Chapter 75

The vampire world is cruel. No matter how hard I try to understand, only pain and chest pain are returned to me.

The vampire world is painful. A world that has only come to life to give pain, hardship, and endless complications to those who love each other The vampire world is too cold. A world deprived of feeling the warmth of love.

The world I embraced and accepted despite fear and endless questions in my heart world that revealed my true personality, taught me how to appreciate every decision, motivated me to learn to sacrifice, and above all, taught me how to love purely.

The world that introduced me to the prince I love the most No matter how painful the events I experienced were, no matter how difficult and debilitating they were, they still could not compare to the joy that the prince I loved brought to this cruel world.

I've been trying to blend in and live like a real vampire, but this traitorous world keeps shattering my heart little by little.

It's been a month since Zen cursed both of us, and until now, there has been no 'cure' for it. I can't count on my fingers how many eunuchs Dastan has summoned from different empires to undo the curse, but none of them succeeded.

The queen of the mermaids is the one who said in the field of magic that I am the most powerful in this world and that I can cancel any curse, but what is the use of this power if I can't cure the curse that has landed on Zen and me?

I am still useless, as always.

The great news has also reached the different empires; even the wolves who are my friends have already extended secret help to me, Rosh, the entire Deltora, and the appointed women who have no choice but to visit me. They all have charms that Zen brought just for us, but no matter what we do, nothing happens; the curse is still here, and Zen continues to torture us.

The Gazellian brothers are not losing hope to help us both, but the prince I love so much makes me feel like giving up. We haven't seen each other in weeks; he prefers to travel outside the empire and stay away from me. I can't blame him for doing this.

I know it hurts him more when we see each other; even though we are close and the distance is within arm's reach, it seems like we are still very far away. Zen, and I couldn't even smile. We just stare at each other from afar; it's like cutting our hearts.

We're both hopeless. How many times have we relied on the babaylanes who come to the palace, and every time they shake our hands, our hearts break even more?

I am currently standing at the end of an artificial fountain inside the palace of Sartorias. I asked the Gazellians to, if possible, let me be alone, even for my bath. Because it has been cursed since Zen and I didn't lose our guard in fear that one of us would suddenly feel very thirsty and be forgotten by the curse.

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. When will my chest feel lighter? It's too heavy, and I don't know how long I can take it.

Instead of water in the spring, you can see pure milk here. I suddenly remembered how my grandmother used to bathe me every full moon.

I slowly untied my red robe and let it flow down my body. I started to step down into the spring milk and let it soak my whole body.

I just kept walking until the milk completely covered my chest. I closed my eyes again and let myself sink into the milky spring.

While my body was sinking, the situation between me and Zen continued to run through my mind. To this day, it is still unknown which of us, Zen, will possibly disappear the moment our skins touch. but everyone strongly believes that Zen and I will be the ones to disappear, like my grandmother and grandfather. And another reason was the bleaching of some strands of my hair.

When I felt my breath getting short, I quickly went up to get some air. I started to swim until I reached a step like that, and I chose to sit on it.

Half of my body was still soaked in milk.

I stared blankly across the fountain of milk and only found my right hand holding some white strands of my hair.

I just bit my lip while staring at it and trying to hold back my tears again. I'm afraid Zen will do the same thing my grandfather did. I'm afraid this is the last solution he can think of for both of us.

I don't want to get to the point where Zen does what I fear. A few days after Zen cursed us, Grandpa told me everything. I thought I would never hear the reason why she and my grandmother are no longer together, but it looks like this is the right time for me to find out.

While grandpa was telling stories, my tears didn't stop falling. Did grandma feel this same pain when she and grandpa were cursed? Grandfather admitted that he himself had his men capture grandmother to forcefully push her through his glasses and bring her back to the human world. Even though my grandmother strongly objected and wanted to stay in this world, my grandfather didn't let her because they would only continue to be hurt.

Right in front of grandfather's eyes, grandmother completely disappeared and returned to the human world. And what crushed my heart the most was that my grandfather himself broke the glass so that my grandmother would never return to the world of vampires.

I just sank into my palms while thinking about my grandfather's story. This is my biggest fear; I don't want Zen himself.

