Chapter 144 The Sins We Carry

Chapter 144 The Sins We Carry
[Lana]

We dove into the cool water simultaneously, creating twin splashes. The lake enveloped us, refreshing and private. Under the surface, I created a small whirlpool with my magic, pulling Cedric closer to me.

When we emerged, breathless and laughing, I found myself in his arms. The playful splashing ignited something deeper, fiercer. My Heat surged, a primal force I couldn’t—and didn’t want to—control. My lips crashed against his, hungry and demanding. The cool water did nothing to temper the fire building within me.

Cedric responded with equal intensity, his hands gripping my waist as if to anchor us against the storm of desire. "You're so damn beautiful like this," he murmured against my mouth, his voice rough with need.

I smirked, biting his lower lip just hard enough to draw a gasp. "And you're cute when you're desperate."

The world narrowed to the heat of our bodies, the taste of lake water on his skin, the urgent rhythm of our movements. My nails dug into his shoulders, drawing a low growl from him that only fueled my need.

We moved together with a ferocity that matched my inner chaos, the water rippling violently around us with each desperate thrust. I could feel the lake seeping into me, cool tendrils mixing with the heat of my skin, as if the water itself was becoming part of our frenzied connection.

My Heat drove me, wild and unyielding, every sensation heightened to a razor’s edge. His strength matched mine, a clash of raw power and need, until the tension shattered in a wave of raw, untamed release.

Afterward, we dragged ourselves to the shore, collapsing on the grassy bank, chests heaving. I conjured two thick towels from thin air, tossing one to Cedric. As we dried ourselves, I sat on a flat rock by the water's edge and pointed to an ancient oak tree on the opposite shore.

"My father Emerson used to climb that tree when he was young and jump into the lake," I said, wringing water from my hair. "Gabriel, being more vampire than anything else, had to stay inside and watch from the house until sunset."

Cedric settled beside me, our shoulders touching as he toweled his hair. "What about you? What did you like to do here?"

"Me?" I laughed softly, a rare genuine smile crossing my face. "I remember when I was very small, maybe four or five, both my fathers would bring me here on summer evenings. Emerson would hold me in the water while Gabriel taught me to swim. They were so patient, even when I splashed and made a mess. Mother would sit on this very rock, watching us and laughing. Gabriel would always pretend to drown dramatically when I splashed him, making me giggle until my sides hurt."

I trailed off, surprised by the warmth of the memory. "Later, when I was older, I would jump from the tree and create whirlpools underwater to scare Gabriel."

As I spoke of family memories, I noticed a flicker of longing cross Cedric's face, a shadow of something deep and painful. Through our bond, I felt a hollow ache that wasn't mine.

The stillness of the lake seemed to encourage confession. Cedric stared at the water, his voice quiet when he finally spoke.

"I envy you," he said. "Having these memories. Having brothers, parents..."

I turned to face him. "Surely not all your memories are painful? There must have been some good moments?"

Cedric remained silent for a long moment. When he spoke again, his voice was strained with the effort of unearthing something deeply buried.

"Raymond... my foster father..." he began, then stopped, swallowing hard. "He was molesting Maya, my sister."

The words hung in the air between us, heavy with implication. I said nothing, allowing him space to continue.

"I found out the night I killed him," Cedric said, his jaw clenched. "I heard Maya crying. When I went to her room, she told me everything. What he'd been doing to her for months."

Through our bond, I felt the ghost of his rage—fourteen years old, discovering his sister's abuse, helpless to change what had already happened.

"I was only fourteen, but something inside me... awakened. Something I couldn't control."

He described setting the fire deliberately, ensuring Raymond couldn't escape while making sure the neighbors were safe.

"I don't regret it," Cedric said, meeting my eyes directly. "If I could go back, I'd make the same choice again."

As his confession ended, I felt a subtle shift in his demeanor—as though a weight had been lifted. The bond between us hummed with a new clarity.

