Chapter 54: Chapter 54

Elari

The next few weeks were as normal as life in Frostveil could ever be. Rivan got out of the hospital five days after Kade had attacked him and instantly went back to being his normal cheery self. It was like to him nothing had happened. He was still my friend, who just so happened to hold my hand and pretend he was my boyfriend in public.

He’d been hurt because of me but to Rivan it didn’t seem like that mattered. And the more time I spent with him the more I realised he was the kind of guy, any girl would be lucky to have as their boyfriend.

For real, not fake.

Only I couldn’t have a boyfriend. Because I had a damn mate. Not a fates one, a goddess chosen one.

“Has he been giving you any more trouble?” Rivan's soft voice brought me back to reality the second before he took my legs from under me and sent me tumbling to the mat.

A few months ago that would have been me winded and out of the game but I had been training hard these last few months. I was stronger now, faster and more skilled and I easily took him down with me. Wrapping my legs around his waist I twisted and slammed him down onto the mat. My body weight  was fully over his.

I felt him suck in a breath. “Elari.” He breathed. His eyes widening. I couldn’t help but blush. I was right on top of him. My thighs gripping his hips and my hands pinning his arms to the floor.

A moment passed between us. A single second where I knew that he was feeling things that definitely weren’t fake.

“I should-“ I went to scramble backwards and his hands came out to close around my hips. Causing my breath to lodge in my throat.

Our eyes clashed.

“That was really good Elari.” He said with one final squeeze of my hips before he let me jump to my feet. I reached for his hand and heaved him to his feet. The stack of bracelets on my arm clanging together.

He glanced down at them with a frown. I knew he wanted to ask why I always wore them. Just like I knew he suspected I was using them to hide something. He was just too much of a gentleman to ask me out right.

It was one of the reasons I liked him so much. Unlike our other friends he didn’t press the matter.

“Thanks.” I blushed and I didn’t know why I was blushing. Except he was looking at me with so much longing that it kind of reminded me of how Kade kept looking at me when he thought I wasn’t looking.

“I have a good teacher.”

He grinned at me. “I think we work good together Elari.” He said softly. “I think we make a good team.”

I had to admit he was right.

“So are you going to answer the question?” He prompted. I stared at him confused for a second before I realised who he was talking about.

Sighing, I hunched my shoulders. “Kade hasn’t been a problem. In fact he hasn’t spoken to me at all.”

And that was the truth. Sometimes I felt him watching me. Sometimes even when I couldn’t see him. Kade had turned into my shadow. Always watching, always close by but to anyone looking , he was cold and indifferent.

Which should have made me happy. But goddess chosen mate marks didn’t just disappear no matter how much we wanted them to.

I scratched at my wrist. Rivan's eyes followed the movement and I ducked my head down.

“He’s always about, you know that right?”

My head snapped upwards to meet his eyes. “Has he hurt you again?”

Rivan shook his head. “No, he doesn’t acknowledge me at all which suits me just fine.” He shrugged. “It’s not like he was a friend to begin with and even if he was. My loyalty would be to you.”

Our eyes met. I could tell he was telling me the truth. Goddess, I didn’t deserve him. Without thinking I took a step towards him and then another until only an inch separated us.

Rivans eyes widened as I reached up on my tiptoes and pressed my lips to his softly.

It was an almost not there kiss. Just a peck. But heat flamed up his throat. “Elari.” He whispered my name.

“I am so lucky to have you Rivan.” My hands rested on his shoulders. “I don’t know what I would do without you.” I closed my eyes. The feeling of unease was almost overwhelming. “I love you.”

I meant it. I did love him. It might not be in the way he wanted me to love him. Or in the way I felt for Kade but I still loved Rivan.

Reaching out, he stroked his fingers down my cheek. “I love you too Elari.” He whispered. “I know you don’t love me in the same way you love-“ he broke off with a shake of his head but didn’t finish that sentence. “It doesn’t matter to me.” He smiled. “I’ll take whatever you can give me. And I’ll never betray you.” He shrugged. “Maybe one day you will-“

I opened my mouth to tell him I did love him as much as I was able to but at that moment a howl rent the air outside the windows. A wail of a wolf in pain.

My heart twisted.

Kade.

Rushing towards the window, I saw him sprinting away. A flick of a jet black tail against the snow. He had been watching just like he always was and he had heard me tell another man I loved him.

Had he also saw me kiss him?

Another howl went up. The sound of heartbreak.

“Are you ok?” Rivan's kind hands came down onto my shoulders. His front curved against my back as we both watched Kades wolf run towards the trees. Mutely I nodded. “Do you need to go to him?”

I shot a look behind me. He knew. He knew Kade was my mate. I could see it in his eyes.

“No.” I said softly. “No I don’t need to go to him,”

I didn’t need to , my heart was already breaking because his was. I had caused my mate pain. So I felt that as well.