Chapter 39 Chapter 38:
Anna:
I smile contentedly as I make my way up to the numerous penthouse that Theo owns. These past few days have been taking a huge toll on me, but things are going to work out for me. They always do.
The elevator glides open and I push the door of Theo’s penthouse, he has given me the keys not too long, but the door is already unlocked, indicating he’s already home. My heart turns giddy like a high school teenager whose crush just kissed her.
The moment I see him, I become breathless. There he is, staring out the window that overlooks the whole city, he’s dressed in a turtleneck sweater over a blazer, tucked into dark slacks, looking breathtakingly handsome. I take a moment to look at him from behind, with those huge bulging muscles.
Sometimes, I think I made a grave mistake. Why didn’t I meet Theodore sooner? Why did I marry that loser douchebag? Why wasn’t I given Theo?
It takes him five seconds before he notices my presence, turning towards me, his lips curling up into a lazy smile that makes heat rush to my thighs. “Hey you.” His deep voice has me swooning. Dropping my bag on the couch, I walk towards him with a seductive smile of my own.
“What are you doing here?” He asks, his tone soft, teasing but his gaze burns like fire.
“I don’t know,” I reply honestly, right now what I crave is his warmth pressing against me. “I just miss you, that's all.” He closes his distance between us and his lips devour mine, he holds me firmly, hands circled around my waist desperately, the sharp scent of his cologne filling my senses.
With one swift motion, he presses me against the glass window, the cold seeping through my dress, his lips trail along my collarbone, igniting every bit of passion inside me.
His dark eyes trail over my body, his lips curling into a dangerous smile, “You wore this dress knowing exactly what it would do to me.” His hand seeps into my black dress, his hand warm against my thigh. My breath hitches as he presses closer; the hard surface at my back keeps in as Theo slides his hand further.
“You are mine now,” he growls into my ear, my body trembling under his touch. “Say it,” he yanks my hair, my body shaking hard.
“I-am-yours.” I whisper.
“Good girl.” He murmurs against my skin, “And you are never to forget that, any man that touches what is mine will suffer the consequences, you belong to me alone.”
Theo slows, his forehead resting against mine as we both struggle to catch our breath, his hands still remain on my thighs, holding me steady. His dark eyes lock with mine.
“You are mine, Anna.” He says, his voice softer, but still firm. “Don’t ever forget that. Ever.”
I look him in the eye and I can feel the threat hanging right there: Theo isn’t a man to mess with, he knows that I killed my husband, hell he helped me hide his body. If by any chance, I leave him today, he will destroy my life, I will be locked away in jail for the rest of my life.
I have the feeling that someone like Theo can destroy my life with just a snap of his fingers.
After having dinner, Theo and I are sprawled on the bed, my head resting on his chest, his hand stroking my hair delicately; I reach out and turn off the lamp, while staring at the ceiling. Theo’s awfully quiet today, so I say gently. “What’s on your mind? Is this about the election?”
“No, I got that covered.” His voice is hoarse, I don’t know what he means by covered, but in the little time that I have known Theo, I know that he has a way of always winning. “Come on; tell me about your day.”
My face brightens, Kevin and I, we never had this, that moment where it is just the two of you talking about random stuff, discussing how your day went, just talking. It is that little thing that matters, which was what, fuelled my anger as I kept hitting that baseball bat on his head.
I spent my whole day tracking down Alisha; it was fun stalking a celebrity especially when that celebrity turns out to be stalking someone else. She has been following Arya around for some unknown reasons, which might soon become clear.
But, I have an idea why she is stalking Arya. I already pieced out the story in my head, she’s hopelessly in love with Devon even though she’s married, she’s pissed off and jealous of Arya and now just wants to kill her.
But instead of saying all those to Theo, I just say. “It went splendidly well.” Earlier, I sent her a text with an unknown number, asking her to meet up, though I am not quite sure she will show up.
“My day went fine too,” He remains quiet again and I know something’s bothering him deeply, “I was adopted, you know.”
I keep quiet, listening. This is the first time that Theo is opening up to me about his family; it’s one of those rare moments.
“I was in the system for gosh knows how long before I was adopted. They had no children, so I was there. They treated me well, they made me who I am right now, and I feel immensely grateful for their help.” His voice is breaking.
“You are rich now, you could easily find out who your birth mother is, right?” I ask, doesn’t he have even a little bit of curiosity?
“Oh...I know who my birth mother is,” his voice suddenly turns hard. “She’s happy now; she doesn’t need me imposing in her life.”
“Don’t be like that; I am sure she will be happy to see you. Why don’t you pay her a visit? I could come with you.”
“And say what exactly? I am not the type to destroy her perfectly layered life, if she wanted to, she would have reached out, it’s clear that she doesn’t want me in her life.” He sighs, “I don’t want to have this talk anymore, goodnight Anna.” He kisses my forehead, signalling the end of the conversation.
Sighing, I tell him goodnight, still as I try to sleep, I keep on replaying our conversation.
\--
Clara:
The moment the car pulls up in front of Golden Retreat, I become a nervous wreck.
Axel sent his driver to pick me up, my sisters spent their whole time doing my make-up when I told them about the date with Axel, so far they have given me tons of dating advice, kissing tips, and a ‘how to act seductive’ guidebook. This stuff is easy for them, not for me.
