Chapter 44

Chapter 44

Daniel’s Pov

The anger still hummed inside me from the meeting with Lila, Evan a snake, a desperate one. And Sienna, she was reeling, I knew that. 

My gut twisted with the thought of her facing Zoe after everything. I wanted to go to her, to just be there, but I couldn't, not like that. 

I had to hold my ground, she needed to come to me, truly come to me, not out of fear or convenience, but because she finally understood what she wanted, what she needed.

The knock on my door was light, almost hesitant. My breath caught. I knew it was her, my heart hammered against my ribs, a desperate drumbeat wanting to sprint to the door, to pull her into my arms. But I held still, this had to be different.

I opened the door, Sienna stood there, her eyes red rimmed, her face pale. She looked exhausted, beaten down. My throat tightened. Every fiber of my being screamed to reach for her, but I kept my face blank, a cold mask.

"Daniel," she whispered, her voice thin, fragile. She wrapped her hands.

I just looked at her, said nothing, let the silence hang heavy between us. Let her feel it, the distance, the wall I had built. My heart ached to tear it down, to pull her close, but I couldn't, not yet. She had to take the first real step.

Her gaze finally met mine, filled with a desperate plea. "I, I had to come, Daniel," she began, her voice barely above a whisper, "I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry for everything. For pushing you away, for not seeing what was right in front of me. For calling you messy, for making you feel like your emotions were a burden. I was so lost, so incredibly lost, caught up in this fantasy of putting my family back together, a fantasy Evan fed me, a lie he spun so carefully. I wanted so badly for Zoe and Leo to have their father back, their 'whole family,' that I ignored all the red flags, all the warning signs. I ignored what you tried to tell me. I ignored what my heart was screaming. I was so afraid, Daniel, afraid of making the wrong choice again, afraid of what people would say, afraid of hurting my kids even more. But I hurt you. I pushed you away when you were the only one being real with me. I realize now that I was trying to hold onto a ghost, and in doing so, I almost lost something real, something truly good. I messed up, Daniel. I truly messed up, and I am so, so sorry." Her voice broke on the last words, tears welling in her eyes.

I kept my voice flat, even. "Okay."

Her head snapped up, her eyes, filled with a mix of hurt and surprise, met mine. "Okay?" she blurted, her voice rising, a crack of something fragile beneath the anger. "Just 'okay'? Is that all you have to say? After... after everything I just told you?"

A bitter laugh escaped me, short, sharp. "What do you want me to say, Sienna," I demanded, my voice low but firm, "What do you want me to do, welcome you back with open arms like nothing happened, like you haven't put me through hell, like you haven't pushed me away every single time the heat got too much for you."

Her eyes widened, she flinched as if I had struck her.

"I am a man, Sienna," I continued, my voice rising slightly, the carefully constructed wall threatening to crumble, "And I have needs, real needs, not just for a quick touch, not just for a convenient distraction when your life falls apart. You cannot come to me when you need me, when you're scared, and expect me to always run to you. Then, when you're done, when the crisis passes, I'm tossed aside like I was nothing to you."

My voice was raw now, the words poured out, years of frustration, of wanting her, of being pushed away, finally breaking free. I saw the shock on her face, the hurt, but she needed to hear it. She needed to understand. My own desire for her was a constant, aching wound. I wanted her to admit her part, to admit she wanted me too, not just a temporary fix.

She took a step closer, her hand reaching for mine, her fingers brushed my skin. A jolt went through me, my body craved her touch, it craved the warmth, the connection. But my mind was clearer, this was a test, a crucial one.

I pulled my hand back, away from her touch, away from the temptation to give in, to forgive too easily. "No," I stated, my voice hoarse, "Don't. I'm done with this, Sienna. I'm done with you messing with my head, with my life."

"Daniel, please," she whispered, her eyes pleaded with me. "I was wrong. About everything."

"You always said I was a child," I retorted, the old accusation stinging, "But you're the one who doesn't even know what she wants. One minute you're all fire, all passion. The next, you're building walls, pushing me away. You run to Evan, chasing some fairytale, and then you come back to me when he proves to be the monster you have always known he was."

My words were harsh, cruel even. But they were true, every single one of them. My heart ached with the pain of saying them. I wanted her to fight, to argue, to tell me she wanted me, that she needed me, for real.

I stepped back, opening the door wider, the cool evening air flowed into the hallway. "You should leave," I announced, my voice devoid of emotion now, a flat finality. "I'm done with this, I'm done with you."

Her eyes filled with tears. She stared at me, a silent plea in her gaze. But I kept my face hard, unyielding. I wanted to crush her to me, to tell her I didn't mean it, but I couldn't. Not until she understood, until she chose.

She picked up her bag from the floor, her movements slow, labored, like she was fighting every muscle in her body. She walked past me, out into the night. She didn't look back.

The door slammed shut, the sound echoed in the sudden silence of my apartment. My legs gave out, I fell to the ground, sinking onto the floorboards. My head dropped to my knees. The cold mask I had worn shattered. My body shook.

It was a lie, all of it. Every cold word. Every harsh accusation. I wanted her, I wanted her back more than I wanted my next breath. The pain was a physical ache in my chest. I had pushed her away, I had hurt her, but it had to be this way. She had to choose, truly choose, not just me as a refuge, but me as her future.

A hand settled on my shoulder, gentle, firm. "Daniel," Lila's voice murmured from behind me. She had been there, listening, knowing. "You okay?"

I shook my head, my voice raw with emotion. "No," I choked out, "God. No."

She sat beside me, her presence a silent comfort. I felt completely broken, but somewhere, deep down, a tiny ember of hope remained. She would come back. She had to. Because I would never stop wanting her, never.