Chapter 41

Zachary's POV:

Happiness, intensity and sensuousness. That's all I felt as I kissed her and wrapped my arms around her waist. With a jerk, I pulled her closer to me. I heard her gasp as I did that and angled my head to get the perfect access to her lips. As expected, her lips were so soft, and due to water running over us, her lips were moist, which made me even crazier, and I kissed her deeply and passionately, pouring the feelings of my heart into the kiss. For minutes, she stood there in shock and as I was going to pull away, I felt her hand on the back of my head and I felt her other hand wrapping on my torso as she moved closer and she moved her lips, kissing me.

My heartbeat raced and I moved my hand, feeling her body under my touch. I wanted to take her then and there. We were kissing hard when I moved and sandwiched her body between mine and the wall. I kept both of my hands on the wall and felt as she moved her on my body feeling my abs and muscles. She gasped when I squeezed her waist and then slowly I started kissing her face and neck, but then realization hit me.

My eyes jerked open and I moved backward.

Oh shit!

What did I do?

She was panting hard and she stood leaning against the wall with her eyes closed. I pulled my hair in frustration. What did I do?

Why did I do that?

Regret flashed through my body as I hurriedly turned around and turned the shower off. Raking a hand through my wet hair, I walked out of the bathroom. As I came out, I leaned against the wall and put my hand on my mouth. “What did I do?” I felt like crying.

She is not even sober, and I kissed her. What will she even think when she gets to know this once she is sober. She would probably hate me even more or worst, she would claim to be sent back her home. What will I do if she asks me to send her back? I can’t lie to myself anymore. I know what has happened to me, and I don’t want to run away from it any longer, but not like this. Not, like this.

I regretted kissing a drunk woman. She would probably hate me even more. Even if she asks me to go back home, I don’t really think that I can stop her. After everything that she has gone through, I don’t think it would be a good option to restrain her from any rights and what I just did.

It’s my entire fault. I let my attraction towards her have control over me. I let my emotions control me. This is not good, not for me, not for her.

“This is no—“ I stopped when I felt two hands wrap around my torso.

“Juli—" She cut me off and hush me.

“Juliette, let me go! You are drunk!” I said and tried to pry her hands from around me, but she tightened her grip even more and clutched my soaked shirt, denying to let go of me.

“It is not correct—"

“Then what is correct?” she asked me and turned me around.

“You are drunk! You'll hate me tomorrow for doing this to you. Understand!” I said, as I held her beautiful face and caressed her cheeks, using my thumb.

“I could never hate you,” she said as she grabbed my hand and leaned into my touch.

“No, this is not good.” I jerked my hands away from her touch and turned around, walking towards the door. If I stood any longer, then I would no longer be able to control myself. The woman was trying to seduce me. Alcohol turns an innocent and naïve woman into a fierce seductress.

“Zachary!” she called, but I didn’t stop. I sped up and walked towards the door, just wanting to get away. The temperature in the room was suddenly high; all I wanted was to move away, far away from the woman whom I respected the most. I no longer had any intention to hurt her mentally or physically, though what I did earlier was just to save her and keep her oblivious to what was going around her, but this was just too much. I can’t hurt her. If I do, then I know I would only end up hurting myself. If she hurt, I was hurt too. There was a sudden pain in my chest, and I knew that my heart was hurting thinking that she would hate me when she realizes what I did.

Get away, Zachary! Get away.

“Zachary!” I heard her and even felt the hurt in her voice as she called my name.

Just walk! If you stop, then she will be more hurt than you could ever imagine. She is a bird, don’t cage her, let her fly, for it is for her betterment. You are darkness, and you will only end up dragging the fragile angel into your dark world. Even though she will be there with you, you can never have her. She is a bird so let her fly away. Away from the darkness, away from the monster within you.

“Zac!” That made me stop instantly with my hand on the doorknob. Shock, and another strange feeling coursed through my body as I stood there silently. This was the first time she called me by a name only my mom uses when I ignore her. The feeling of closeness and something new surrounded me.

“I said stop!” came her voice, and then I heard footsteps, the clicking of heels as she walked closer to me.

“I said stop. Please!” she begged, and then again I felt her hands on my back as she leaned against me. I closed my eyes, feeling her touch on my body.

“Juliette!” I sighed and turned around, ready to make her understand that this is not possible, but then stopped when I saw her eyes. She let tears fall down her cheeks.

“You rejected me,” she cried and sobbed, shedding her tears as she looked up at me.

“No, no!” I inched forward and held her and kissed her forehead.

“I am not in the position to reject you, Juliette! You are higher than me,” I said and hugged her and felt as she reciprocated the act, as she snuggled her face into my chest.

“I am nothing in your eyes!” she wailed, and I withdrew from the hug.

“Who told you that? You are the most beautiful woman I have ever met in my life, and I respect you because I love—" I stopped mid-sentence realizing what I was just about to say.

Before I could correct myself or say anything, I felt her thrashing my body to the door, and she pulled my collar and captured my lips, kissing me passionately and possessively. I thought of pushing her away, but I was too shocked to even move my hands. Then like a hurricane, as fast she came, she let go of me and looked up at me, while we both panted and gasped for air. I looked at the passion and desire burning up in her eyes. I felt the alcohol taste, and I knew that she wasn't yet sober, but then I made a decision which would either mend my life or ruin me completely.

