Chapter 214 Chapter 214

Chapter 214 Chapter 214
TOR POV

Aiden thinks nothing of it, and that makes me feel like shit just as much as it gives me hope. I should probably let go of her hand, but I can't. Not when she's near tears and squeezing mine so tightly. And this—this—is what Aiden is feeling. The love of his life squeezing his hand.

"I know... but if she woke up and could talk and move again... I could bring her home. We could hire a live-in nurse while she recovers."

His hope is starting to climb to unrealistic levels, and that's not fair to him or Kyra. Or Elara. So I try to gently step in. There was a time a few years ago when we did this dance several times a week, and none of us can live like that again.

"Ash, she may not come back like that," I say quietly. I hate to kill his buzz in any way, but Elara suffered a severe brain injury. The chances of her ever being able to talk and make full sense are slim. "I think you need to really think about this long and hard and grill the shit out of the doctors about the experimental drugs and any case studies they have."

"I plan to. I'm just excited about any hope at this point. And I know she hears me. I can feel it. She knows I'm there."

"I'm sure she does," I agree, because I honestly do believe that wherever Elara's brain has gone, her heart knows that he's there with her.

I have an entirely new respect and understanding for the intense love that Aiden feels for Elara now, because that's how I feel about Kyra. I would do anything for her, and I'd never be able to give up on her.

"Kyra, why don't you come with me next week? I know it makes you uncomfortable, but maybe if she hears your voice too, it will help."

I already know she'll say no, and he does, too. Kyra can't handle seeing her mother like that, and I don't blame her at all. It's not easy in any way to see someone you love hovering somewhere between life and death. After the accident, Kyra would sit next to Elara's bed for hours and just cry and beg her to wake up. After having a few meltdowns that required the staff to give her sedatives, her grandmother and her aunt insisted she stop going.

"I can't," she says tearfully. "Please, Dad..."

Fuck. I hate that I can't put my arms around her and comfort her like I should be doing if this situation weren't so screwed up. This is sheer torture.

"Tor, tell him, please. I can't," she begs, and it's not unusual for her to put me in the middle. She's done it her entire life when she's scared or upset. It just feels way worse right now.

"Okay, let's all just calm down," I say. "You know how uncomfortable she feels there, Ash. Why don't you wait until after you talk to the doctors more, get some more info, and then we can decide if Kyra should go. I'll go, too," I suggest. "Maybe hearing all of our voices together will help. Maybe she'll remElara the old times."

Aiden nods. "That's a good idea. I'll definitely be getting more information and meeting with the specialists. Kyra, you know I don't want to upset you. I would never make you do anything you don't want to do."

Kyra stands and crosses the room to give him a big hug. "I know, Dad. I'm sorry. I love you, and I just miss Mom so much."

"I do, too. That's why I want to do whatever I can."

I excuse myself and go into the bathroom to give them a few minutes alone. Once there, I stare at myself in the mirror and splash some cold water on my face. I want Elara to recover, and I know we all have to have hope and think positive, but I don't want to see Aiden and Kyra get their hopes up only to have them shot to hell all over again.

And I could never voice this to them, but what if Elara did wake up but was absolutely nothing like herself? What if she can't speak, but instead moans and cries? What if she thrashes around and twists her body, instead of lying peacefully as she is now? They'll never be able to cope with seeing her that way.

I leave the hall bathroom and check my bedroom real quick. It feels weird having Aiden in my house, even though he's been here more times than I can count. I'm worried something personal of Kyra's could be lying around in a place it never should be. Like her panties tangled up in my bed sheets. Not that Aiden would be in my bedroom, but still.

When I join them, I'm glad to see they're playing with the dog and the kitten, and the mood is lighter and happier. Seeing them together in my living room, playing with my pets, only reminds me of how much I love them both and how I can't even consider losing either one of them. I wish I could pull Kyra into my arms and snuggle on the couch with her and have Aiden join us for a movie and just be a happy family. We've done it a hundred times, and now suddenly it’s all taboo and wrong.

When Aiden tells us he's going to head home, Kyra says she's going to stay for a while to finish watching our show, and he hugs us both goodbye before he leaves. Oblivious.

Betrayed.

I feel sick. Kyra looks sick.

Somewhere in hell, Satan has just pulled out a bag of marshmallows and is roasting them in my honor.

Kyra looks at me with guilt, chewing her bottom lip after she closes my front door behind her father.

"I'm sorry, Tor."

"We're going to have to tell him, Kyra."

"I know... after his mini tour though, please? He's worked so hard on all the new songs. It's not a long tour, maybe a month? When he gets back from that, we'll sit down with him together and tell him. Or I'll tell him alone, if that's better."

"No," I snapped. "We do it together."

"Okay."

She fingers the necklace around her neck nervously.

"I can't even think about what he's saying about my mom. Do you really think she'll ever be better?"

Her green eyes plead at me, and I wish I could say yes. I want her to have both her parents back and have a normal, happy life. It's all I've ever tried to give her—some normalcy and security.

"I honestly don't know, Angel. Your mom's accident, the trauma to her head, and the brain activity afterwards was unusual. The body and the brain are a fuckin' mystery. No matter how much doctors and scientists study it, there are always things that stump them. And unfortunately, there are times that no matter what, they can't make someone better. Like your dad said, all anyone can do is try. But miracles do happen."

"He thinks he can love her back to life, Tor. That's what he believes."

"Ya know what, Kyra? I wouldn't be at all surprised if he could."

She launches herself into my arms and kisses me like I've never been kissed before. It nearly knocks me over, and it has nothing to do with her throwing herself at me and everything to do with the depth of the love I can feel pouring out of her with every breath.

I want to push her down on the floor and kiss her lips until they bruise. I want to punish her for wanting me when she shouldn't, and thank her for wanting and loving me with so much of herself when I need it.

Young love... First love is so innocent. So pure and trusting. So all-encompassing. I shouldn't be on the receiving end of
that love from her at my age, but in all honesty... She's my first love, too.