Toss me. I don't want to leave him in this world; I don't want to live in a world without him.

I immediately wiped the tears from my eyes when I felt a presence behind me.

"I'm sorry for the busy set goddess; I just want to let you know that you have a guest waiting outside." Even if I wanted to send this guest away and tell him to come next time, I couldn't do it.

"Who?" I will ask. I remained silent, not facing the follower.

"Prince Rosh Alistair Le'Vamuievos." I nodded slowly.

"I'll follow." I didn't hear a reply from the follower until he left. I rinsed myself and got ready quickly.

I wasn't surprised when I saw that Rosh was already on his way, currently facing the palace window.

"How are you?" he asked without bothering to look back at me.

"Dying in pain." I answered briefly.

"You can't die yet; you know that." I smiled bitterly at him.

"It seems that you are visiting the palace more often, Rosh; maybe the vampires who saw us will think differently," I just said, even though I knew that there was no reason for Rosh to visit the palace.

Rosh did not answer me and remained staring outside the palace. We stayed silent for about three minutes before I heard Rosh speak again.

"Know I feel zen now. I've been there, and I almost killed myself when the girl I was waiting for didn't come. But his situation is far worse, Claret; you're here. He sees you, feels your presence, and inhales your fragrant blood, but he cannot touch you. I am sorry, Claret; I don't need your Zen help anymore. You've been my good friend, despite everything I've done. You gave me hope for the girl I've been waiting for for hundreds of years. I am sorry, Claret. I don't know why my tears suddenly began to flow. My chest is heavy; I want to breathe easy. I don't want this anymore.

I just felt Rosh convert me, and he hugged me tightly. I can feel him gently caressing my very long hair.

"Just cry, Claret, just cry." I cried more and more when he said it. I could also feel him gently touching the white strands of my hair, and I heard him cursing softly because of it.

"Rosh, why me and Zen? Why did Zen curse us? Why are you trying to separate us?" My lips are itching as I ask Rosh, who is still hugging me.

"I'm sorry, I can't answer your question, Claret." He held both of my cheeks and gently wiped away my tears.

"Don't disappear, Claret, promise me. I want to meet my goddess with you. I want to be one of the first vampires to meet the woman I will love." I said softly.

nodded at what Rosh said.

"I stopped bringing babaylans, but I hope the thing I brought today will help." In an instant, Rosh handed me a red rose.

"I have to go." He nodded softly at me before he passed by himself, turning into pieces of flowers until he completely disappeared from my sight.

What does he say he brought?

Because I can only be alone by taking a bath, I chose to soak in the milk again and be alone with it. I spent over three hours here before Lily picked me up and informed me that Zen was here.

I really want to see him, but something tells me that it's better to stay here and not hurt myself.

"Claret, you and Zen need to talk; if you both become weak, the possibility of losing the curse will disappear." I just nodded to what Lily said. He waited for me to get dressed, and we left the room together.

"Where will we go?" I asked in surprise as we passed the room where we all often met.

Lily didn't answer me, and we continued walking until we came to a door.

"Zen is waiting inside," Lily said shortly, causing my chest to tremble. Why do I feel bad about this happening?

Lily opened the door for me. And when I started to step into the dark room, I heard the door close, which made the nervousness in my chest accelerate.

"Zen?" Every step I take is a light.

of candles on my way. And when I hit the back of the man I love the most, my chest relaxed a little.

I stepped closer to him with my hands raised and shaking. I want to touch him. I really want to touch him. When I reached the back of Zen, who was currently sitting, I stopped my hands and fell to my knees.

"Zen, I miss you. I miss you so much," I said softly. I saw Zen lean his head back. Leaned?

When I tried to touch Zen, I realized that something had come between our glasses. He kept his back to me while leaning on it.

"I miss you more, Claret. I miss you more, baby." I came closer to him and leaned my forehead against the mirror.

"Zen..Zen..Zen..dear prince.." I called his name again and again as my tears fell.

"Claret." He just called my name.

"Zen, I want to see you. I want to see my prince's face. Why don't you face me? Zen..." I only heard his gentle movements, but I knew he still didn't face me.

