31- What's That Phrase About Absence?

31- What's That Phrase About Absence?
"At this point, I'm concerned you're just trying to get under my skin..." Imset sighed, looking Aisha's outfit over once more as they headed into a glass-enclosed skyscraper. The short pencil skirt and tapered button-up could have been fine if it weren't for the lacy thigh highs and thick heels. Not to mention Aisha left the top of the shirt unbuttoned enough to show off her Ankh necklace.

"You told me to look like your personal assistant," Aisha rolled her eyes, "I think I understood the assignment perfectly. And look at you," She motioned to his clean, tailored black suit, the cut of which accentuated his complexion and build. "I mean, I'm not saying I don't like it, but remind me again why you have to dress like a human?"

Imset smiled tightly, walking her through the empty lobby and to the elevators along the back corridor as if he had been there a hundred times. Aisha looked around to take in the area. Judging by the wall of mailboxes and the small entryway desk, she assumed this was an apartment building rather than an office building. But given the quality of the finishes and the city location, she was sure it was an upscale one. What city were they in? She supposed it could have been anywhere. It didn’t really matter.

"I forget you don't really know what I do," Imset said, holding the elevator open for her. It was yet another reason he never took anyone with him, "My grandfather, Osiris, is the ruler of the dead, as I'm sure you know that much."

Aisha nodded, tucking in beside him.

"So he works with Ma'at closely, trying his best to ensure a balance between life and death." Imset leaned against the mirrored elevator wall, crossing his arms as the doors closed. "If he notices a significant imbalance, he alerts one of us, depending on the issue."

"An imbalance? Like dead people who shouldn't be dead?"

Imset waved his hand, "Exactly. An influx of people who would otherwise be alive if not for an outside human influence. For example, we are here to meet with a man who has likely led to the death of several hundred women in the last year."

Aisha's sharp intake of air told Imset that had hit her still-sensitive heart. Aiko had been hurt. He still wasn’t sure if he should talk to Anubis and find out once and for all if the woman lived. It might be too much for Aisha to handle. She was strong, so strong but there was a limit. He forced himself to remember what they were talking about.

"Human trafficking," Imset answered the unasked question, "The reason I put on a persona for this is simple. Torture is effective. But I am also here to send a message at this event, to scare the others who have ambition, or an intention to do the same. Over the years, I've found that appearing benign beforehand, amplifies the fear. When pain and panic are not expected, it makes people more careful. Always trying to avoid it again."

“Making people do the right thing because they don’t know when or if you’ll return?”

“Exactly. And no one outside of the people who have seen me firsthand, would ever believe it. It keeps the effect small, concentrated to those who are the biggest risk of fucking up the balance.”

"How do you know this guy is having an event? And how do you know your way around the building?"

Imset flashed his eyes red for a moment, "We don't have the time it would take to explain everything a god can do, Aisha. You'll just have to trust that I know. And that the plan is fitting."

"That's--" The ding of the elevator doors opening cut Aisha off as they exited into the hallway of the top floor.

"Smart?" Imset answered. Swaggering them toward a set of ornate double doors.

"I was going to say diabolical," Aisha shivered. She didn't feel bad for human traffickers or anyone that awful but she'd be lying if she didn't say his plan to instill fear didn't make her uneasy. But anyone who had led to the deaths of that many women...

A pair of guards stood on either side of the double doors, hands precariously placed near their hips. Aisha tensed as Imset wrapped a casual hand around her waist.

"State your business," one said, stepping forward. Imset merely looked at him, a bored expression on his face. Aisha started to speak but stilled as both guards went slack, falling to the ground. She gasped.

"They're alive," he murmured, pushing the door open for her to follow, "Just not worth the effort it would take to make this believable." Aisha took a shaky breath. She knew Imset's moral compass was flawed. He didn't view collateral damage in the same light.

Inside, Aisha noticed a party in full swing. Large wall-to-wall windows in the living room showed off a nighttime city skyline. Powerful men and gorgeous women were spread around the room in various conversations. This kind of money... and influence.... all bought by human trafficking. Imset let the door close and tugged her along, through the oblivious crowd.

"A drink?" he asked over his shoulder. "You might need it."

A moment later he passed her a glass of champagne and pulled her to stand near the window. They watched from the sidelines as everyone made small talk. Aisha found herself trying to understand how seemingly normal people could be involved in such a heinous business. Maybe the wives and girlfriends didn’t know where all the money came from. But they knew something--or at least they had to suspect it wasn’t legal money, right? Did that make them guilty too? What went into the measure of a soul? She thought again of Ma'at and her feather. Would Aisha's soul be found wanting?

Imset straightened himself from the wall and Aisha made a move to follow him.

"Don't move. Distractions make this more difficult. I agreed to bring you along, not allow you to participate," he admitted, unbuttoning his suit jacket in a fluid motion. Moving to peck her cheek, Imset brushed a thumb against her arm and pulled away.

