Chapter 150 Final Decision

Chapter 150 Final Decision
Maddie's POV

We pulled up to the house, the drive home was silent, I was still a bit mad at Mariko, the familiar sight of the front porch and the soft glow of the afternoon sun over the trees made me feel a little more grounded after the long day. I turned to glance at Mariko, who was already gathering his keys and stepping out of the car with a sigh. We hadn’t spoken much since the conversation in my office earlier. The tension still lingered between us, but we both knew the kids were waiting, and whatever had to be dealt with would have to wait.

As soon as he opened the front door, the sound of the TV echoed through the house. Bella was sitting in the lounge, sprawled on the floor with her art supplies scattered around her. She had a page in front of her, one of her infamous princess dresses half-drawn with thick, colorful lines.

Mariko walked in first, and Bella’s face immediately lit up. “Daddy!” she squealed, her small legs pumping as she bolted toward him.

Mariko scooped her up effortlessly, spinning her around like she was still a tiny baby, though she had grown so much. "Hey," he murmured, pressing a kiss to her cheek. She giggled and wrapped her arms around his neck tightly.

"Daddy, my favorite shoes are gone!" Bella announced dramatically, sticking out her lower lip in that pout she had perfected. "Angel told me to wear the pink ones, but I don’t like them. They don’t match!"

Mariko chuckled softly, setting her back down on her feet, and he crouched in front of her. “Sometimes we have to make do with what we’ve got. If Angel told you to wear the pink ones, then you listen to her and Maddie, okay?” He ruffled her hair playfully. “I will help you look for your favorite shoes later, but for now, you have to cooperate with what you have.”

Bella pouted a bit longer before breaking into a smile. “Okay, Daddy.” She wrapped her around his neck and kissed him on the cheek, then she skipped back to her coloring as if the shoe disaster had never happened. I can't even deal with her at this point.

The exhaustion from the morning’s chaos still weighed heavily on me. I placed my handbag down on the recliner, but my mind wandered back to the meltdown earlier, how the morning had spun out of control so fast. Bella had been part of that, her tears and tantrums over small things like her shoes adding fuel to the fire. I felt a flicker of guilt for being upset with her, but I couldn’t deny how overwhelming it had all been.

I walked down the hallway, the familiar creaks of the floor beneath my feet a small comfort. The nursery door was slightly ajar, and when I stepped inside, the soft scent of baby powder greeted me. Rosie was sitting in the rocking chair, cradling Mikayla, her eyes drooping as she began to doze off in Rosie’s arms.

Rosie looked up and smiled when she saw me. "Hey," she whispered, her voice gentle. "How are you doing?"

I sighed and gave her a tired smile in return. “I’m... coping,” I said honestly, moving to sit in the other rocking chair next to her. I wasn’t sure how else to put it. Coping was the only word that seemed to fit these days.

Rosie rocked back and forth with Mikayla in her arms, her soft hums filling the room. I peeked through the other crib, Marielle was fast asleep. “It’s been a lot, huh? Especially this morning.”

I nodded, leaning back in the chair, my body still tense from everything. “Yeah… this morning was a mess. Bella’s shoes, Angel being late, the twins crying… and then I just… I couldn’t handle it. I have never felt so overwhelmed in my life.”

Rosie’s eyes softened, and she looked at me with concern. “That is a lot for anyone to handle. It’s okay to feel like you’re at your limit. You’ve got so much on your plate with the kids, work, everything.”

Her words were comforting, but they also hit too close to home. “I know,” I admitted, my voice barely above a whisper. “But I feel like I should be able to do it all. Mariko does so much, and I keep falling apart when he isn't around.” I glanced over at Mikayla, who had now fully fallen asleep, her little fingers curling around Rosie’s shirt. “I just want to be strong for them, you know?”

Rosie gave me a small, reassuring smile. “You are strong, Maddie. You are one of the strongest people I know. But even strong people need help. And it’s okay to admit when you are overwhelmed.” She paused, looking down at Mikayla before continuing, “You have a lot of kids to take care of, and you’ve been doing it. That is something to be proud of.”

