Lukas and I both climb into the back seat. He claims it’s because there’s more space back here, but by now, I know him better than that. It’s obvious he just wants to keep snooping around in my head, and it’s way harder for him to do that if one of us is in the front seat.
“Finally, family time is always exhausting. Although, I have to admit, it wasn’t as bad for me as usual. You were taking all the heat this time. All Mum wanted to talk about was your new boyfriend.” Julian says as he starts the car. He glances at me in the rearview mirror, smirking.
“Glad I could be of service.” I answer dryly, leaning back against the seat.
“I’m just saying, it’s a good thing this was lunch and not dinner. If you’d stayed any longer, Mum would already be planning your wedding. Probably in the backyard with pink and white floral arrangements and a three tier cake.” Julian continues, still looking way too amused. I groan and cover my face with my hands.
“It’s a good thing I’m not planning on attending any more family events. This was a one off thing, and I’m done. Officially done.” I say firmly, narrowing my eyes at my brother.
“Also, I can’t believe they all believed we’re a couple. Even Aunt Daisy, and she knows we only showed up to look into her. How is that even possible?” I add, dropping my hands and turning to Lukas. He frowns slightly, tilting his head like he’s trying to figure out if I’m joking. Then he reaches out and grabs my hand, apparently needing further insight into my brain.
“What’s so unbelievable about it? We have a lot in common. Why wouldn’t they think we’re a couple?” He asks. I raise an eyebrow, turning fully to face him, I pull my hand free and cross my arms over my chest. If I were standing, I’d probably be planting my hands on my hips.
“We have absolutely nothing in common.” I say bluntly.
“Of course we do.” Lukas responds smoothly, his tone maddeningly calm.
“Like what?” I demand.
“You spend ridiculous amounts of money on clothes just to wear boring colours. You’re a dog person, and I’m a cat person. You’re rude to basically everyone while I try to be friendly. And-” I’m interrupted by Lukas.
“So, we both have an appreciation for our own styles and clothing, we’re both animal people, and clearly, I could benefit from having a sassy woman with pink hair around to kick my ass when I forget my manners.” He reasons, a smirk on his face. My jaw drops. I open my mouth to argue, but nothing comes out.
“But… That’s not… I mean…” I trail off, completely speechless for once.
Julian bursts out laughing, practically doubling over in his seat. Or as much as he can while driving a car. He glances back at us through the mirror, his grin stretching from ear to ear.
“You know, he has a point, Clare.” He says gleefully, clearly enjoying my indignation. I narrow my eyes at Julian, the temptation to punch him rising rapidly. Unfortunately, hitting the driver of the car I’m currently in seems like a bad idea.
“Are siblings supposed to be this irritating?” I mutter under my breath.
“According to everything I’ve ever seen on TV. Yes, definitely.” Julian answers. Lukas just raises an eyebrow at me, he is looking far too pleased with himself. And that’s when it hits me, he’s a lawyer. He’s used to making arguments, to twisting things to his advantage. Of course, he’s been working on this whole ‘we’re a convincing couple’ narrative in his head this entire time, or at least since I started saying no one would believe it.
“Damn you.” I grumble, sinking back into the seat.
“I’m just saying, if even Aunt Daisy bought it, then clearly, we’re more convincing than you give us credit for.” Lukas says with a shrug, his smirk firmly in place. Julian snickers again.
“Honestly, Clare, it’s kind of impressive. I mean, if I didn’t know better, even I might’ve believed it. I only realised because I spent half my life in the room next door to you. I had to notice at least a FEW things about you.” He comments teasingly.
“You’re both insufferable.” I mutter, but I can feel my lips twitching like they’re trying to form a reluctant smile. This whole day has been a disaster, but at least I’m not dealing with it alone. Even if Lukas is a smug, infuriating know it all, and my brother is an unexpected pain in the ass, they’re still my allies in all this chaos. For now, that’s enough.
“Oh hey, mind if we make a stop?” Lukas asks suddenly, breaking the comfortable silence in the car.
“Sure, where at?” Julian responds cheerfully, clearly still in his good natured sibling mode.
“Somewhere I can get ice cream. And alcohol.” Lukas says with a smirk, his tone far too casual for my liking. I groan, sinking lower in my seat.
“Traitor,” I mutter under my breath. Julian raises an eyebrow but still seems upbeat.
“Sudden craving for sugar?” he asks, glancing at Lukas through the rearview mirror, but he obviously doesn’t believe that. Lukas shakes his head, clearly enjoying himself.
“Nope. Your sister spent most of the last hour mentally outlining in excruciating detail how much she was going to need alcohol after dealing with your family for the afternoon. I value my life, so I’m making sure she gets it.” He answers. Julian bursts out laughing while I jab my elbow into Lukas’s ribs.
“Way to throw me under the bus.” I grumble, but even I can’t hide my slight smile.
“Hey, I’m just being proactive.” Lukas replies with an exaggerated wince, rubbing his side where I hit him.
“I can get behind this plan. Sign me up.” Julian says, his tone so enthusiastic that I pause, caught off guard.
“Wait, for real?” I ask, tilting my head at him. Julian shrugs casually but then sighs.
“Nah, as much as it sounds like a great time, I’ve got dinner plans with my girlfriend in a couple of hours. I need to be able to drive. And a sugar binge would totally ruin my appetite.” He answers. That was just way too responsible an answer.
“Wait, hold on.” I sit up straighter.
“You have a girlfriend? Does Mum know?” I demand. Surely if mum knew that he was seeing someone she would have mentioned it at LEAST once. Julian’s laughter stops abruptly, and his expression shifts to one of mock seriousness.
“No, and you better not tell her. I actually LIKE this girl. I’d like to keep her around for a little while before Mum and Aunt Daisy inevitably scare her off. Also…” He hesitates, glancing at me like he’s weighing whether to share the next part.
“She’s not a witch. She’s an elf. So we can pretty much guarantee they wouldn’t approve. She wouldn’t get the warm welcome your ‘boyfriend’ received.” He says with a frustrated sigh.
“An elf?!” I repeat, my voice incredulous. It’s not that it’s impossible, there are elves in the city, but they’re definitely not common. Most of them prefer smaller, quieter places far away from the chaos of urban life.
“Where in the world did you meet an elf?” I demand. Julian’s lips twitch into a sly grin.
“I’ll make you a deal.” He says, glancing between Lukas and me.
“You explain what’s going on with you and Aunt Daisy, and I’ll tell you all about how I met Ali.” He offers.
“Deal.” I reply without hesitation.
“But just so you know, I’m still getting ice cream, even if you’re too responsible to join in on the sugar binge.” I say firmly. Julian chuckles, his mood light.
“Fair enough. But hey Lukas, if you’re getting the ice cream, don’t cheap out. If this is her coping mechanism, go all out.” He encourages. Well, at least he gets how exhausting our parents are. How did I not know this about him sooner? He never seemed to mind them. Lukas smirks at me.
“See? Even your brother supports this plan. Don’t say I’m not a good fake boyfriend.” He teases. I roll my eyes.
“Just drive, Julian. The sooner I get my ice cream, the less likely I am to punch either of you.” I grumble. Lukas laughs and I groan, dropping my head back against the seat. I barely got along with my brother before today, it seems unfair that he and Lukas are so friendly. Lukas doesn’t even LIKE people all that much. Still… It’s kind of nice. I never thought I would ENJOY spending time with a family member other than Laura.