Chapter Eighteen

Elliot approached the gazebo with measured strides, unable to take his eyes off the one who got away. With so much emotion darkening his features, he looked so handsome. A pang of regret echoed through Ginger’s chest.

This was the absolute right thing to do for Elliot and for the show, but never in a million years would Ginger have expected it to hurt.

It. Hurt. His slow march toward the love of his life put actual, physical pain in her stomach.

Jenna lowered her gaze when he reached her. “Hey, baby.”

“Hello.”

Hug her.

Their eyes met a moment before Jenna reached for him. Their embrace was awkward, uncomfortable to watch, Jenna’s fingers pressed into his shirt hard enough to leave marks on his skin, and Elliot gently tapped her shoulder. He pulled away first, taking a step back and shifting his focus to Lavonne and Davis.

Ever the host, Davis spun the narrative. “This must be a surprise,” he said.

Elliot nodded, jaw clenched, before latching back onto Jenna’s gaze.

“We’ll let her tell you in her own words, but Jenna reached out to the show to let us know things hadn’t been working out between her and Eric. She’s here for a second chance, if you’ll have her.”

“That’s what this is?” Elliot blurted, his eyes wide with fury or surprise.

Fury, Ginger thought. It was definitely fury. He was pissed.

“Why don’t we have a seat?” Lavonne gestured toward the round bistro table at the center of the gazebo.

The four of them sat, Elliot across from Jenna, and waited for the cameras to find their new positions.

Lavonne kicked things off. “Jenna, honey, why don’t you go ahead and tell Elliot what you told me and The Panel yesterday.”

Elliot’s folded hands tightened on each other.

Jenna cleared her throat and took a deep breath until she was sitting ramrod straight in her chair. “I can’t imagine what you must be thinking right now.”

Her words were met with complete silence. The tension on the hillside grew over seconds that lasted centuries. Ginger’s stomach was in knots. She scanned the nearby area for a flowerpot to puke in if it came to that.

Finally, Jenna spoke up. “Elliot, I made a mistake. A huge mistake. Saying I’m sorry won’t cut it, so I want to explain.”

Elliot gave her a careful nod, his face devoid of all expression.

“After the show wrapped, I went through kind of a depression. So much had been happening, we’d all been having so much fun, and then it was all over. I started seeing Eric on a regular basis, but right from the start, I knew I’d screwed up. I missed you every day.”

Davis leaned in. “Why was Eric your choice, Jenna?”

Like the reality star she was, she aimed her answer at Elliot. “The Panel thought Eric and I would be a perfect match. Our values are so similar, we live in the same state—nothing had to change in my life to accommodate a relationship with him. But it was a conversation I had with my mom that got me feeling nervous about you.

“My family liked you, but they convinced me you were like all the other men I’d dated in the past—all the ones who left me heartbroken and hating myself.”

Duh, Ginger thought. That was the whole point of the show. The Panel kept the star from repeating the same stupid mistakes they always made. Jenna’d always been with bad boys. Elliot was a bad boy—more or less—the baddest one they’d had that season anyway. He was click bait for women with poor impulse control, herself included.

But Jenna was no idiot, and her explanation wasn’t exactly winning Elliot over.

Lavonne took a swing at managing the conversation. After all, the goal was for Jenna to stay, not to have Elliot kick her out without giving her a chance. “What do you think your Panel missed, honey? Why do you think they got it so wrong? And why did you go along with their decision if you wanted something else?”

Jenna addressed Lavonne, on her best behavior. “I think my Panel thought I wanted someone to take care of me, I was scared of my own feelings, and they were able to convince me Elliot wasn’t a safe choice. I was a mess—my feelings for him were—” She shook her head. “I was afraid to follow my heart—this process is so confusing, and it digs up some demons. But what I’ve realized since, is I wanted someone to care for, too. I wanted us to care for each other. Elliot and I always talked about how we were looking for partners. Someone to dive into the future with headfirst and make sure the other didn’t drown, you know?”

Lavonne reached out, her hand patting Elliot’s knuckles. “Elliot, do you have any questions for Jenna? Anything you’d like to say?”

“I’d like to know if I have any choices here.” He cut a glance Ginger’s way, and she flinched like it was an actual slap.

“Obviously this is unorthodox,” Davis began. “That’s why we wanted to speak with you privately before we move forward.”

Elliot cast a glance down the lens of every camera even remotely facing him. “Right. Thanks for that courtesy.”

Fuck, they couldn’t use this. He was supposed to be emotional, not a jackass. Ginger sent a hard stare Davis’s way, needing him to get control.

Davis took the unspoken note. “The Panel is on board with giving Jenna the second chance she’s asking for. We understand it may be awkward at first, so they’ve given her the equivalent of a save this week. Everyone agreed they saw something real developing between the two of you last season, and they’d like to give you a chance to reconnect. See if you can find that same spark again.”

Elliot glared at the well-meaning host. “So the answer’s no, Davis. Right? That’s what I’m hearing?”

Shit. “Can we—let’s take five.” Ginger stepped into the fray as the camera’s lights went from green to red. “Elliot, a minute?”