I let her words wash over me, feeling a small sense of relief settle into my chest. But there was still so much weight I couldn’t shake off. “I’m just… frustrated,” I confessed. “Frustrated with everything. With Mariko, with the situation with Amber, with how much responsibility is on my shoulders. And then… there’s the whole thing about tying my tubes.”

Rosie’s expression shifted slightly, but she didn’t say anything right away. She just kept rocking Mikayla, letting me spill my thoughts without interruption. “I told Mariko I wanted to do it because I can’t imagine handling more kids on top of this. It feels like too much already. But I know he doesn't want me to.” I swallowed, the lump in my throat growing. “And now I feel like I’m failing at being a mother because of it.”

Rosie shook her head firmly. “Maddie, don’t think that way. You are not failing at anything. You have to do what’s right for you, what you can handle. Having kids is a big decision, and it’s something you and Mariko need to be on the same page about. But don’t ever feel like not wanting more makes you any less of a mother.”

Her words hit me deep, and for the first time in days, I felt the prick of tears in my eyes. “I just… I want to make the right choice,” I murmured, wiping at my eyes quickly. “But I don’t know if I can.”

She smiled softly, her eyes full of understanding. “You will figure it out. You and Mariko both. Just take it one step at a time. And remember, it’s okay to ask for help when you need it. You don’t have to carry everything on your own, Miranda and Rosie have been telling me the same things now.”

I took a deep breath, nodding as I tried to absorb her encouragement. It wasn’t easy. Nothing about this situation was. But hearing her say those things made me feel less alone, less like I was drowning in a sea of responsibilities without a lifeline.

“Thank you,” I whispered, my voice thick with emotion. “I don’t know what I would do without you, Rosie.”

She smiled warmly, standing up slowly as she held Mikayla close. “You would still be the amazing mother you are. But it’s okay to lean on people when you need to. Don’t forget that.”

As she made her way over to the crib to lay Mikayla down, I sat in the chair, feeling the weight on my shoulders lighten just a little bit. It wasn’t much, but it was enough to get me through the rest of the evening. And for now, that would have to be enough.



Mariko's POV

The house had finally quieted down. After a long day of work and running around, the only thing left to do was tuck the kids in. Bella was still buzzing with energy even after watching her favorite show and sketching earlier, but Angel seemed more subdued. She had been distant ever since Maddie and I hardly spoke to each other over dinner, and I knew she had noticed. Kids notice everything, no matter how much you try to shield them from the adult stuff.

I walked Bella to her room first. She was still skipping slightly, her pink pajama bottoms dragging a bit on the floor because they were just a touch too long. She jumped into bed, giggling, and pulled her covers up to her chin, her wild curls framing her face like a halo.

“Daddy, are you going to find my shoes tomorrow, right?” she asked, blinking up at me, her eyes shining with excitement.

I chuckled softly. “Yes, I will look for them first thing in the morning. But tonight, it’s time for sleep, okay?”

She gave me a small pout but nodded. “Okay. Goodnight, Daddy.” I leaned over her, pressing a kiss to her forehead. “Goodnight. Sweet dreams.”

I pulled back and switched off her lamp, leaving her colorful nightlight on before I quietly shut the door behind me. It always amazed me how quickly Bella could shift from running around like a whirlwind to snuggling under her blankets, drifting off to sleep.

As I walked down the hallway towards Angel’s bedroom, my mind wandered. I knew Angel had been worrying about Maddie and me. She hadn’t said much about it, but she didn’t have to. I could see it in the way her brows furrowed at dinner or how she would quietly step in to help out with Bella whenever she could.

I knocked on her door gently before pushing it open. She was sitting up in bed, reading one of her books, her long hair cascading over her shoulders. She looked up when I entered, setting the book aside with a soft smile.

“Hey,” she said, though there was a hint of something in her voice, concern, maybe.

“Hey, Angel,” I replied, sitting down on the edge of her bed. “You doing okay?”

She nodded but then bit her lip. “I guess… I’m just worried,” she admitted, her voice quieter now. “About you and Maddie.”

I sighed softly, reaching out to brush a strand of hair behind her ear. “I know. But you don’t have to worry about that, okay? Maddie and I are fine. Sometimes, things get tough, and we have disagreements, but that’s normal. Every family goes through rough patches.”

