now, so I won't worsen the way she feels.
"Mom was going to kill me when he came," Kristen pulls away from the hug and tips her head to look at me, the tears still raining down
her cheeks.
"He wanted to rescue you," I put my hands on her shoulders.
And she shook her head.
"It hurts so badly that he just came into my life, only to get killed by Mom," Kristen shut her eyes tightly in their sockets and wailed.
Quickly, I embrace her and let her cry as much as she can on my chest. While I clench my jaw because I hate that she's hurting this much because when she hurts, I hurt too. She's my mate, after all, I am able to feel her emotions.
I stroke Kristen's back, rendering her comfort as much as I can because she's been so stressed by her emotions these few days. She didn't only withdraw from me, she shut herself from the world. But now, I am relieved that she's being vulnerable in my arms.
"I can't believe he's gone," Kristen's voice is shaky as she lets this
out amidst her sobs.
"He'll be missed and you'll be fine," I assured her.