Chapter 231 Chapter 231
Jesse couldn’t help wondering if him telling Leah they were mates was why Evanna had come out when she’d woken and not Leah. It constantly churned around in his head, he needed to know more. Did the doctor have all the answers to his questions? Should he just start asking Evanna and Leah? He didn’t know and it was distracting the hell out of him. He looked over to see Evanna was looking out the window. She hadn’t said more than ten words since she woke up. Had Leah communicated with her what he’d told her? Could they even do that? Evanna was straightforward, she’d say something if she knew. At least he figured she would. “Are you okay?”
She looked at him, the light from the dash highlighting her eyes. “I’m just thinking about stuff.”
“Anything I can help with?” Just blurting out questions was a bad idea he decided.
“That video call, I was close, watching—what were they talking about with the weapons training?”
That caught him off guard for a second, he hadn’t expected that at all. “Blair and his mate Kobie are going to be part of the team that goes in to get ours out, for the most part, it’s going to be situations that shifting and using our animals aren’t possible, so the Alliance makes sure we know how to handle a variety of weapons.”
“Our? You’re part of this team?”
“I am. I’ve been doing this for five years now.”
“Have you rescued many?”
“Personally? I’ve only been on a few of the actual ops, I’m usually the one waiting on the sidelines to get those found out and back to safety.”
“Where do they go—for safety?”
“That varies. Usually back to their clan or a clan of the same. Those that aren’t ready to go back or have nowhere to go are either in safe houses or at Devin and Rayne’s campground.”
“I meant what I said, I don’t want to be dumped off somewhere.” She glanced at him, “Leah doesn’t do well around strangers and Minn seems to have accepted you, so we’re staying with you.”
“As much as I’d love that, I don’t spend a lot of time at home, I’m on the road a lot and I will be going on the trips to those addresses and a few other locations.”
“Give me this weapons training and I can come and help.”
He looked at her briefly while he was at the stop sign, “I don’t see Leah dealing well with it.”
“Obviously I’d be driving the body then, not her.” She shrugged, “and if Minn is required, you know she can handle herself.”
He wanted to explain why he wasn’t comfortable with her going. It wasn’t a question of her abilities, he had no doubt she would be able to handle herself, it was more the fact that he didn’t want his mate involved, put on a dangerous path. “I know she can, you as well, but we can’t know how Leah, you, or Minn are going to react when you’re back there.” He rubbed his hand along his jaw, “it’s going to stir up a lot of memories.”
“I didn’t think of that.” She looked out the window again, “what if I’m part of the team that stays back and helps to get them to safety?”
“And what are you planning to do with Thera during this?” He turned to see the creature watching them.
Evanna looked at the leopard. “I didn’t think of that either.”
“We can’t have a real leopard running around in the city.”
“No, I guess not. Leah isn’t going to let her be put in a cage again.”
“No one will put her in a cage, we just have to find somewhere she can run free as she did on the mountain.” In his mind he was going over the terrain on his property, trying to figure out how hard it would be to fence it in. It was a big chunk of land, with lots of trees, and even a river ran through it. He’d never planned to fence the property, just install a few cameras around the border, but a camera wasn’t going to contain Thera—or Minn in her frantic moments. He would have to talk to his father about sending someone out to assess if it could be done.
“There’s ah—” she stopped and looked out the window and sighed loudly, “I’ve never told anyone,” She turned back to him.
Jesse made sure she saw him looking at her, that she had his full attention before he turned back to the road. “You can tell me anything, I won’t share it with anyone unless you want me to.” He hoped that was what she needed to hear.
“Yeah, I get that feeling from you.” She made a noise, “this is harder than I thought.” Unclipping her seatbelt, she turned in the seat, so she was facing him. “I just—I never told even Aunt Tillie, you know? I don’t know if I should…” He could hear the torment in her voice. “I don’t know the rules,” she waved her hand around, “all the rules on what is allowed and what isn’t with the shifter clans.”
“Hey,” He reached over and rested his hand on hers, “anything. You can trust me.”
She nodded her head slowly.
Lifting his hand away, he tried to split his focus between her and on driving. “Do you want me to pull over so we can talk?”
“Uh, no. No, I can talk like this.” She sighed again, “I just don’t know how to start.”
“Take your time.” Trying to grip the steering wheel lightly, he flexed his stiff neck. His cat was wide awake inside him now, their mate was struggling with something. The anxiety coming off her was strong.
“Okay, when they got Leah out of there, her mom, right—”
“Right.” He agreed so she knew he was right there with her, hearing whatever she had to say.
“I was out before she got far, she was panicking and almost paralyzed by it,” she blew out a breath.
“It must have been terrifying.” He offered quietly.
“It was.” She cleared her throat, “I took off in the direction that a man told us to go. The direction he told Leah to go.”
The anxiety in her voice was making it sound hoarse. Without a word, he reached over and took a hold of her hand.
She squeezed his and continued to hold it, “I didn’t get as far as I’d hoped.” She snorted, “I mean there we were running through the city, looking all young and vulnerable, I guess…” She took a deep breath and then inhaled it slowly, “Minn burst out, to save us. I-I didn’t see this creepy man—” Releasing his hand, she adjusted her ponytail. “Minn saved us. I don’t know what could have happened.” She cleared her throat, “the creepy man didn’t survive it.”
