Chapter 9

Jordan’s POV

I let myself into my apartment and locked the door behind me before flopping on the couch and looking around slowly. It only took a few seconds before everything that took place between Oliver and me started to flood my head.

We stopped kissing about a minute after he asked why it felt so right knowing it was wrong. I got extremely hard, and so did Oliver but we didn’t do more than the heated kiss we exchanged right there before the television.

Once the movie, which we barely paid attention to, finished, he showed me to a room where I was going to spend the night. He lent me a shirt since I insisted on taking a shower when in reality, I used that excuse because I wanted to orgasm so badly after getting so riled up by him. The shirt smelled so strongly of him, and I inhaled the scent deeply before falling asleep.

The following day we made breakfast together. I was wearing his shirt and my jeans from the previous night. There was a moment where I couldn’t reach the cupboard holding the salt and seasonings which made me ask for help from Oliver. Oliver being the goof that he was bent and wrapped his arms beneath my ass, lifting me up without any warning. I had reached for the seasonings with shaky hands and my heart pounding, not because I was lifted unexpectedly, but because of the feelings that filled my stomach at that moment.

We didn’t talk about the kiss we shared, but I was a hundred percent sure that he was thinking about it as much as I am.

My phone started ringing and I quickly dug it out of my pocket and answered the call when I saw Derek’s name on the screen.

“Hi baby,” he started to say, and I huffed out a quiet breath.

“I’m really sorry I couldn’t make it yesterday. Something really important came up and I sincerely apologize.”

“And you had to wait a whole day after you bailed on me before calling to apologize?” I asked quietly, blinking my eyes a few times.

“I texted you last night,” he argued, and I breathed out a sigh. He didn’t even sound apologetic.

“That doesn’t count. I was mad at you, so I didn’t even read the text.”

“But I already fucking apologized.”

I didn’t bother replying to his outburst and instead ended the call while he was saying something. The phone rang immediately, which I ignored. He called a few times and finally gave up when I didn’t answer the calls.

I dragged myself to the kitchen and chugged down half a bottle of cold water before heading back to the sitting room and flopping on the couch. I stared at the ring on my third finger and traced my finger over the beautiful piece of jewel, I could clearly remember the night Derek had gone down on a knee and asked for my hand in marriage.

It was a summer night on a beach. We were having an exclusive dinner with the whole expanse rented out for ourselves. I had felt like the luckiest man on earth. I had accepted the ring immediately and we sealed it with a deep kiss.

I wasn’t totally surprised when he proposed to me on the beach since he was already talking about us belonging with ourselves and no one else, which was why it was so heartbreaking to see him sleeping with someone else.

I touched my empty ring finger which was going to have a ring on it in a month time, which made me ask myself the question I’ve been trying to avoid from crossing my mind.

Do I really want to get married?

I allowed my mind drift two weeks backwards before shaking my head slowly, with the conversations and everything that has transpired between Derek and me, I didn’t think I was actually ready for the wedding the way I thought.

Which made me come to the realization that I had only accepted his proposal because I had felt lucky that he wanted to spend the rest of his life with him, and not because I was in love with him and actually wanted to spend the rest of my life with him.

Don’t get me wrong. It’s not like I wasn’t in love with Derek or anything. I don’t think our marriage could be successful with the way our conversation was going. Plus, I still felt like he was seeing the twink I caught him with, even after promising me he wouldn’t anymore.

And let’s not forget how Derek already made me normalize not giving my consent when it comes to sex, I was really mad about that and would bring it up with him whenever we meet, along with the fact that I’d prefer it if we rethink our marriage decisions.

My phone vibrated on my thigh, and I checked it immediately. A small smile appeared on my face when I saw who the text was from. As expected, it was from Oliver who was checking to see if I’ve gotten home safely. It was already something I was already used to receiving from him, these small texts that he’d randomly send every day since the time we got each other’s numbers.

I texted him back immediately and laid on my couch, staring longingly at the television but too lazy to lift up from my current position to turn on the television and get the remote control.

I signed deeply and replied before drifting into a dreamless sleep, right there on the couch with my outfit of since yesterday still on me.

***

I laughed loudly and clicked away on my phone while Oliver laid in the grass with puppies and young dogs crawling over him. We decided to visit a dog shelter since we were both dog enthusiasts. Oliver has handed me his phone and demanded I take pictures of him being goofy with the dogs. I took a few pictures of him grinning Wilde at a white puppy who had its tongue lolling out. A bigger dog came out of nowhere and licked over Oliver’s face, the disgusted expression that covered his face was too good to not be captured which was why I took pictures of it in both phones.

I walked towards him and dropped into the spot beside him, the dogs immediately fascinated by a new appearance all abandoned Oliver and flopped over me, crawling into my thighs and pressing their nose into my neck and arms. I laughed at Oliver who scowled at the dogs whose whole attention were focused on me. I stroked their furs and scattered kisses over their cute furry heads.

“Take some aesthetic pictures of me.” I said to Oliver as I handed him my phone.

“Don’t worry, I’ll just use mine and send them to you after editing them.” He replied as he pushed my phone back into my palm before walking a few inches backwards and crouching on his hind legs.

“Alright, let’s do it!” He called out.

I picked up the smallest dog and lifted it into the air, throwing my hair back and smiling wildly at it, the sun shining directly on my face. I did a few more aesthetic poses and even laid down on the grass with all the dogs surrounding my face while Oliver clicked away.

He finally came forward and flopped down on the grass beside me, his hand moving vigorously against his phone screen.

“The pictures are all awesome, I’ll work on them later tonight.”

“Did you learn anything relating to pictures taking or editing?” I asked.

“Actually, I wanted to be a photographer/cinematographer when I was little, and I was really interested in it back then, I took online classes and practiced how to edit on my laptop after each lesson until I was pretty good for someone who learnt everything without a life practical. But then along the way, dad reminded me that he hoped I still remembered the fact that the photography thing I was yapping on and on about is just a hobby of mine since I was still most definitely going to work officially in an office after college.” He explained, running his hand through his hair at a point and digging out a piece of sunglasses from the tip of his shirt and slipping them on.

“Oh, that’s... cruel.” I stated flatly, not wanting to imagine how I’d have coped assuming my parents to did something like this to me while I was growing up.

“I don’t see it that way anymore. At least I love doing what I do now so I’m over it.”

We stayed silent for a few minutes, soaking up the sun and running our fingers through the furry animals over our thighs until Oliver tapped my shoulder, I turned towards him and tilted my head.

“You looked so beautiful back there while I was taking those pictures, your smile was literally lighting up the whole place.”

I smiled and hit his shoulders before turning back around and burning my face into one of the dog’s fur to hide the smile on my face.

“The word ‘beautiful’ is not enough to explain how beautiful you look.” He continued and I tilted my head towards him with a smile, he nodded his head at me, his smile mirroring mine.

“I honestly wished I met you way earlier.” He whispered and my smile disappeared as well while my face lowered if that wasn’t the exact same thing on my mind while I was taking pictures of him.

“I wish I met you first before... y’know.” I stated and he nodded his head immediately before turning away from me to stare straight into the expanse of grass. He tugged his sunglasses off and ran his fingers through his hair without saying anything else. I turned back around and stared straight ahead as well, wondering why my heart was hurting so bad at the thought of marrying Derek and leaving Oliver. It wasn’t like I had him yet or anything.

But I was already in love with him.