Chapter 89 The Loneliness
Iva’s P.O.V.
When I finally drag myself back to our bedroom, the sheets are tossed aside and the room is silent. The wardrobe door is slightly open. His watch is gone from the nightstand.
He already left.
No note. No "I’m sorry." Just a faint trace of his cologne lingers in the air and a dead silence.
Will, why are you doing this? It’s killing me.
I force myself to move. Shower. Dress. Fix my makeup enough to hide the swelling around my eyes. I don’t recognise the woman staring back at me in the mirror.
She looks fragile. Broken.
I hate that.
I leave for college because routine feels safer than staying in that house that no longer feels like home.
I give my lectures there, but my mind is miles away, replaying the moment he pushed me. I skip lunch. I can’t eat. The thought of food makes my stomach turn.
After my last class, I don’t go to the parking lot. Because I don't want to go home. Home is where the silence is loudest. Home is where the man I love treats me like a ghost.
I sit on one of the benches near the faculty garden, staring at nothing.
Students pass by, laughing, talking about assignments and weekend plans. Life goes on for everyone else.
But mine feels like it paused somewhere two weeks ago.
I don’t understand what happened to my perfect life.
I had everything. Love. Happiness. Peace.
Now I have questions.
And silence.
The worst part is, I have no one to talk to.
My world revolves around Will. He is my husband, my best friend, my safe place, and my master. I never needed anyone else because I had him.
And now the one person I would run to… is the one I’m hurting because of. The loneliness feels suffocating. I lower my face into my hands, trying to hold myself together.
“Iva? Hey… is everything alright?” As I hear a voice, I blink and look up.
Daniel.
One of the lecturers from the economics department. We’ve met a few times at faculty events. Polite conversations. Nothing more.
“Yes…” I try to pull myself together, smoothing my hair. "I’m fine, Daniel. Just... a long day."
"You don't look fine. You look like you're carrying the weight of the world."
I look away.
“You can tell me, Iva,” he says gently, sitting down beside me. “Sometimes it helps to say it out loud.”
The dam breaks. Maybe it’s the exhaustion, or the fact that he’s a stranger and it feels safer to break in front of someone who doesn't know my perfect life.
"It's my husband.” The tears roll down my cheeks. "He’s been acting so weird lately. He’s ignoring me, shutting me out... and it hurts so much." I cover my face with my hands, sobbing into my palms. "I’ve asked him a thousand times what’s wrong, and he just says he’s busy. But he’s never been too busy for me. He’s hiding something, Daniel. I know he is."
“Iva, relax.” Daniel quickly reaches into his bag and hands me a bottle of water. “Have some water first.”
My hands shake as I take it. I sip, trying to steady my breathing. “Daniel,” I say brokenly, “I love him so much. And I know he loves me too. I know he does. But I don’t understand why he’s doing this to me. He pushed me away last night. Literally. He wouldn't even look at me.”
“He pushed me away last night. Literally,” I whisper, staring at the ground. “He wouldn’t even look at me.”
He sets the water bottle down between us and takes a slow breath. “Iva, listen to me carefully.”
I lift my eyes to his.
His voice is firm as he continues, “If you keep chasing him while he’s pushing you away, he’s never going to see what he’s doing to you. Right now, he thinks you’ll always be there. Waiting and crying for him. You should stop running after him and leave him.”
Leave him? My heart pounds painfully with the mere thought of leaving him. I can’t even imagine it.
I wipe my cheeks with the back of my hand. "But I love him. I can’t just... leave. He’s my husband. He’s my life."
“That’s exactly why you have to,” Daniel insists, leaning slightly closer. “If he truly loves you the way you say he does, the silence of an empty house will force him to face whatever he’s hiding.”
My chest tightens.
“He won’t value your presence until he actually feels your absence,” Daniel continues. “You’re suffocating in that house, Iva. And it’s killing your spirit.”
I look away, hugging myself.
“No.” I shake my head. “I can’t. Where would I even go? I have no one else.”
The admission makes me feel smaller than ever. My entire existence is built around the life Will and I created.
“I have a penthouse. You can stay there. Alone. Peacefully. Until you decide what you want to do.” As he suggests, I get panic.
“What? No. I can’t accept that,” I say immediately, shaking my head. “I barely know you. I can’t just move into your property.”
“Iva, look at yourself.”
No, I don’t want to.
He continues, “You’re a ghost of who you were. If you go back there tonight, you’re just going to sit in that bedroom and wait for him. You don't have another option if you want to keep your sanity.”
The image flashes in my mind.
The shove.
The silence.
The way he didn’t call my name. The way he didn’t care about me after hurting me.
I look down at my trembling hands.
The thought of going back to that place makes my chest feel heavy. The silence. The waiting. The hoping.
But leaving?
Leaving feels like betrayal.
I love him. I love him more than my own pride.
But staying is breaking me.
I think of Will’s cold eyes last night.
The irritation.
The indifference.
And for the first time, the pain of staying begins to outweigh the fear of leaving.
I inhale shakily and accept his offer. “Okay. I’ll go. Just for a few days.”
The words feel unreal as they leave my mouth. As if I’m watching someone else say them.