"I can't look at you with your eyes full of tears. I want to wipe your tears, Claret; I want to caress your cheeks; I want to hug you; I want to kiss you. My chest tightens every time I see you in tears, and I can't do anything but watch you." I slowly raised my hands that were placed on my prince's hair that I wanted to touch before.

"Do you think you're the only Zen? I'm hurt too. I'm hurt too. But please look at me. I want to see you. I want to see you, dear prince. Turn around, Zen, please." I pressed my forehead to the mirror again while bending down in tears. but my tears softened even more when I felt that Zen also stuck his forehead to the mirror opposite me.

"I love you so much, Claret. I love you so much, your beautiful eyes, your warm smile, your sweet laughter, your addictive lips, your everything, baby. You are the only woman I will love until the last drop of my blood. You're my beautiful wife..my beautiful deity..my love of my life.." I pulled away from the mirror and gently caressed it as if I were holding Zen.

"Zen, I don't like this. You're not saying goodbye, are you? We will fight, won't we? There are many people who support both of us. We will defeat the curse. We are the first to beat the curse." I said nervously.

I saw Zen's eyes turn red at me, his red eyes full of love.

"I love you so much, Claret. And I will love you forever even if we are apart. You need to go back, baby. You need to go back. I don't want the girl I love to disappear from this world."

Charger 75

I can hear what I fear; I can hear the words I fear coming from the man I love the most. I don't want to come back; I don't want to leave this world. No matter how cruel and painful it is to stay in the world of vampires, I would still choose to stay here with him.

I love him so much. I don't want to leave him; I don't want us to be separated just because of a curse. No curse can separate us; we are stronger than any curse created in this world.

I shook my head hard at him while my hot tears did not stop falling. I held my itchy hands to the mirror.

"Zen, you're hurting me again. I thought you wouldn't throw me away? I thought you wouldn't let me go back to my world? I'm here, this is my world too, Zen. You're here, the man I love the most is here. Don't throw me away like this. We'll fight together, we'll fight this curse together. Don't be like this, Zen." The redness in his eyes disappeared, and he leaned his forehead against the mirror again.

"How, baby? How? I've seen this curse in different generations. No one has defeated Claret. Nothing. Nothing, baby. Nothing. Nothing." Zen starts punching the floor, and with each punch it turns to ice.

"Zen, we will be the first to defeat the curse. Will you just give up? Will you just give up on me? What's the point of waiting a little while we don't touch? You have waited for me for so many years, Zen.

you for a long time. Are you going to give up now? Are you still going to give up on me? We've been through a lot, and we've gotten through it all. We can also be zen. "Don't let me live Zen. I'm in pain. I'm in pain, dear prince. " My voice is also cracking as I speak. We can't give up. We can't. We can't.

"Baby, I've seen it. Four times my eyes have witnessed this curse, Claret. I don't want you to melt in my eyes. I don't want what I saw to happen to you. From my mother's bloodline, a royal blood from Deltora, my friend, and even your grandparents, Claret. My Claret eyes have seen all this. I witnessed all this. Nothing, baby..nothing..nothing..no one has lost..................." Zen almost hit his forehead on the mirror. Even I was discouraged by what he was saying.

Are we really hopeless? Is it really gone?

"Zen" was the only thing I could pronounce.

"You know why I hated Leon so much, Claret?" he suddenly asked me. I frowned at his question. What does a grandfather have to do with what we are talking about?

I couldn't answer him; instead, I just stared at him. I'm getting weak with my feelings. My chest doesn't stop aching, the tightness doesn't stop, and the pain doesn't stop.

"I hated him, Claret, because I've seen it, baby. I've seen everything, baby. I was still a kid back then when I witnessed that terrible scene. I used to think that Leon was too heartless to be forced If he throws away his partner, how can he handle living without her? How can he treat her like that? She's begging and wants to stay, but he's too heartless to push her away. But now that I'm experiencing it, I understand everything, Claret. I would rather be away from you than see you slowly dissolve in my eyes. Your grandmother survived Claret. and he even raised you right. You grew up strong, beautiful, and kind-hearted. I know you can handle it too, Claret. With every word Zen utters, my heart aches more and more. I don't want. I don't want. I don't hear anything. I don't want.

I just shook my head at Zen's words.

