60|I Understand

60|I Understand
~Declan~

This must be what it’s like to be a dandelion, extra lightweight, as if the wind would take me anywhere it desired.

Tempted to repeat what she said, I ask instead. “Are you sure?” because repeating her words might trigger the version of Serena that was hellbent on dying instead of bearing my mark.

She looked up at me, long lashes fluttering. Her cheeks were pink from all the alcohol she had taken. Then she bit her lip, uncertainty coasting her blue eyes as she shook her head. “No… I’m not.”

My hope crashed to the ground like a rocket losing its engine after launch. Either way, I have to be grateful for Serena’s honesty.

“I understand,” I replied. “The more I learn about what happened to you in your exile, the more I accept your anger at me. No words can amount to all the pain I caused you.”

Her eyes grew wide, glazing over as she kept nibbling her lower lip. “It was still selfish of me to hide our daughter from you, Declan… but how can I tell you? Even if I wanted to, I lost her while I was in captivity.”

I shook my head. This version of Serena that I’m talking to was the one I married. She would blame herself even if she wasn’t at fault. “Knowing that you wanted to let me know about our daughter is enough for me.”

She lowered her gaze on the beer bottle in her hand, staggering towards the dark memory she’d rather not think about. “When I found out I was pregnant, I promised to go back to Embercrest to reclaim my pack for her. I didn’t want her to grow up without a father. Even if we were not married anymore, I still want her to know you.”

My chest tightened, and the claws of guilt buried their long talons in my throat. “Serena… I’m fucking sorry.” I bowed my head because how can I look into the eyes of the woman I hurt the most after promising her forever, in sickness and in health? “I’m fucking sorry that I sent Lia to come after you. I should’ve sent Jared.”

There’s that sudden hesitation in her eyes that wasn’t there before when the topic was about Lia. “You said you didn’t know. Are you telling the truth?”

I realized that she can only murmur things about my family when her emotions are high. Now that we are drinking and talking like two old friends, she doesn’t want to pull back the memory of the past. But this was necessary to free both of us from the pain Lia’s lies caused us.

“About my family’s plans to take over Embercrest?” I blew a heavy sigh. “No, Serena. I swear on my life, you can take it if you desire, but no, I did not know.” Now that we are talking about this and she doesn’t seem livid about it, I asked her for more details. “How did you even find out about it?”

My father and I were never on good terms. He saw me as a hindrance to his dream of becoming alpha because granddad would always favor me. Granddad, on the other hand, showed me the tough kind of love, but he never forgot to praise me for excelling in everything I do. Grandad swallowed his pride in knocking at Embercrest’s door. But he did it for our pack, for his family. He was a proud man, and I wouldn’t be surprised if he hated his life in Embercrest. He had to bow down to another alpha all his life.

“It was the day after our wedding. You went out to check the reported intrusion on the south border, remember?” I nodded at her. “Oliver called me to his office before breakfast. He was the same Oliver at first until he blabbered a detail about my parents that only I should know.”

My eyebrows crinkled. Her parents’ death was a sensitive topic for Serena, so even I don’t know much about their accident. “What did he know?”

“He knew where it happened and how my parents died,” Serena’s look turned grim. “He knew that they drowned, Declan.”

Everyone in Embercrest knew it was a car accident, but they died of drowning? Even the council didn’t know that. Serena and John were the first at the scene, and John was practically missing. I only saw him at the Alpha and Luna’s funeral. And John was loyal to Serena’s family.

“They drowned?” I echoed.

She nodded. “We found their car under the Hollow River. There was a part of the bridge over Hollow River that had been ripped apart. Their car probably drove through it, and they weren’t able to unfasten their seatbelts and drowned.”

“Is that really what happened?” I can’t believe it. Alpha Lucein was a smart Alpha. He would be able to slip out of a drowning car before it even sank into the river.

“We found traces of Aconite in their blood,” Serena added. “Oliver also knew this. My father wouldn’t purposely drink something that would hurt him, especially when he was with Mom.”

There were only a few instances in which a shifter would drink aconite. If we wanted to get drunk or if we are wrong in the head. And everyone knows how much Alpha Lucien loved Luna Rebecca. They were like newly mated lovers all the time who couldn’t take their hands off each other, their eyes shooting hearts whenever they looked at one another.

“So you killed him?” I mumbled.

“And I would do it over and over again if I could,” her wolf peeked in her eyes. “I would do it again when I see him in the afterlife.”

I set the empty bottle of beer on the table. The boxes of takeout that we ate were resting untidily on the table as well.

“I cannot speak to granddad about any of this, and my father is a lying bastard, Serena. If I still have time to go back to Embercrest, I will deal with him myself.”

“If?” she asked.

“I don’t have much time, but I know someone who could tell me the truth about what happened in the Hollow Forest.”

“Who?” Her eyebrows curled in curiosity.

“Lia. I know where to find her.”