Chapter 153: His Fault

“They granted me one day bail. What was the emergency? Whose funeral is this?”

My heart skipped a beat when I heard Asad’s nonchalant tone, scanning the place.

Gathering my courage, I rose from my seat, placing my hand over his shoulder.

“Saira…”

“Huh?”

Taking a deep breath, I opened my mouth to repeat everything in detail.

“Zakir-”

But, not giving me a moment, he punched me across my jaw with a scowl emerging on his face.

“I heard you the first time, asshole!”

“Asad!”

Gasping, everyone was about to come in between to stop him but he grabbed my collar and yanked me forward with a glare, causing me to lower my gaze in shame.

“You have failed as a protector, Zaviyaar. An outsider had come for our aid, we had to rely on someone else for protection.”

Hissing, he pushed me away, closing the gap with a never ending growl to remind me of my fatuous actions.

“Why the fuck did you go to France in the first place!?”

The actions which had stumbled my home’s pillars, my remorse.

“Didn’t you know I was absent!? That it gave him an opening to attack us!? What were you thinking!?”

“I was thinking nothing, that is why I did it!!”

He looked away and took a deep breath before glancing over his shoulder and hit me where it hurt the most.

“In fact, the first blessing in the past two decades. We were having one happiness and now it’s gone too.”

My lips quivered with a tear in the corner, “It’s all your fault, Zaviyaar,”

I could feel my hands becoming numb, losing the strength in me by the mention of it.

“Asad, please, don’t say that. Zaviyaar didn’t do anything. We didn’t know-”

At my painful silence, Aalifa spoke up with a groan as she couldn’t move due to her bleeding and pain, holding her hand out but Asad cut her off strictly.

“You don’t know anything, Aalifa Bhabi. First of all, leaving your domain without proper backup was foolish,”

Taking a step closer, he was right before me.

“Second, going to Paris meant he was joining hands with an enemy and it alerted others to weaken him so he couldn’t strengthen.”

His bag still hanging on his shoulder, messy hair and an infuriated gaze.

“Third, he had a family he left without ‘my’ surveillance, exposing not you guys and us to threat too,”

Exhaling, he took a sharp turn and yelled, “Were you not aware of the risks?!”

I whispered feebly, “I was…”

“Then why did you do this!?”

Aalifa’s depression frightened me, her words of me being her sinner, of us being together was wrong were disturbing me.

She melted in feelings… so did I.

I placed everything at risk for her, as the man of the house, it was my obligation to think yet I.. didn’t.

“Zakir was dying for a chance. He had the upper hand because of Saira Bhabi. The second he saw an opportunity, he devoured it.”

Asad was about to lose himself in wrath again but breaking into a sob, Mother slammed her hands down, gaining our attention as she cried sorrowfully.

“Asad! Please!… Don’t,”

“Mother?!”

Panicking at her abrupt wailing we both stopped and turned to her worriedly.

“Please don’t amongst each other, I beg of you,”

With tears rolling down, she shook her head in denial, clutching her chest from anguish of watching her family fall apart.

“We are not. I am merely reminding him of his actions so he thinks multiple times next time,” Asad’s tone softened, rushing to her side.

Bending on his knees on the ground, he took her hand and placed it over his heart to reassure her.

“I apologize if my outburst frightened you. I didn’t mean to yell and create a scene but…” He murmured, gulping down all his feelings and thoughts before returning a glare at me from the corner.

“Zaviyaar should have thought,”

With tears blurring my vision, I found myself at a defenseless edge. Keeping my hands behind me, my broken tone came.

“I am sorry, I am so sorry,”

“Your sorry cannot undo the gunshot Erhan got, revive Saira Bhabi nor your child.” Asad scowled, rising from the ground and walking away.

With a dead silence and minimum people, we did Saira’s funeral. I could feel a hefty weight on my chest, the exhaustion was taking its toll on me.

With a crushing weight on my shoulders, I came to the room where I saw Aalifa who was looking down, hugging her knees close to her chest.

She was sobbing.

“Aalifa…”

Calling her softly, I came closer, placing my hand over her head but I doubt it could console her.

Sniveling, she looked up at me with that miserable expression which evoked the urge to burn everything along with myself in it.

I was so done with everything.

“Zaviyaar, why did this happen? I was trying my best, I swear, I did. I didn’t mean to take away the happiness of you guys,”

She wept, holding my wrist to keep it near her chest accompanied by tears endlessly rolling down.

Narrowing my eyes in compassion, I moved down to hold her as she scooted towards me.

“I was taking proper medicines, I protected my stomach when Zakir kicked too, I was trying to get out of depression too then why did it happen?!”

Crying, she placed her head on my shoulders, gripping onto my desperately as I raked my fingers around her locks to cool her.

“Shh, it’s not our fault. Life and death is not in our hands,”

I made failed endeavors to make her listen. The sound of her weeping pierced through my chest, inducing inexplicable agony in me.

“Are we cursed? Is this because of me?! Why!?”

“Saira, our baby, Erhan… You provoked Zakir because he hurt me... It was indirectly my fault…”

She sobbed, pulling away a little with a lowered gaze.

Clutching the sheet, unable to raise her head anymore when I scooted closer, rubbing her back, kissing the side of her face with purest affection.

“No, it’s not. Don’t blame yourself,”

I kept holding her until she emptied her heart and remained motionless with dried tears glistening on her cheeks.

Weakened, she pulled away gradually from me. Curling like a ball on the bed, she was staring into nothingness.

Seeing her like this was stabbing my chest. Emitting compassion, I was caressing her, tracing my fingers on her shoulder to her hand.

Removing my hand gradually, she mumbled weakly.

“Zaviyaar,”

“Yes?”

“Seeing you will always remind me of all the wrong things I did in my life. Loving you is still my biggest embarrassment and I… can’t carry this anymore.”

An unwanted shiver went down my spine, turning my body numb. I was worried sick in anticipation when she started speaking in a feeble, hollow voice.

“I always murdered that thought before it could enter my mind but I don’t think I could suppress it anymore.”

I gulped hard in horror, “What… Do you mean?”

“Free me from this marriage, Zaviyaar,”