"No, no, no. No, no. I don't want Zen. I'm just here, Zen. I am not a strong girl. I can't do it without you, Zen. I can't go back to the human world. I can't go back. My life is already here. You are my world, Zen. You are my world, dear prince. Why do you support me? Why are you doing this to me, Zen?" I can hardly breathe properly because of the tightness in my chest. I can't even see because of my non-stop tears. I don't want to go back; no matter what he says, I won't go back. I'm just here.

"Claret, it won't be long before our thirst for each other grows stronger. We can't stop ourselves. It's too risky for us, for you, baby. We can't be together, Claret, we can't be together anymore. You will only get hurt more if you stay in this world." I hit the glass that separated us both.

"Why? Why Zen? Why are you like this? Can't you fight with me? Why are you so Why are you giving up now? Even if you bring me back to the human world, I can still feel the pain! It won't go away even if you take me back to my world! Please, I'm just here. We can always look at each other, and we can always talk to each other. I am happy even if I just see you; I will be satisfied to feel your presence. Don't send me away, Zen; we can find a solution to this curse." I don't know where else my eyes are getting tears from. They are never ending.

"You're saying that, Claret, because you didn't witness the curse. I've seen it, baby. And only Olivia survived. I don't want you to dissolve like those cursed before. I can't handle it, Claret. You're safe in the human world. You're safe away from me." I did nothing but shake my head at what he was saying.

"What's the value of being safe if I'm not with you, Zen? If I can't see you? If I can't feel your presence? Don't push me away, Zen. I know there is someone who can help us both. We are not the only ones fighting the curse. We're not just two Zens. We have your family, our friends, and the whole empire. They all want to help us; they all support us. Don't lose hope.." I caressed the glass again as if I were holding the face of my prince.

Zen also slowly raised his right hand and placed it on my hand.

"Look at me, baby. Look at my eyes. Answer me honestly. Aren't you tired, Claret?

How many people have tried to help us? How many times have we hoped? You just keep getting hurt in this world. Do you think it doesn't hurt me every time you try to smile at me when a boy doesn't do anything? Do you think I'm not hurt while watching you with sad eyes? Claret, I'm hurting the most. I just bit my lip at Zen's words.

"My chest hurts, Claret. My chest hurts every time I see you in tears, every time I see you staring at me, every time you try to smile, and every time you try to be strong. I want to touch you badly; I want to caress your hair; I want to feel you, baby; and I want to kiss you endlessly. But I only gave you tears, Claret; I don't want to see you suffer anymore." My hands completely disappeared from the glass.

"Do you love me, Zen? Do you love me? Why is it easy for you to return me to my world? Do you not want to see me anymore? I don't want to leave Zen, no matter what you say, I don't want to leave. I'm just here, I'm just here, dear prince." I quickly wiped my tears from my eyes because I couldn't see him properly anymore.

"I love you so much, Claret. I love you so much. I'm doing this for you. I can't keep you in this world, baby. I can't keep you here just to suffer. You don't deserve this, baby." Zen answered me weakly. I can't stop crying and shaking at what he says.

"Claret, you will always remember that you are the only woman I will love. You are the only goddess in the prince's of snow. I love you so much, beautiful goddess from the mirror. My whole body trembled at Zen's last words, especially when I felt a different presence of vampires from behind me.

My hands came up again, and I held them to the glass that was between us. I pressed myself closer to the mirror. I shook my head at Zen as my eyes filled with tears. But he chose to tear his eyes away from me.

"I don't want to look back, Zen. I don't want to look back. I'm thinking wrong, Zen. I don't want to look back. You won't do to me what I'm thinking. You won't do it to me will you? Zen, you love me, don't you? You love me. I won't look back. I won't look back. Zen, Zen..you won't do to me what I think. It's not hereditary is it? You love me, don't you? Zen! Look at me please...........................................................

"I love you, Claret. I love you. I love you so much." I felt someone holding my arms. and my whole body got even more excited when I recognized them as Evan and Caleb.

"I am so sorry, Claret," Caleb said softly. I started to struggle when the brothers stood me up.

