Nicole Vargas
"What?!"
Ethan stared bewildered at me as he opened his mouth to say something, but immediately closed it again. He stood in the middle of my room following my every movement. He was ready to go for almost an hour and a half now.
Today was my first fashion show and Ethan offered to pick me up. I also found this the right time to finally tell him what has been on my mind for the past couple days. We have spent some time together these past couple days after the whole Veronika drama and how much I hate to admit, some things did not felt right. Forced conversations, awkward encounters, and oh god the amount of sexual tension was getting too much.
I nodded my head at him as I adjusted the straps of my dress. It was a sky blue evening gown designed by me. "Yes, you have heard it right. I want to take a break." I emphasized the last word as I watched myself in the mirror. I definitely would be the center of attention.
"A break?" He repeated, the words rolling bitter out of his mouth. He looked at me in the mirror and I could see the hurt on his face. It pained me, but I expected it. "As in seeing other people?"
"A break does not necessarily mean seeing other people, but if you want to do that, than sure go ahead." I turned around, grabbed my clutch and stuffed my keys and phone in it. I was already fifteen minutes late to my own fashion show, but would it really be a 'Nicole Vargas' fashion show if I didn't arrive fashionably late?
"Why are you so casual about this?" Ethan asked as he frustratingly went with his hand through his hair. His once neatly combed hair looked now disheveled. He loosened his tie as he took a deep breath. "You wanted this all along, didn't you?"
I sighed deeply as I looked up at his distressed but still handsome face. His eyes held all kinds of emotions, it was hard to make out what he was feeling right now. Hurt, anger, betrayal? "I don't want this. I need this. And so do you."
"No, you cannot tell me what I need. And for your information, it's you that I need."
I rolled my eyes at him. That was so cliche. "You will figure that out during our break. It will be good for the both of us, Gray."
"Explain how, Vargas?" he taunted as he clenched his fist. "Explain why we need a break? As far as I know I have been nothing but forgiving, caring, and loving. It's you who has been acting so impossible. I try my best to live life your way, but I don't get the same energy back from you.'
I sighed deeply and walked towards him to fix his tie. I didn't want to get angry. Partly he was right anyway. My fingers trembled as I did.
"We rushed things. We both know that. So let's just... stay single for a while. Let's figure out what we really want. Let's see what fate has in store for us. I still love you. I really do, Ethan. I'm not willing to change for you, or at least not for the moment. You were just someone who was suppose to watch over me. Not fall in love. But look where we are now. You may not think that we need a break, but I know that we do."
The pain flickering in his eyes didn't go unnoticed and something in my heart snapped. But I took a deep breath and tried to stay unaffected. I have thought about this for a long time and I really wanted to go through with it. We both need it for godsake!
"I do not agree with this at all." He mumbled as he looked into my eyes. "But as I already said before, everything for you princess. So once again, I'll grant you your wish."
A tear managed to fall down my cheek, but Ethan was quick enough to wipe it away. I have no idea why I just cried. I have prepared myself for this. Ethan kissed my forehead and let me go. "I hope you know what you're doing. A break is a break, princess. We might not end up together anymore."
I gulped as my chest tightened. So much for staying strong. The idea of us not being together in the future is bothering me. I silently told myself that it will never happen. Somehow I will make sure we will end up together. "Don't say that." I whispered softly as I stroked his cheek softly
Ethan shrugged his shoulders and brushed my hand away. "This is your way of granting me access to love someone else, fuck someone else, marry someone else. Is this what you want?"
"If that happen--" I took a deep breath, deep down hoping it will never happen. The break is to get both our lives back on rails. It is not to develop feelings for someone else. "We were never meant for each other."
Ethan chuckled and shook his head. He stayed silent for a while, studying my facial expression. "Congratulations on your first Fashion show. Your dad must be proud of you, achieving such a milestone in less than a year."
His sudden change of demeanour bothered me.
Ethan then turned around and walked out of my bedroom. I followed him and frowned my eyebrows at this sudden action. "Aren't you going to take me to the fashion show?"
"I changed my mind. I will let my driver take you." He answered curty as he opened the front door and turned around to face me. "Oh and I will send your stuff first thing tomorrow morning." With that being said he closed the door on his way out.
I stood there, staring at the door as the tears finally streamed down my face. What have I done?