Chapter 54 His apology
Isabella POV
It’s like there’s two different versions of us. I despise everything about you, but we have this…I don’t even know what it is.”
“Passion, lust, connection, affection and respect for each other”
“Yeah, I guess.”
He pressed his forehead to mine. “I understand that all too well.”
“I don’t know what to do…” I closed my eyes and held on to him, seeking comfort from my tormentor. He could take me to bed right this second, and I wouldn’t fight him. I’d spread my legs and pull him deeper into me. I’d want more than what he could give. “Please leave my family alone. Just drop it, okay?”
He stood in silence, his hands still on my waist, I opened my eyes and looked at him. “Please.”
“You know I can’t do that…”
“I could have killed you, but I didn’t. You owe me.”
He stared at me with his blue eyes, his expression unreadable. “Dante, hurting my family isn’t going to bring yours back. It’s not going to rewrite history. You’ll just make your life feel more hollow. And you’ll only hurt me… I know you don’t want to hurt me.”
“I do want to hurt you, Isabella,” he whispered. “My intentions toward you have never changed. You still hate me, I still hate you.”
“But we both feel something else besides hate toward each other…”
He didn’t deny it. “Yes. But we’re still on opposite sides of the battlefield. Your family not only destroyed mine but ruined minheritance. If my mother had what she needed, she wouldn’t have been a whore. And I’m sure being a prostitute was just as painful as her eventual death.”
“My family was just trying to protect themselves, don't you see. Surely, you must see it as a retaliation, not a provocation. Your father killed my aunt and raped my mother. You think those crimes don’t deserve to be punished?”
He held my gaze, his expression unreadable. “I won’t say what he did was right. But your family’s actions ruined my life. My mother was innocent. I was innocent. You got to grow up in a family who adored you in a beautiful mansion. You had everything I never did. I will always hate you for that, for having the life that should have been mine.”
Tears welled up in my eyes. “I’m sorry that happened to you. I am. What if my family gave you money”
“I don’t want their money. I want my money.” He pulled his hands from my hips, his anger starting to flood in his veins. “You don’t get it. I’m starting to think you’ll never get it.”
We were back to where we started, and it made me wonder if we’d grown at all. He held a knife to my throat but didn’t kill me. I held a gun to his head but didn’t pull the trigger. It seemed like so much had changed, but it never really did. “That painting…did you want me to make it so you could remember me?
Because you’re going to kill me?”
He held my gaze, his expression as hard as ice. He said he would never lie to me, that he would always give me his honesty. So whatever answer he gave next was the truth. “Yes.”
I took a deep breath, feeling the regret circulate through my heart. “Why didn’t I kill you?” I should have pulled the trigger. I should have ended his life last night. He suddenly walked away, leaving me sitting on the kitchen counter to deal with my feelings. I didn’t shoot him because it felt wrong, but now I wished I had. My life was on the line. He intended to kill me, and even though I didn’t put a bullet in his
brain, that didn’t mean he would be so kind toward me. He walked back inside with the gun pointed to the ground. He handed it to
me. I didn’t take it, unsure what was happening. He snapped out the barrel and showed me the magazine. There were no bullets. He closed it again and set it on the counter. “When you came home after
Christmas, I found it and removed the bullets.”
I closed my eyes and felt the shame hit me hard. This entire time I thought I’d outsmarted him, but now I knew I never had a chance. He didn’t flinch when the barrel was pressed to his temple because he knew there was no
ammunition. He was testing me, seeing if I had the courage to actually pull the trigger and now he knew I didn’t. Tears formed under my eyelids and streaked down my cheeks. I didn’t care that I gave in to my weakness, even in front of him. I felt stupid thinking I outsmarted this man when he outsmarted me a long time ago. I was doomed, trapped in this cage without walls. That was how powerful this man was. He could keep me there without chains or locks.
He cupped my cheeks and wiped my tears away with the pads of his thumbs. I opened my eyes and saw him stare at me, his eyes softer than they were before. He kissed the corner of my mouth then ran his fingers through my hair. “I don’t say this very often, but when I do, I mean it.” He pressed his
forehead to mine. “I’m sorry. I really am.”