Comfort Place

Comfort Place
Angelo

Watching Tatiana kill Oleg had me paralyzed for a moment, but when she stumbled backward, her legs wobbling, I noticed she was just about to faint. I rushed to grab her, pulling her into my arms and taking her away from his body.

Feeling her tremble, sobbing uncontrollably, made me aware of how hard tonight had been on her. She put on a brave face, and managed everything so well, that I could feel nothing more than pride. But once I got her away from the mansion, and realized she had endured much more than I realized at first, I felt powerless. 

I didn’t manage to protect her like I wanted. And no matter how often I remind myself that she doesn’t need my protection, that she can handle herself well enough, I still hate myself for allowing her to be put through all of this.

Getting beaten by Oleg, having to kill people to get justice for her family, and staining her soul makes me feel like shit.

The entire drive back to Staten Island, I debated with myself. I wanted to get home and take care of her, attend to her injuries, and shower her with love and affection in the way she deserves.

I also wanted to wait for a better moment to confess my love for her, but the words flew out of my mouth before I had the chance to stop myself. I just had spent the whole night regretting not telling her how I felt before, and as soon as I took her away from that horror house, I had to make sure she knew how I felt.

Hearing those three words back was like a soothing balm to my shattered heart.

I never thought I would be able to love someone as much as I love Tatiana, nor did I think I am deserving of that kind of love.

But now that I have her, I’ll make sure I never let go of her.

As soon as we get to the safehouse, I help her out of the car and take her upstairs to her room.

I don’t give my mind enough time or space to think about all that happened tonight. Not even the fact that Oleg is dead has settled in yet. I’m sure it will come to me once I relax, but there’s still too much adrenaline running through my system at this moment for me to be able to focus on that reality.

“Do you want me to prepare a hot bath for you?” I offer quietly as soon as we step into the bedroom.

She sits down on the bed and looks up at me, and that’s when I can finally see the wound in her neck, caused by Oleg’s knife. It doesn’t seem deep, but it could easily get infected if not treated properly. Her cheek is also reddened from the punch, and her lip is slightly split, dry blood covering the wound.

I clench my fists beside me as I wait for her answer, not daring to say anything else. I’m on the edge of losing my control again after seeing her hurt like this, but there’s nothing I can do now to vent it. Oleg is dead, and there’s no one left for me to beat, or kill.

Yakov is in the back of my mind, but I need to force myself to focus on the here and now. The fact that he wasn’t seen during our mission is pulling at my heart, leaving me uneasy. He’s not anywhere close to his father in terms of evilness and skills, but it doesn’t mean he’s not powerful. 

He can still get the Rominas after Tatiana and the Saints. I told her all is over, but it isn’t. Not completely at least.

“I… yeah, I think that would be great,” she finally answers me, and I head for the bathroom to fill the tub.

When I return, she has already removed most of her clothes and is standing in the middle of the room in nothing but her bra and panties. The dirty clothes tainted with blood and the bulletproof vest are set aside in the corner of the room, but there are no signs of her weapons anywhere.

I can only assume she left them back at the Romina mansion, but I don't bother to ask her. The last thing she needs to think of right now are the weapons she left behind.

“Do you need me to get you anything?” I ask, watching as she walks past me, into the bathroom. As soon as she crosses the threshold, I notice some bruises on her back, and I have to swallow the lump in my throat and look away.

She turns to face me, and under the dim light, I notice her swollen eyes from crying. 

I wish I could take all the pain away from her and suffer it all by myself because it kills me to have to see her like this. But I can’t do that. 

“Can you stay here with me? I don’t want to be alone,” she pleads in a whisper.

I nod, closing the door behind me and following her. She removes the rest of her clothes and steps into the tub, and I pull a small stool from under the sink and place it close to her.

“What will happen now?” she asks as she starts washing her arms, rubbing her skin to get rid of all the dirt and blood. I hand her a sponge, and after she pours some liquid soap on it, she returns to her task.

“I don’t know yet,” I tell her honestly. “We need to wait for the others to hear the complete report. I don’t know what else happened after I found you, and they stayed behind to… check on everything.”

Tatiana nods but remains silent, moving the sponge to her neck and face. She is careful so as not to touch her wound. I get up, moving to grab the first aid kit from the bathroom cabinet.

“Let me clean that for you,” I offer, gesturing to her neck.

My adrenaline is starting to wear off, and my body is beginning to show signs of exhaustion. When I move my arm in a particular angle, pain shoots through me, and I’m reminded I was shot. Unconsciously, I move my hand to hold my shoulder. Tatiana’s eyes follow my action, and they widen as she realizes I’m hurt.

“Angelo!” she shrieks in shock, kneeling in the tub so she can get closer to me. Her soft fingers touch my shoulder, and I wince, but I don’t move away from her. I let her check the damage that has been done, unwilling to do it myself.

I don’t even know if the bullet is still inside me or not, but I can’t force myself to think about it now.

“Oh my God! You were shot,” she declares, her voice cracking with concern.

“It's fine.” But when I try to shrug, another wave of pain washes over me, and I hiss. “Okay, it hurts like hell, but I won’t die. I’ll get it treated as soon as the guys get here. Don’t worry,” I assure her, offering a small smile as I wait for the sting to go away.

It feels like my entire arm is burning and being pulled out of its socket, but I hang in there, not wanting to worry her anymore.

Tears well in her eyes again as she looks at me, her chin trembling. I’m not in so much pain that I don’t find her absolutely adorable.

“Hey, come on. Let’s finish this bath and get us both something to eat. I’m starving.” 

I’m not, really, but I just want her to think about something else for a change. 

She seems about to refuse me but ends up sitting back in the tub and finishing her bath. A few minutes later, I help her out, wrapping her in a robe, and once we’re back in the bedroom, I pull her into my arms, hugging her close to me.

Her scent invades my senses, and I allow myself to close my eyes for a minute, giving my body the comfort it so desperately needs.

She is here. She is safe. She is mine.

That’s all the reassurance I need after tonight.

“Listen,” I start, pulling her away just enough for me to look into her beautiful blue eyes, “I know a lot is going through your mind right now, but I want you to promise me one thing. When you feel like it is too much for you to handle, come talk to me. I know how dark and deep our minds can go in this kind of business, but I don’t want you to feel like you’re alone. I’ll be here to share the pain with you.”

Tatiana swallows hard and nods, her eyes roaming my face. “I promise. I just…” she stammers but composes herself almost immediately. “I just don’t know what to do now. The last weeks have been all about going after justice, or vengeance, or whatever you want to call it. I fear I might feel like it wasn’t worth it at some point, or even struggle to find out who I am without this fight, you know?”

“I do,” I agree, squeezing her shoulders lightly. “I really do. But you shouldn’t let your mind go there. You did what you had to do, and now it’s time to figure out what you want your life to be like. And I’ll be here to help you find your way whenever you get lost.”

A sob escapes her as she leans her head against my chest once more. I run my fingers through her wet hair, hoping to calm her heart and mind with that simple gesture.

“We’ll figure it out together,” I add in a murmur, placing a soft kiss on her head.

Even though my entire body is sore, and my shoulder feels like I’m being stabbed over and over, holding Tatiana like this makes it all feel worth it.