"No! No! No! Zen! I don't want to leave! Don't do this to me." I was getting lost in Evan and Caleb's arms, but I couldn't do anything. I tried to use my power, but it didn't work. What happened to me? What's happening to me? Why didn't anything come out?

that powers me? Why now?

"Make it faster, Caleb, Evan," Zen said softly, as if he poured ice water on me. I tried to meet his eyes, but he couldn't look at me.

Zen came out of the mirror and followed us. I saw that Finn was fixing the huge mirror from which I came. It's like before, I almost went crazy looking for this mirror so I could go home, but now I'm so scared to see it. I was very afraid to face it.

I'm starting to get closer to the mirror, but I'm struggling. I forced myself to look back at Zen, who was quietly behind me.

"Zen! Zen! Zen! Please look at me, baby. You love me, don't you? I thought you loved me? I love you so much, Zen. I love you so much. Don't throw me away, don't do this. You want me to stop at Deltora first, you want me to stop at Grandpa first if I'm afraid we'll hold hands. Don't be like this, Zen. Don't throw me away like this.." I started to cry. I didn't look at him anymore because he couldn't look at me anymore. I was still struggling with Evan and Caleb, who remained silent as they brought me closer to the mirror.

I was trying to catch the eyes of Evan, Caleb, and even Finn, who was also waiting near the mirror.

"Caleb...Evan..Finn..it's like pity. I don't want to leave, I don't want to leave, I don't want to leave. Don't be like this. Don't throw me away..I don't want to leave yet." I shook my head at Evan and Caleb. Even these three did not meet my eyes. Across When I struggled, I felt that Evan and Caleb were careful not to hurt me.

I'm getting closer to the mirror; I'm only a little away from it.

"I don't want. I don't want. I don't want." I felt Caleb stop walking slightly.

"Caleb," Evan said emphatically.

"Fuck! Hurry up!" Zen said loudly, causing the two of them to hold me even tighter.

"Zen, you're so cruel. You're so cruel..." I said again and again as the siblings brought me closer to the mirror.

"I love you, Claret Cordelia Amor." I closed my eyes and let them push me.

I waited for me to fall like the first time I passed through the mirror, but instead of this, I felt a warm hug that made me wake up.

"WHAT THE FUCKING HELL ARE YOU DOING ZEN?!" Lily's voice echoed as she hugged me tightly.

I immediately hugged Lily with my itchy body.

"Lily, Lily, Lily. They are trying to bring me back to the human world. I don't want it. I don't want it. I'm here, Lily. Don't leave me with them. They will bring me back to the world of people." Lily hugged me tighter while stroking my hair.

"WHAT THE HELL IS THIS ZEN?! YOU?! Why did you give in to what your brother wanted?!" Lily shouted again. They all couldn't answer Lily.

"She needs to go back, Lily. It will dissolve."

He's the only one in this world; I'd rather be far away from him than to see him dissolve." The embrace of Okay Lily deepened.

"Isn't that the same thing?! Claret will also disappear when you return him to the human world! You'll lose him too!" Lily shouted again.

"But she'll not die there! You wanted her to stay? You want her to stay here where at any moment she can turn into a bubble?! You're not afraid Lily! since you are not the one to lose! You are not the one to lose! I will lose it if something bad happens to him. I will lose Lily. I want the girl I love to live. I want him to live." I just kept crying at Zen's words.

"Why Zen? What are we, Claret? We love Claret too! We wouldn't help if we didn't love Claret! We will also be lost when he disappears! You need to fight back, brother. I understand you; I know that among our siblings you are the one who witnessed the disappearance of those who experienced this curse, but Zen is fighting Claret; the girl you love is fighting. We are fighting, your brothers; defeat the curse; we are always behind." I saw that Zen had completely fallen to his knees.

"I'm scared, Lily. I'm scared." I just stared at Zen at what he said. I've never seen him like this. Lily let go of me and slowly approached her brother to hug him.

I also want to hug him at this time, but I can't do anything but watch him.

"I know..I know. Even vampires are afraid, Zen; even princes like you are afraid. That's why we're here, Zen; that's why we're here, your brothers. We're here to support you and Claret." Lily gently caressed her sister's back.

"Zen..." I called him softly.

"There's still hope; Dastan is back, and with him is the last vampire who can help you both.".