"CLINTON ANDERS!" Imset bellowed, moving to the center of the party as all eyes fell on him, "The hour of your judgment has arrived. Come peacefully and I'll take that into consideration."

Aisha heard the clicking of guns being unholstered around the room--saw the angry eyes of the man who appeared to be Clinton. Imset's smile grew into a vicious delight, "Or don't. I much prefer it if you don't..."
_________________________________________________
Aisha leaned against the shower wall, trying to dissect her feelings. After Imset took her to work with him, he'd dropped her back at her apartment while he went to give his grandfather an update. She hadn't seen or heard from the god or his family ever since. And that had been five days ago.

Nothing seemed amiss on Tuesday itself. Going to class and then work with him had exhausted her so after a shower she did her homework and slept. As much as she missed him, Aisha didn't want to come off too clingy so she brushed her feelings aside. He was a god and he had responsibilities. She had to understand that and be reasonable. She couldn't expect him to make her the center of his world.

On Wednesday she went to her classes, tried her best to ignore Zach and Evan while she figured out exactly how she’d exact her punishment, and then took a late shift at the casino, all the while thinking Imset would pop up. But he didn't. She even tried calling his name before she went to bed, but only the silence of her apartment had answered.

By Thursday she was starting to worry. She called his siblings, as embarrassing as it was, and waited for an answer that never came. Had she done something wrong? Watching Imset work had been as terrifying as it was informative. The amount of blood that god could cover himself in was astounding. What she'd seen when he punished Josh was nothing compared to the kinds of creative endings he could deal to people. If it all hadn't been so gruesome, it might have been artistic.

But she wondered if she had done something to upset him. Aisha tried to think of anything she could have said or done to bother the god. She came up empty every time. Imset had taken her to three different jobs. After the first one he’d spent at least an hour asking if she was alright. And oddly enough she’d been fine. The next two he’d stopped asking but she often caught him giving her a look she couldn’t read. But it had been a heavy enough look to make her blood heat.

He made an example of someone at each job and afterward, he'd taken them back to his room for a little alone time and to change their clothes. As diabolical as it was, Aisha saw firsthand that appearing unassuming had indeed created more fear and uncertainty than if he had shown up as himself in full regalia. And they always left before Anubis showed up to take the soul to the underworld. Aisha suspected it was because there was still tension related to what happened at the bar. 

There had been so much screaming. So much carnage. And yet she hadn't batted an eyelash, hadn't gasped or screamed. Instead she felt calm, more centered in herself than she ever had before. What did that say about her? She thought he might be happy that she handled it all so well, but then Imset hadn't come back to get her. 

Nothing bad had happened between them but he'd just disappeared from her life as if he'd never been there. It made her insecurities roar back to life.

Aisha rinsed her hair under the spray and began to wash her body. Maybe he had changed his mind about her... She tried to ignore the nagging voice deep down that said it made sense--that she wasn't worthy. That she was only destined for pain and loneliness.

After class on Friday, she had gone to pick out offerings for all the gods just to clear her head. Just to convince herself that she hadn't gone crazy and imagined everything. So that when they finally came back, she would be ready to honor them properly. She'd cried in the shower that night wondering if she was losing her mind. Everything had happened so fast. In the span of a week, she'd gone from a life alone to one filled with gods, back to being alone. There had to be some kind of grand design in that. A torturous, heartbreaking design.

Saturday had been depressing as hell, just work and boredom and wishing someone would show up. She even thought about calling in their contract, asking Imset to punish someone in hopes of seeing him. As twisted as it was, that had to bring him back right? But she didn't call him for vengeance. Not only did she not have a clear idea of what she wanted to do, but she was worried that her heart might break if he didn't show again.

And now here she was, dragging herself through the first half of Sunday trying to pretend she wasn't falling apart at the seams.

Aisha blew out a quiet breath, dunking her head under the water to wash her face. Suddenly she felt hands wrap around her waist and she jumped nearly out of her skin. Aisha coughed and swiped at the water in her face, pushing away from whoever's body was pressed to her own. She couldn't form any words when she opened her eyes to see the shirtless god standing in front of her. Barefoot in a soaking apron doused in shower water, Imset looked unreal. She almost didn't believe her eyes. If he hadn't touched her, she might not have thought he was real.

"Gods, I missed you," Imset's deep tenor squeezed her heart, sent heat and joy and shock through her. His eyes were such a smoldering hazel--his expression somewhere torn between pain and relief. It was a mirror to how Aisha felt herself, so ecstatic to see him, so upset that he'd been away that long without any warning. Aisha gave half a sob as she crushed herself against him. When had she become so emotionally invested in whatever this was? How was she going to survive if it didn’t last? It wasn’t like she’d just be able to forget being with a god.

"WHERE THE HELL HAVE YOU--" he cut her off with his mouth, hot and waiting. So soft but with a hard edge, like he was in a hurry. She moaned, forgetting everything she'd been about to say. It could wait. They would talk and she would figure out what the hell was going on but first, she could enjoy having him back. She could enjoy the fact that he hadn't changed his mind. So many emotions burned through her. Relief. Fear. Anger. Happiness. Lust. Hope.