Angel looked up at me, her eyes searching mine. “Are you sure?”

I smiled gently, leaning in a bit closer. “I promise you, we are going to be okay. Maddie and I love each other, and we love all of you more than anything. There are just some things we have to figure out, but it doesn’t mean we are not okay.”

She seemed to take that in, her expression softening a little. “I guess… I just don’t like seeing you both upset.”

“I know,” I said, squeezing her hand gently. “But that’s life sometimes. It has hiccups, and you have to work through them. You don’t have to worry about anything, though. You have been a big help with Bella, and we appreciate that more than you know.”

Angel gave a small smile, clearly reassured. “Thank you. I’m glad I can help.”

I kissed her forehead like I did with Bella. I pulled back, “You’re doing great, Angel. Now, you should get some sleep.”

She nodded, sinking back into her pillows as I stood up and headed for the door. “Goodnight.”

“Goodnight, Angel,” I replied before closing her door softly behind me.

I paused in the hallway for a moment, taking a deep breath. I always hated that the kids picked up on the tension between Maddie and me. It was something I wished I could protect them from. But Angel was smart, mature beyond her years. She had a way of sensing when things were off.

With a heavy heart, I walked toward our bedroom. Maddie was already in bed, sitting up against the headboard, she was scrolling on her phone, her expression tired but still alert. She glanced up when I entered the room, but didn’t say anything at first. The silence between us was thick, the unspoken conversation from earlier hanging in the air.

I sat down on the edge of the bed, my back turned to her for a moment as I tried to collect my thoughts. Finally, I turned to face her. “Maddie,” I started, my voice quiet, “We need to talk about this. About tying your tubes.” She placed her phone on the bedside table and turned her attention on me.

Her shoulders were tensed slightly, but she didn’t avert her eyes. “What about it?” she asked, her voice guarded.

I took a deep breath, trying to find the right words. “I just… I want to make sure this is really what you want. I know it has been overwhelming lately, and I don’t want you to regret this decision down the road.”

Maddie looked away for a moment, her fingers fiddling with the edge of the blanket. “I have thought about it. I don’t see how I could handle having another child. I can barely keep it together with the ones we have now. I know you want another one, it was and is obvious. But...” She trailed off, her voice breaking slightly.

I reached out, gently placing my hand over hers. “I get that,” I said softly. “I see how hard it has been for you, and I don’t want to make things worse. I just… I don’t want you to rush into this decision because of the stress. I’m open to the idea of having another child, but if that’s not what you want, I will respect that. It’s your body, and your choice.”

Her eyes softened, but there was still a flicker of pain behind them. “This isn’t just about the stress, Mariko. It’s about knowing my limits. I don’t want to bring another child into the world, and then it becomes too overwhelming again.”

Hearing her say that felt like a knife twisting in my chest, but I had to respect her honesty. “I understand,” I said quietly, though the weight of the words settled heavily on me. “It’s not easy for me to hear, but if that is how you feel, then I support you. I don’t want to push you into something that’s going to make you feel more overwhelmed.”

Her eyes held my gaze, her expression softening. “I don’t want to hurt you. I know how much you love the idea of a big family. But I just can’t… not anymore.”

I nodded slowly, trying to mask the hurt that was building inside me. “I know,” I whispered. “And I’m not going to push you. Our family… the one we have now, is enough. It’s more than enough.”

She moved closer towards me, resting her head against my shoulder, and I wrapped my arm around her. We sat there in silence for a moment, the weight of the conversation settling between us. It was hard to let go of the dream of one more child, but at the same time, I couldn’t bear the thought of adding to her burden.

“Thank you,” she whispered after a while, her voice thick with emotion. “For understanding.”

I pressed a kiss to the top of her head. “I love you. I just want you to be happy.”

She nodded, and I could feel her body relax against mine. We climbed under the covers together, and I pulled her close, my arm wrapped around her waist as we lay in the quiet of our bedroom. Despite everything, being close to her like this made me realize that as long as we had each other and the family we had already built, things would be okay. I would make sure of that.

As I closed my eyes, holding her in my arms, I reminded myself that what mattered most wasn’t the size of our family, but the love we shared for the ones who were already here. They were enough. Maddie was enough and that would have to be enough for me too.