“Thank you for the ride,” I tell Axel’s driver, he gives me a polite smile before driving off. My phone dings with texts from my sisters, probably asking about updates with Axel. They know that this is really important for me, so I have to do this right.
Stepping into Golden Retreat is like entering a new world where people are dressed as royals, laughing, clinking glasses of champagne and suddenly, I feel out of place here, like I don’t belong.
Then I spot him, it’s hard to see anybody through the crowd, but Axel has always stood out to me. He’s dressed in a navy blue suit, laughing with a blonde woman; he’s handsome, so good-looking that my legs instantly go weak. Should I walk up to them? Wave or smile?
I am still debating on my next thoughts when Axel sees me; his face brightens as he walks over to me. I suddenly feel like Cinderella awaiting her perfect prince charming. I really don’t believe in fairy tales, but just for a moment while he walks towards me, I want to believe in it.
“Hi.” He’s smiling, extending his hands towards me. “You look dashing, Clara.”
I swallow, is this really happening? I have dreamed of this for years and now that it is finally happening, I really don’t know what to do.
My face reddens as I mutter, “Thank you.”
“Come.” His voice is soft as I place my hand inside his; he drags me towards the dance floor, his touch warm. Everyone is looking at us; I don’t recognise some people, because they are way out of my circle. However, I sight the owner of Golden Retreat, a tattooed man dressed in a simple shirt and plain trousers.
My heart stills as Axel places his hand on my waist gently, swaying me towards the keyboard music. I place my trembling hand in his, his skin warm against mine. Drawing me closer, our bodies move together in a perfect rhythm.
I can feel the heat of his body through the thin fabric of my shirt. The scent of him- expensive cologne and his natural body scent envelops me, depriving me of thinking properly.
“You have to relax, Clara.” Axel chuckles, as we take a step forward. How can I relax when everybody is literally looking at us? The women are crossing their hands, it’s easy to tell that they are glaring at me and it makes me feel uncomfortable.
When the music ends, people clap but I have the strange feeling that they are cheering for him, why won’t they? He’s the CEO of a multi-billion company and I? I am just the woman of a small design house he invited to be his date.
A red-haired woman rushes towards our side, immediately placing her hand on Axel’s biceps. “You were wonderful while dancing, just like your father.”
“Thank you,” Axel smiles politely.
I feel the urgent need to slip away, “sorry, but I have to go use the bathroom.” The red-haired woman seems grateful that I am leaving, but Axel raises his brows.
Without waiting, I make my way upstairs but I don’t go to the bathroom, instead I push open a door at random. The room is quiet, lined with shelves of books and a few plush chairs, letting out a shaky breath; I collapse on the chair, trying to swallow the lump in my throat, keeping in the tears from falling.
“Not here. Not now,” I whisper to myself, performing the exercise that my therapist taught me whenever I am feeling a panic attack rising. The door of the room creaks open and my stomach twists. Oh no.
“This doesn’t look like the bathroom,” I stare up to see Axel leaning casually against the doorframe; however his voice is soft, more teasing.
I try to smile, but it comes out in the most pathetic way, “I guess I got lost.”
“Lost?” He repeats, still staring at me with those brown eyes of his. “Or avoiding something?”
He reads right past me. “I feel like I don’t belong here, Axel.” I admit, my voice barely above a whisper. “This is not my world.”
His eyes turn serious as he crouches in front of me, his hands resting on the arms of the chair, caging me in. “Look at me.” He says seriously, but I can’t bring myself to look into his eyes, I might collapse into tears if I do.
His warm fingers gently brush against my chin, making me look at him. “You can belong wherever you want to belong, Clara. The whole world is your world, Okay?”
“Okay,” I nod, laughing nervously.
His hands brush against my cheek, sending a shiver of electricity through my body. Axel leans in. “I want to kiss you, Clara. Since you walked into that room tonight; I can’t get you out of my mind.” He admits, leaving me shocked.
Before I can process anything, his lips meet mine in a gentle kind of way, almost hesitant as if he’s waiting for my answer, I find myself leaning in, wanting to feel it, he deepens the kiss as I open up for him, I cling unto his suit jacket as his hands find my waist, pulling me closer.
The world seems to fade away and we are the only thing that matters, for a moment, I try to desperately hang on to the fact that is real. That this is mine.
But then, the waves come crashing into me, reality punching me straight in the guts. What am I thinking? That something could ever work out between us? Every painful memory, every doubt, every single reason why I don’t deserve him replays in my brain.
Tears sting my eyes, making me look pathetic. Axel notices my distressed state and pulls away, touching my hand with concern. “What’s wrong? Did I hurt you?”
I am shaking my head negatively, but he probes further. “What’s wrong?”
It’s hard not to be in his presence and not break down, I find myself saying. “I can’t do this, I have to go now.” Standing up from the chair, he attempts to follow me, but I say, “Please, don’t.”
He’s hurt, I am leaving with no apparent reason, he must think I am such a horrible person. I don’t think I will be able to erase the look in his eyes as I leave the room, and step out of Golden Retreat.
The tears come pouring down as I hurriedly send a text to my sisters and I’s group chat.
Me: Please, come pick me up right now.
Chloe’s text comes in immediately.
Chloe: Why? What’s wrong? Aren’t you at the party anymore?
Me: Axel kissed me and I messed it up, please just come right now.
Chloe: Alright, I am coming now.
The dull ache hammers in my chest, why do I always mess things up?