I reached out, my fingers lightly touching his temple. I could feel the pain of his memories, sharp-edged and poisonous.

"I could take this memory away," I offered softly. "Make it so you're not haunted by these images anymore."

I explained the soul magic I'd learned from my mother, how it could selectively remove specific memories. My voice contained a gentleness I rarely allowed myself to show.

Cedric carefully moved my hand away from his face but kept hold of it. "I don't want to forget," he said firmly. "These experiences made me who I am. Forgetting would be denying part of myself."

He explained how his memories, however painful, were integral to his identity and his ability to protect others. I felt an unexpected respect bloom within me, so different from my usual contempt for humans.

The sun began to sink lower in the sky, and we decided to return to the mansion. Our walk back was quiet, but the silence felt comfortable rather than tense. Occasionally, I caught glimpses of Cedric's emotions through our bond—his fear of me had diminished, replaced by something more complex.

I found myself contemplating this strange new intimacy, both terrified and intrigued by its unfamiliarity.

When we arrived back at the house, everyone had scattered to their own activities. Gabriel intercepted us in the entrance hall, his expression unusually serious.

"We need to talk," he said, his tone leaving no room for argument.

I sensed the gravity in his emotions, immediately putting me on alert. Cedric was drawn away by Raven, who wanted to show him his magic collection, leaving Gabriel and me alone.

Gabriel led me to my father's study, locking the door behind us and setting up a soundproofing spell. The ancient magical books and family photographs around us reminded me of the time before my exile.

He sat behind the desk, fingers interlaced, eyes fixed on mine. "I know something about Cedric that you need to know."

Dark energy began to curl around my fingertips instinctively as a sense of foreboding washed over me.

"Fifteen years ago, a wolf pack tried to stop your killing spree in Northridge," Gabriel began, his voice calm but heavy. "Emerson and I received word and rushed to stop you, but everything happened too quickly. We were too late."

Gabriel described arriving at a scene of devastation—an entire wolf pack nearly annihilated.

"Among the ruins, we found two infants in swaddling clothes who had somehow survived," he continued. "We placed them at the doorstep of a human welfare agency, hoping they would grow up far from the supernatural world and its dangers."

He pulled out an ancient record book, opening it to a page documenting the incident. My blood froze as I saw the name "Blackwood Pack" written in faded ink.

"That's Cedric's last name," I whispered, the horrifying realization dawning on me.

"Yes," Gabriel confirmed. "Those twins were Cedric and his sister."

My mind reeled with the implications. I had almost exterminated Cedric's entire family. I was the reason he grew up an orphan.

"He deserves to know the truth," Gabriel insisted. "He's your mate. You nearly killed his entire family."

He explained that hiding this fact from Cedric was unfair and would destroy any chance of genuine trust between us.

"If you don't tell him, I will," Gabriel said firmly. "He might leave you forever, but at least it will be a choice based on truth."

Fear unlike anything I'd ever known gripped me. The dark energy around me surged violently, causing items on the desk to tremble. A lamp shattered.

"Morality?" I laughed coldly. "Are you joking? Do you think I care about something as trivial as morality? I've killed thousands without a second thought."

Gabriel leaned forward, his eyes never leaving mine. "No, you don't care about morality. But you do care about him. You care about what you've found with Cedric—something real after centuries of emptiness."

His words struck deeper than any weapon could have. The darkness around me flickered, betraying my uncertainty.

"Give me time," I finally said, my voice barely audible. "Let me find the right way to tell him."

Gabriel agreed to give me three days but emphasized that if I didn't act, he would keep his promise.

I left the study, spotting Cedric at the end of the hallway, laughing at something Raven had said. When he turned and smiled at me, I felt something wet slide down my cheek. I touched it in wonder, staring at the moisture on my fingertip.

Tears. For the first time in my centuries of existence, I was crying.

How do you tell your mate that you're the monster who destroyed his childhood?