He shoved away from the table and walked quickly back to the house, anger rippling off him like heat waves.

Ginger steeled herself and hurried after him.

By the time she reached the house, he was pacing the sitting room. “We need you to calm down,” she said before he started shouting at her.

“Fuck you.”

“Right, well…I can see you’re a little thrown off by this.”

“Thrown off?” He stopped pacing and shot her a hateful look. “Did you do this?”

Gulping, she couldn’t manage to swallow the huge lump blocking her throat. An urge to scream I’m sorry! rocked her body, making her shudder. But her feelings didn’t matter. Bringing Jenna back was the right thing—the only thing. “For you. I did this for you. We’ve never had a second chance story, and this is beautiful, right? She still loves you. She came back for you.”

“You want me with her?”

“I want you…”

His head slanted to the side, waiting for her to finish a sentence she was afraid might have been complete. “I want the happy ending.”

He gestured toward the gazebo. “How is this fair?”

It wasn’t. It was a mistake—a stupid plan based on the fear of losing everything. A bad judgment like so many other mistakes she’d made with him this season. “If you guys fell for each other last season like I know you did, and she says you did, then you owe it to each other to forgive and try again.”

“I don’t owe her anything,” he said, voice glacier-cold.

“You loved her.”

“She humiliated me.”

Ginger’s eyes closed at the searing pain in his voice. This was awful. When she managed to look at him again, his expression gave nothing away. Walls up, he was shutting down. She sensed it in every cell. For the first time in her career, Ginger knew she’d gone too far.

“Marlon must be really impressed,” he said, like he could read her thoughts.

She exhaled shakily, beyond ashamed, but before she could say another word, he shouldered past her, on his way back to the gazebo, to do the job she’d asked him to do.

“Well, that was almost a total catastrophe. What did you say to chill him out?”

Kat plopped down on the lounge chair next to Ginger’s by the pool. The crew was all set up for tonight’s elimination, but the women had another half hour to primp before filming began. Ginger had made it her goal to avoid Elliot since the sun set on the gazebo reconciliation, and since it was chilly outside, she’d been alone for the last several minutes.

They’d be at the Hacienda all night, dealing with the women’s reactions to having Jenna back. It would be great TV, if they managed to keep it from turning into a shitshow.

“Nothing. He needed a few minutes to make up his mind about how he felt.” That was all true enough.

“Doing it with Lavonne and Davis at the gazebo was smart. I looked at some of the footage. So beautiful. Romantic actually,” Kat added, sounding wistful. “Jenna was perfect.”

“Yeah.” She had been. Perfect.

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” Ginger said. “It’s great. This is all awesome. Best idea ever. It’s gonna be a great season.”

Kat swung her legs over the side of her lounge chair and faced Ginger, her hands folded between her knees. “You’ve never liked Jenna.”

“No. I never have.”

“So why’d you bring her back?”

“We already talked about this.” Elliot’s lack of engagement, the show swirling down the drain. The audience…

“And I still think you’re full of shit.”

Ginger covered her face, pretending it was only to rub her eyes, not to hold in the intense anxiety pounding through her veins. She’d thought Jenna’s return would feel triumphant. But this felt like complete shit.

“You don’t do anything without calculating every possible scenario. You knew this could turn into a total temper tantrum. So what gives? Why do you want him to wind up with Jenna? Has he mentioned her to you? Is he not over her? Was this his idea?”

“It was a mistake. Okay? He didn’t ask to have her here—it was all me. I did this. It’s my fault.”

“Fault? What? No one’s blaming anyone. This is a good twist. I’m trying to figure out what went into it. Teach me your brilliant ways, sensei.”

Ginger pushed herself up to sit. “I like him, all right? I want him to get what he came here for and more, and he got devastated last time. She devastated him. If they can work it out—great. If they can’t, then he gets to move on with someone he sees a better future with, but he won’t know until he sorts through his feelings about her.” Too much emotion powered her words, and the effect wasn’t lost on Kat.

“How much do you like him, Ginj?”

“It’s not like that!”

Kat blinked, taken aback, as Ginger hurried to stand. “Sorry. I’m sorry.”

Kat stood with her, pressing her hands onto Ginger’s shoulders. “Hey. He’s an amazing guy. You’ve been spending a lot of time together. I get it if there’s some jealousy or whatever.”

“Jealousy? No.” Ginger shook her head, adamant. “What?”

Giving her arms a squeeze, Kat let go. “You can talk to me. For real. I owe you, remember? If there’s anyone you can trust in this ridiculous place, it’s me. You know that, right?”

“I don’t need to talk. But yes. Thank you. You’re my girl. I got it.”

“I am your girl. And you’re mine. You’re stuck with me.”

Kat was rarely warm and fuzzy during working hours, but when she was, it felt like sunshine on a windy day, a miracle in the midst of this mess. Ginger was grateful.

“So what say we go set off a bomb in the elimination room?”

Ginger pulled herself together and prepared to ride the bomb blast straight into her future.