What Remains After Fire

What Remains After Fire
  My throat tightened. Well, that seemed like a reasonable consequence to giving out a piece of your soul to save someone.
  I shifted my eyes to find Ethan watching him lose the fight as Vorare enjoyed making a ragdoll out of him. I would root for Ethan to win, but I could feel his intentions. He wanted to lose the fight if it meant a chance to end Vorare and the threat he posed to me further.
  “What an idiot,” A smile tugged at my lips as tears burned my eyes.
  It was ridiculous, the need for the people around me to constantly try to sacrifice themselves for a future I didn't want. To think he'd want to die without saying goodbye to me.
  For the first time since my parents' demise, I finally let down the guard in my mind to let Ethan know my feelings.
  Mustering the last of my strength, I slowly rose, knowing Ethan was close enough to finalizing his decision. He hesitated as his head momentarily turned my way. His auburn eyes burned with surprise as he watched my approach.
  He halted his fight, standing painfully still, so I hastened my pace to reach him in time.
  I held out my hand as Vorare approached with his pair of bark-like limbs. Ethan didn’t move. He only waited for me as he had been doing for months.
  So I reached for him this time and held him tightly, pressing the necklace on my neck between us. “You're such an idiot, you know,” I placed my head on his chest to hear his heartbeat, to memorize every thrum of it.
  “I know,” he wrapped his arms around me, and my body spread with the warmth I had been desperately wanting. “I love you, Harlyn. Being an idiot comes with the price of loving you.“
  The thrusting sound of something impaling his body met my ears, but I tried not to focus on it or the way his breathing grew slower and energy thrummed in his body.
  Instead, I told him, “I love you too, Ethan,” and I reached past the necklace into my heart as my mom had done and pulled a piece of me to save him.
  Whatever happened after was a blur of passing memories.
  I could still faintly remember the light that exploded outward, Ethan, and the overwhelming heat that burned me as it did. I remembered feeling the cold after I'd used a piece of my soul to fill the hole left behind in his chest.
  Vorare's throes of death had torn through the sky as my sorcery poured out of me, but somehow Ethan's heartbeat rang louder.
  Despite feeling like I'd died myself, Ethan's gentle whispers kept me grounded for a while, to hold on to him as he cried, to scold me for what I did.
  Regardless of his obvious displeasure with my decision, I knew he understood that I would still do it all over again. Because he made it, and that was what mattered to me.
  But it had been far too long now, and I missed him.
  Recognizing the dreamscape again took a long while. It might’ve been days or weeks. I couldn't tell, for I was awake for what felt like an endless night. Time didn’t move here as I drifted with an emptiness that weighed in my chest where a rhythm used to be.
  I had only my wolf for company, but even she was haunted by the reality of our decision. After all, she wasn't here. The side of me that bled away with the piece of me I gave.
  At some point, drifting itself felt tiring, and I simply lay on the forest ground. So I stayed still with my cheek pressed to the moss, waiting for the day I'd feel whole enough to open my eyes.
  One day, as I hoped, something new stirred in the space, and I recognized her.
  I lifted my head slowly, and there she stood in the clearing of daffodils. The haunting version of me with milky white eyes and pale skin, a little too flawless.
  She wore no hateful expression this time, nor was her anger licking at her small grin. She stood calmly, almost too calmly. It was the kind of calm that came with goodbyes.
  “You gave away a part of yourself,” my voice rang out to meet my ears in a hushed, reverent whisper. “To save your lover and a town that barely liked you.”
  I sat up, releasing a shaky breath. My form felt like it was made of hollow glass. “You say that like it wasn’t worth it.”
  “Was it?” she tilted her head gently, her hair swaying softly to her sides.
  I stood up straight. “Yes.”
  She hummed, leaving the silence to stand between us for what felt like forever.
  “Why didn't you run?“ She suddenly inquired.
  Running was the last thing I wanted to do. Everyone around me prioritized my escape, but they had only succeeded in leaving me alone by doing so. “I had the chance to control my fate for the first time, so I did. I’ve run enough.”
  Another silence sat between us. Even my wolf stayed still with her ears pinned back.
  What else was there to say? I doubted I could justify betraying myself like that, but was it really betrayal if I did it for someone who loved me just as much as he gave his entire life?
  There was nothing more to say, so I crossed the space between us and pulled her into my arms to hold her firmly. She felt cold, really cold. I could tell she was fading away.
  Slowly, my doppelganger wrapped her arms around me. “You don’t have to keep hating me,” I whispered. “Not anymore. I didn’t break this time.“
  “No,” she uttered. “You didn’t.”