Chapter 12: Chapter Twelve

BETWEEN CLAWS AND CARE

GABRIELLA'S POV

I heard his voice before I saw him.

It sounded hoarse and broken. He called my name, but it didn’t sound like Jax. Not the one I remembered. Not the one who used to hold me and look at me like I was something soft and precious. This voice sounded like a voice from the depths of hell, screaming for me to come to its depth.

And the worst part? I want to go to hell if it means getting Jax back.

I was already at the top of the staircase when it happened. Jack stood between us, clutching tight to a silver dagger like he’d need to use it. I didn’t know if he meant to protect me or stop his brother. Maybe both.

Jax’s body was wrecked. It was barely upright with blood soaked through his torn shirt, flowing down his sides. I didn’t know how much of it was his and how much he’d taken from something else. His eyes weren’t just glowing—they were blazing in gold and red sharply.

He looked at me like he didn’t know whether to run or destroy everything just to get close.

I should have been afraid. I knew I should’ve been. He wasn’t safe. He wasn’t even human anymore. The Servinium still lived inside him like a second skin, trying to push its way to the surface. His claws were halfway out. His veins were blackened. His mouth was open, breathing ragged and wet as his canines protruded and saliva ran down  his lips.

But all I saw was him.

Jax.

And I couldn’t stay away.

“Jax,” I whispered again, my voice breaking.

He twitched like my voice had touched something inside him.

He did. He definitely did.

Jack hissed my name. “Gabriella, get back. He’s not—”

“He is,” I said. “He’s still in there.”

“Barely.”

“Still.”

I stepped past him.

Jack’s arm snapped out, trying to stop me, but I shrugged him off. “If you try to stop me, I swear I’ll scream so loud the whole damn pack will think you’re the monster.”

He stared at me for a second, his jaw clenching, then he let me go.

Jax didn’t move. He stood at the bottom of the stairs, shoulders hunched his claws twitching at his sides. His lips peeled back, not in a snarl, but something worse—like he didn’t know how to smile anymore.

I took a step down. One. Then another.

And another.

I swallowed, my heart thudding softly.

The air was thick with heat. He smelled of blood and earth and something completely different that didn’t belong in his body.

“Jax,” I said again, louder this time. “It’s me.”

He didn’t speak or blink or move, I saw the slight twitch of his fingers, and I heard the tiny sound of a breath.

“I know it hurts,” I said. “I know you’re fighting it. You’ve always fought it.”

He let out a sound that belonged somewhere between a growl and a sob.

He was feral, but he was still him. The Servinium was  hurting his system. But he was still human. And wolf.

I reached him. Close enough to see the tear at the corner of his eyes. Close enough to touch him and I didn’t hesitate. I touched him.

His chest. Over his heart, then my fingers slide back to his face, cupping his cheeks.

And the moment I did, his body flinched like I’d set him on fire. He stumbled back into the wall, a raw scream bursting from his lungs.

But he didn’t hurt me. He never hurt me, but he was hurt.

I followed him,  stepping closer, even as the light in his eyes flickered like a bulb.

“You’re not a monster,” I said. “You’re not the thing they tried to make you.”

He grabbed the wall behind him like it was the only thing keeping him upright. His claws dug into the plaster. He was shaking so hard I thought he’d collapse.

“I can’t—” he rasped. “I don’t know how to stop it— I'll hurt you—”

“Then don’t. Don’t stop it for them.” I pressed my forehead to his chest. “Just stop it for me. You won't. I know you won't”

His hands hovered in the air, unsure. Like he was afraid to touch me.

I grabbed them. Claws and fur. Pressed them to my sides.

He gasped.

“I’m not afraid of you,” I said.

“You should be.” His voice cracked. “I almost tore a healer’s face off. I—Gabriella, I don’t even remember getting here.”

“You remembered my name.” I mutter softly, “It's the same thing.”

He froze and that was the crack in the armor.

Jax made a strangled noise and sank to his knees. I followed him down crouching beside him. He pressed his face into my stomach like he wanted to crawl inside me and disappear. His arms wrapped around my hips, clutching me tightly and desperately.

“I’m here,” I whispered, my fingers in his hair. “I’m here. I’m not going anywhere.”

He shook in my arms. He shook like the storm inside him was still screaming, but my voice was louder.

I didn’t know how long we stayed like that. Minutes. Hours. I didn’t care. The world could’ve burned around us and I wouldn’t have moved.

Eventually, he pulled back. Just far enough to look at me.

His eyes were duller now. They were still glowing, but softer now. It looked…normal.

“I’m sorry,” he said.

I pressed my hand to his jaw. “Don’t be.”

“I almost lost control of myself. Again.”

“But you didn’t.”

His lips trembled. “I don’t know what’s wrong with me.”

“You were poisoned. You were broken. But you’re not gone.”

He leaned into my touch and then he kissed me.

Not the rough or wild kind. Just lips on lips, and I kissed him back.

Because I needed him, too.

I missed him so much, Gods!

When we broke apart, I rested my forehead against his.

“We’ll fix this,” I said. “Together.”

“I don’t know if it can be fixed. There's no cure. Only you. I only need to be with mate. Mate.”

He growled, burying his face into my chest.

Jack cleared his throat behind us.

I turned, not moving away from Jax.

Jack looked like he wanted to say something—maybe a dozen things—but settled on, “We should get him inside. Before someone sees.”

I nodded.

“Need to be with mate,” he only muttered as I and Jack both lift him up.