Jesse looked over at her, he didn’t need to see her face clearly, the anxiety and fear pouring off her were almost choking him. Grabbing her hand, he held it firmly. “You and Minn did what you had to do to survive.”
“I’ve never told Leah. She doesn’t remember most of the trip back to the mountain.”
Her tone was so soft, that he almost thought it was Leah out for a second.
“I won’t claim to understand how it works between you, but if you feel this is something she needs to be sheltered from, then I’m behind you in your choice.” Her first shift was far too early, and her animal had killed someone. In Chicago. Could Devin research that? No, he couldn’t tell anyone, he’d just said he wouldn’t.
“I never told the grandparents, because I didn’t know if Minn had done something wrong...”
“Hey,” he leaned down so he could see her eyes, “you’re here now because your cat protected you. Period. There is no wrong in that.” His cat was going crazy. She was upset. Jesse could hardly breathe. She could have been killed if not for her cat. He looked back to the road, checked the mirrors, and then slowed and pulled onto the shoulder. Putting the van in park, he unclipped his seat belt and shifted in the seat so he could take both of her hands. “Look at me,” he waited until she did, “it shouldn’t have been that way. Your first shift should have been fun, an amazing thing in your life.” He held her gaze with his own, “the fact that it wasn’t, pisses me off in ways I can’t even express. Just know those responsible for it are going to pay.”
“But he’s already dead.”
Her quiet tone bothered his cat as much as it did him. “I’m talking about all of them, not just that creep Minn dealt with.”
She nodded in a shaky way.
“Is this why you have to fight to keep Minn under control? Are you afraid of it happening again? When Leah loses control of her it’s because your cat doesn’t know what’s safe and what isn’t?”
“I-I, we both aren’t sure of what Minn will do, anytime she’s out.” She cleared her throat, “on the mountain, it was safe, right? There weren’t a lot of people there, at any time—what do you mean my cat doesn’t know? How can she know what’s safe and not?”
Jesse squeezed her hands, “we all struggle with our animals at times,” he smirked briefly, “like right now, mine is so pissed, but worried at the same time. He’s demanding justice for you, but is pushing me to make you feel better, to feel calm,” he shrugged, “they’re always there, just under the surface monitoring things, that part is normal.”
“So how-how do you control him? How do you keep him inside?”
“With a lot of practice. That’s another part you were robbed of, the normal bonding that happens with your animal before they emerge. There was no way for your—” He remembered she didn’t call her mother. “Lyvia to help you with that and still keep it a secret that your animal was close at your age.”
Evanna nodded, her complete focus on his face. “They uh, worked really hard keeping us away from the guards and the men that came there.”
Jesse’s cat felt like he was taking claws to his insides, he focused so he wouldn’t visibly flinch. What men? “She did the right thing getting you out of there.”
Evanna nodded, “I don’t think Leah would have survived there much longer. I-I don’t know what happened before I was around, I can’t see it,” she pulled one hand free and tapped her head, “in here, there are parts of things that are closed off and I can’t see them. There’s a lot of parts that I keep Leah from too.”
Jesse nodded slowly, even though he understood none of it really, “you’re all doing what you need to do to survive and be safe.” He gave her a gentle smile, “that’s all I want, for you to feel safe. I don’t care if I have to drive you around the country to see different people from all over, I will make sure you get any help or training you need to feel safe, do you understand?”
“We can stay with you?” She lowered her eyes, “because to be honest, I’ve been freaking out a bit thinking you were going to dump us off somewhere and go back to your life...”
Jesse gripped her chin as gently as he could manage as his cat raged inside him, “I’m not dumping you off anywhere. If anything, I’d take you to my place,” he cringed, “that isn’t even completely built yet, and leave you there in peace where you’d be safe—if circumstances made it so I couldn’t have you with me, but I’d be coming back. Do you understand what I’m saying?”
She held his look for what felt like hours, “Yeah, you’re going to look out for us.” Her eyes glistened with unfallen tears, “I’m glad, I am really.” She sniffled, then cleared her throat, “it means the world that you will watch after Leah when I’m not out.”
“I’ll watch after all of you, and I will help with Minn as much as possible.”
“Right, okay.” She blew out a quick breath, “that makes me feel a lot better. I’ve been a little worried about what was going to happen when Minn was around others.” She straightened back, so his hand dropped away from her face. “Thanks, Jesse, I can’t even find the words to explain how much better that makes me feel. How being with you makes things easier.”
His cat was still agitated but settled a little bit when he heard those words. He wanted to tell her, now he felt like he was keeping a secret from her that he and Leah had shared.
Turning in the seat, she lifted her hand toward the windshield, “we should get going.” She turned and grinned at him, “I’m hungry and I can’t wait to try a burger.”
Jesse turned back in his seat, “burger and fries, maybe a milkshake.”
“I don’t know what a milkshake is, but I’ll take it, so far all the foods since you wandered into our village have been off the charts.” She smacked her lips together, “a ten on the tasty scale.”
Jesse’s stomach rumbled as if right on cue, “yeah, some food would be good.” He put on his seatbelt and looked in the mirror to see Thera was awake now and looking at him. “Maybe some chicken strip snacks for the kitty in the back.”
Evanna turned to look at the cat, “I’d say she’s up for it.”
Jesse pulled back out onto the road, “twenty minutes and we’ll stop for food.”
Evanna leaned forward and tapped the clock on the radio, “noted on your fancy clock.”