_\*Where the fuck did you go, Devi?\*_ The text from Jack pops up in the corner of my eye imbed, blinking yellow with increased urgency. I’ve ignored too many of his messages over the last few hours, and now they appear urgent. If I keep ignoring them, I’ll start to get a zap with each one. I skim it, then reach into my pocket to silence his notifications like I’ve been doing all morning—again and again since around six when the club officially closed.
It’s only a matter of time until I’m forced to answer him, or he’ll show up at my door. Thankfully, no one told him they saw me leaving early, or he would’ve shown up already. Shit, I was supposed to see Sass before I left. I sigh into a cup of warmed tea with an energy additive. For once, I had the funds to stop off and grab a cup, though I’m trying not to consider the circumstances.
I’m allowed small joys even when the world is burning down around me. Especially when I haven’t slept.
“Deviera, how many Thur do typical bond houses consist of?” Lyra, the course director, asks, bringing my attention back to Service Sundries. She’s holding the projection module that broadcasts our answers to any
Thur overseers. Her eyes glint with an awareness that I haven’t given her my full attention. I haven’t slept since before work last night, but I can recount most of the bookwork by heart. It is applying the concepts that gives me trouble.
“Typically, they range from three to six,” I answer. I devoured that section of our textbook, rereading it twice over a glass of glees. Relationships are interesting no matter what, especially when centered around an alien species that takes multiple partners like the Thur do. Their bondings are fascinating. Between the number of partners and the idea of a central bond who receives the most attention, I can’t help but imagine myself in their place. Of course, our books are not detailed, and the Thur are not forthcoming about the inner workings of their bonds, but still, it’s enough to inspire fantasies… Emer’s gleaming gemstones heating against my damp thighs… Selk’s mod vibrating against my nipples when he hums…
I blow out a breath and clench my hands. I’ve heard that middlings in the Thur cities of Lumoria live with looser relationship ties than those in the middling-run cities of New Eden, but even here, there are no relationships between us and them. Sure, purely sexual ones exist. Even a master and pet dynamic has become more popular over time. But a Thur bond with a middling?
Never. Similar to one between a Darkmire and a Lighfleck. I try not to consider the relationship between Selk and Emer because thinking of them raises my blood pressure.
I’ve never had a real relationship, and I’m not even sure if my demons could handle one. But if I \*_was\*_ looking, and if they \*_were_\* all Thur…? My mind unhelpfully supplies the striking features of the males I met last night. Emer’s bulk alone would feel amazing pressing me into the sheets, his dense thigh parting mine with ease—
“Correct, Deviera. And of the group, how do you identify the head of household?” Lyra presses, oblivious to how shameful my train of thought is most days. Sex plays on a loop. Every person I meet, every person I see walking on the street. It doesn’t matter. Each one has an equal opportunity to trigger thoughts of what I could be doing with them instead. It’s like a drive I can’t seem to turn off, no matter how much I hate it. Most of the time, I’m not distracted by them, letting them flutter in and out of my mind without noticing. But the males from last night didn’t leave me so lucky.
They’re plaguing my brain and my libido.
“Deviera, shall I pass the question on to someone else?”
I refocus. Once brought into a household, we’re given explicit training on the family we will be serving. On day one, each of us should know exactly who leads the house. At my confused expression, she clarifies. “How will you know who you should address first among a group of Thur you have never met? How will you know who receives first service or first accommodation?” The group again flashes in my mind, reminding me of how suffocated I felt when they first entered the room.
Of how badly I fucked that entire exchange up.
“Through… their presence. Their magic’s aura?”
“Incorrect. Valence?”
“Through their deference among one another,” a gentle-sounding blond says from the front row.
“Correct,” Lyra agrees, and I realize why that is the correct answer. Last night was a fluke, full of small mistakes that turned catastrophic. That isn’t how we’re supposed to handle those situations as service providers. “We will always receive either a briefing upon hire or we will observe the room to see how they approach one another. There are always cues as to who is in deferment and to whom receives the deference. Everyone get ready to move to the summative room for the next hour of training.”
But as Lyra begins to return to her post, she looks down at her modular screen and then turns back to me. “How do you know what you’re feeling is magic?” She asks me, her head canted curiously. Is this a question from her or one of the overseers? I think back to the night before and the powerful auras from Selk and Emer. Their magic seemed to occupy the space around them, like a barrier I could almost taste. Subtle shifts in air temperature or thickness. I hadn’t noticed it at the time, but as I reflected, I understood it better.
Neither compared to the intensity of the cold one with the black eyes either. His aura was a tangible black field, I’m convinced of it. I knew without a doubt, even if he hadn’t silenced their argument, Selk and Emer were under his thumb.
“I’m not sure why I said that,” I huff, knowing I can’t offer any insight into the night before. I’m not supposed to remember it, and we never know when an overseer is peering in on the class. “I just assumed that the Settled would have different effects on us than the Unsettled because they’re so much stronger.”
The class begins to murmur as they prepare for the next practice circuit.
“Interesting theory. I wouldn’t know.” She shrugs, glancing down at her device. “Have you ever met a Settled Thur?”
The head shake is instinctual, fear following me as closely as it did in the early hours of the morning.
She nods. “No, of course, you wouldn’t have. Everyone, we’ll be practicing table setting in five minutes!”
As Lyra wanders back off to the doorway to escort the others, I take my time packing up.
It took me hours to settle down after I fled Mid. Even loaded with the sakrin chips tucked into my coat, nothing scared me more than the idea the males were simply waiting in the alleyways to rectify their mistake. They didn’t actually wipe my memory. How long would it take for them to realize? Safely home and locked behind the security system, every sound outside my building still had me checking the windows for signs of them, but none came. I counted the chips and recounted it when I couldn’t believe the number. They left me a thousand sakrin bundled in neat little piles of chips. It wasn’t a tip at all.
It was a bribe.
Its weight still burns a hole in the bottom of my class bag, waiting for me to head to the depository.
I shake my head. Four times as much as I’ve ever made in a week, let alone a night. My stomach growls, reminding me I haven’t eaten since sometime yesterday morning. Maybe I’ll stop off for a real meal as a treat for surviving that shit show.
An hour after class ends, I drop off the last of my books at the depot and head for the depository. At the entrance, I scan my un-modded eye, and a metallic door slides open. Once I load all the chips, I wait for the tech to sort and tally my total. And then, finally, I scan my eye once more to deposit it into my account. When I’m sure I’ve secured my funds, and no one can take them from me, I switch off the silencer on Jack’s notifications, letting them pop up on my eye imbed, one after another.
They each send a jolt of electricity up my spine.
_\*Devi, what the fuck happened to the lithe?\*_
_\*Answer me! You take off without closing out your books. Then I checked your room only to find a broken carafe all over the floor, and my cameras shattered to shit. What the fuck happened, and where the fuck are you?\*_
_\*Went to your apartment. No answer. I swear to fuck, if you come in tonight, we’re having a long talk.\*_
_\*Answer the goddamn phone, Deviera! They paid for your tab and their room total, including the lithe. You’re not in trouble, but you need to tell me what the fuck happened.\*_
I don’t even know what to say when a text from Ry pops up.
\*_Got some free time. Spar?\*_
My stomach is leaden as dread sinks deeper. My appetite is long gone as I let my feet carry me toward public transport. As I text Ry back to let him know I’ll be at our usual spot, I can’t help but consider what Jack said. When did the lithe break open, and where did all that liquid go?