It was too much for Aisha. She couldn't make sense of what she was supposed to do with all that emotion. Imset deepened the kiss, pulling her roughly against him as his hands toured every inch of her. And just like every time she was in his presence, her body felt like it was reacting on its own. She needed him. Imset spun her around, cutting off anything she might have said and pressing her against the shower tile.

"Unbearable... agony..." he murmured against her, kissing along her shoulder, fitting his large hand between her legs, "An hour... a day... a year. It all feels like the same torture." He pressed against her, rubbing slickness between his fingers. Then he hesitated as if he wasn't sure how far to go or how far she would allow him to go. Something about that warmed Aisha's heart, reminded her of his promise not to do anything to hurt her, reminded her of his declaration that she was his. Forever. And though the days without him were unexpected and painful, maybe that hadn't been his intention? Maybe it hadn't even been his choice if his words were to be believed?

"I thought you weren't coming back" she whispered, her voice breaking a little as she aligned her hand over his in encouragement. A moment later, he pushed in, rolling a calloused finger around her clit as they fought for the joining they both desperately needed. Did he need to resolidify their connection as badly as she did? Was he struggling with his own head full of thoughts? Uncertainty? Fear?

"Who do you belong to?" he grunted, the guttural grate of his voice making her walls clench. Since when was he so possessive? His voice was different, possessively dark and otherworldly. She felt the sound ghost over her skin. Should it have alarmed her a little? Maybe. But she couldn't think straight with him moving against every part of her--couldn't deny how powerful it felt to be desired so strongly by a living god. Wanting him to need her as much as she was beginning to feel like she needed him.

She gasped as he pressed her harder into the tile, almost impatient with his stroke, then she answered, "You."

"Who?" he moved his empty hand over her breast, pulling her back from the wall enough to clamp down.

"You, ah..." she was a mess, too many emotions and sensations building in her, shaking her to the core. Aisha lost herself completely, begging for release. Begging to never feel abandoned again. To never feel vulnerable or worthless.

"Who--" he slammed all the way in with a hiss, "Do you belong to? Say. It."

"Y-you I-mmmm-set," she gasped, her body leaking around him so thoroughly they both were lost to its slickness. He pulled his hands away from her, throwing one into the wall and clamping the other on her ass, arching her. Gushing out of control, Aisha latched onto that arm for dear life.

He growled unintelligible things to her back, gulping in shaky breaths as their mouths found each other again. Climax ripped through them both so suddenly they were soundless--just straining and holding their air.

As soon as he pulled out, she collapsed into him like a rag doll.

"Never--" he panted-- "Never." Smoothing her hair down he pulled her back into the water, caressing her gently as the water washed away what they had done. Never what? She wondered. She put that mystery on the back burner because now that the lust had passed, she was ready to rip his head off.

"Where the hell have you been?" Aisha asked when she finally found her voice again. He tensed, and she turned to face him, watching a cloud of emotion darken his eyes.

"I was kept from returning. Made to be busy. Until today," he spat the words out, running a thumb along her cheek, her bottom lip.

He cut the water off and scooped her into his arms.

"Is that all you're going to say?!" she felt her hysteria growing, heard the edge of panic in her own voice. "I called you for days! What does being ‘made to be busy’ even mean?"

Imset clenched his jaw, his eyes tightening as he wrapped her in a towel and carried her to her bed. She didn't resist him, no matter her anger.

"I know. I could hear them. But I--" Imset seemed to lose his point, growing quiet and stoic as he dried her skin carefully.

"But what? You changed your mind about this? You got tired of me? You didn't want to waste your time?"

Aisha felt the tears building with every thought. All those insecurities like knives in her gut. Imset grabbed her face, "Never. Never think that. It's complicated and... I really can't say anything else about it. I would, I swear I would if I could, Aisha. I never want to hurt you. But I didn't have control over this. I couldn't--"

Aisha watched his face as he broke off his sentence. How hard was it for a god like him to admit he had no control? She could see the desperation in his eyes, pleading for her to believe him. And did she? Aisha couldn't think of a single good reason for him to lie. He was a god. He could simply say and do as he wished and she had no control over that. There was no reason to pretend otherwise. Aisha pushed her feelings away. Emotions were complicated. Sex was simple

So she shifted her legs open, "Prove to me how much you missed me then."

Imset grinned at the husk of her voice. "I would… truly... but we have somewhere to be. I know I'm asking a lot of you. Too much. Especially since I can't offer you a real explanation. But..."

"Where do we have to go?" Aisha sat up, closing her legs in irritation. The emotions she had been trying to suppress, bubbling back up.

"Tonight we have to have dinner with my family...All of them."

"When?" Aisha's color drained. She wasn’t ready to be near elder gods. His parents? His grandparents? She might faint. But at least it meant he was serious about her right?

Imset looked down, hiding from her expression, "Unfortunately, they're expecting us right now."