I pulled her closer, and as she didn’t push me away, I kissed her, showing her how much she meant to me. Who even made her think that I don’t care for her? I will show her that if any person means anything to me, it is her. Only her. She wants proof? I will give it to her.

We didn’t even realize when we fell on the bed, and I hovered over her body and kissed her, as she held my head and tried to pull me down. As I trailed soft kisses down her neck and on her cleavage, I felt her body arch up to my touch. I kissed every inch of her skin. I heard her soft moans in my ear.

“Say my name!” I whispered into her ear and bit her lobes, and felt her humming.

“Zachary,” she moaned name, and I moved my hand from her waist to her breast, squeezing it, making her gasp and moan at the same time.

“Oh Zac!” she moaned, and the way my name rolled off of her tongue made me even wilder than I already was. She started unbuttoning my shirt, and I helped her by ripping it and throwing it away. Still in my pants, I parted and raised her legs, and let my dick touch her clothed parts. She jerked up and moaned when I rubbed my body against her, but then I leaned in and kissed her on her chest. Just as she was about to touch me, I got hold of her hands and locked them with mine, and I slowed my pace of kissing her. I had no intention of playing with the emotions of a woman who had no clue or sense to know what was going on.

Now, I don’t even care, but I want her to remember this when she wakes tomorrow morning. I want to let her know that after today, tomorrow will not be the same. The desire that I saw in her eyes made it clear that she wants me like I want her, but I won’t proceed until she tells me to my face that she has also fallen for me. I want her to know that from today onwards, she belongs to me, and I would no longer tolerate her mentioning her ex in front of me. From today on, I will not stop myself from confronting her or a man who tries to get close to her.

From today on, she is mine. Rightfully mine. She will be my everything, and I will do anything for her before she even asks.

“You are my family now,” I smiled as I caressed her cheeks and watched as she breathed softly, sleeping silently next to me in my arms.

“Because I have fallen for you. Hard!” I whispered into her ear, and she snuggled up close to me as I wrapped my arms around her body and held her tight, before falling asleep right next to her.

“Deeply and madly,” I smiled in my sleep.

The next day, as I worked in my study room, I heard the doorknob turning before I heard footsteps. I smiled inwardly, but didn’t let it reflect on my face. I knew it was Juliette, but I didn’t even lookup.

“Zachary,” she said, and I acted as if I didn’t know why she was there. I looked up at her through my reading glasses and showed her the seat in front of me to take a seat.

She put her hair in a side braid, and she was wearing a black top and jeans with a gray cardigan. I noticed the hickeys on her chest and neck, and as soon as she saw my eyes on the hickeys she pulled her cardigan, hiding them from me. She cleared her throat, wanting to gain my attention.

She had no idea that she already has my attention.

“My head hurts!” she said as she held her head and leaned on my table.

“I’m not a doctor. Ask Martha to provide you meds,” I said and looked down, and acted as if I was focusing on my work more than her.

“Always a jerk!” I heard her mutter, which brought a smile to my face.

“Umm, I am here to ask you something else!” she said and I looked up at her. As if she felt my eyes penetrating her soul, she looked the other way, avoiding eye contact.

“And what is that?” I asked as I leaned against my chair and crossed my arms across my chest.

“Umm. What—What—” she stammered, to which I raised one eyebrow and nodded, urging her to finish.

“What happened y-yesterday?” she asked, stuttering and looking at me.

I narrowed my eyes at her and pulled the glasses off my eyes.

“You don’t remember?” I challenged her with my gaze.

She shifted in her seat, scratched her forehead and pursed her lips. She looked nervous, and the nervousness proved that she remembered some parts of it at least, like why she had all of those marks on her body.

“No, I don’t!” she said and I nodded, but smirked at her. I then turned my face into a neutral one when she looked at me.

“Liar!” I thought.

“Well, then how will I know what happened with you? The only parts I remember are that you drank to the point where you couldn’t stand, and before you could make a fool out of yourself, I saved you by bringing you home. Then you slept, tired from your actions,” I said and acted as calm and cool I could. I skipped some parts, because I know she remembers them. Though not everything, guessing by her actions, I hoped she remembered some parts of it.

“Th-that's it?” she asked and narrowed her eyes, challenging me to tell the whole thing.

As if?

“Yeah! That’s it!” I gave her a nod and smiled.

“Oh! Fine!” She was now glaring at me, and I had to pinch my thigh from stopping myself from laughing.

She stood up and smiled sarcastically at me to which I returned with a genuine one of mine. As she walked towards the door, I checked her swaying ass and bit down on my knuckles.

I have decided that until she comes forward and tells me how she feels about me, I won’t show her any affection. Just because I have fallen for her doesn’t mean that I will kneel before her. For me, a relationship is about equality. She must love me as much as I do, and I will make sure that she understands that. Until she tells me what I am to her, she will keep on witnessing the ruthless and jerk of a Zachary. Once, she tells me how she feels, I promise to myself she will forget how she ever fell in love with that rat, Nicholas. She will see the hidden side of me, which will only love and cherish her until death.

I smiled to myself when she stopped right before the door, and looked back at me, muttering something under her breath. She looked clearly pissed.